I'm worried about my little brother

[bornbaker]

He never texts. Or calls. He's 17 (will be 18 in November) and is heading to college in a week. A little bit of back story: my mom get's really OCD about throwing parties and can be really mean. My dad just got a new job and it's home much during the week (one hour commute one way) and there's some stuff between my parents involving the new job. 

Anyway. I get this text:

Attachment Deleted

To which I told him he could call me anytime. And reminded him how crazy mom gets when she plans things. I asked if he wanted my to call them and tell them to knock it the f-off, but he said he was ok and was just going to go to bed. 

Then I get this text:

Attachment Deleted

I might still call my mom tomorrow to a) tell her to calm the f-down and knock off the crap (but nicer ) and b) this does worry me. I don't know what to do :/ thoughts? Am I just reading too much into this?

He never texts me. Never says love ya. I didn't text back after this since he said he was going to bed. Don't want to wake him. About a year and a half ago his good friend committed suicide. While I don't think he would do anything like that, I'm just worried that maybe he's freaking out about something and needs help, from me or someone else. 

Sorry if I don't get back on here to check until morning. I'm sleepy, too and need to hit the hay soon. Just needed to get this out there.

[pantsparty]

I would call him right away. Hell, if he was close, I'd drive over there. If he never reaches out like this, yes, this would definitely concern me. Not in a suicide way, just in a he REALLY needs someone to talk to right now.

[meganew]

If you're worried, I would call. Even if you wake him up- just to tell him that you love him and remind him that soon he'll be away from family craziness, you're proud of him, etc. I'm sure it'll be mainly to make you feel better, but I honestly would be a little on edge, too. The fact that his friend committed suicide is what really got to me.

[krystee]

He took a big step in telling you he needs to talk. Instead of telling him to call anytime, just pick up the phone and call him. He might be too nervous/uncomfortable to take that next step. I would call him now for peace of mind an because it sounds like that's what he needs.

[winelady]

I agree. Call and or text him right away.

[takeonyou]

Call him or go there. Or call you parents and tell them to grow up.

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[birdistheword]

Call him. It would scare me too, since this is out of character for him.

[isabel]

I'm with everyone else. Make sure he knows how much you care. Going over there or calling him is not overboard.

[MrsAxilla]

I'd call him.

[Deleted]

Do you live close? I would go over there tonight. Even if it was just to give him a hug.

[polka]

I would call him or see him. I am very close to my brother and he means the world to me, so anything that would cause me to be even a little concerned would have me going crazy. So I get that you're worried.

I hope everything works out and you can find out what other things are stressing him out.

[bornbaker]

I can't go over there, they (mom, dad, bro) live about an hour away. H works in the AM so I'm on baby duty.

I told him I would call him in the AM. And I would call mom/dad and tell them to knock it off. Reminded him how awesome college is going to be and how he's going to do an amazing job and that H and I are proud of him.

[Deleted]

Bring the baby.

[Deleted]

I'm with Miso - take the baby and go.

He asked you not to talk to your mom and dad - and now that he knows you're going to, it might make him more panicky rather than relieved. My relationship with my parents was really bad when I was a teenager and I reached out for help and someone went to my parents. It only made things a million times worse for me.

Be his advocate by just being there for him.

[ElizabethBennet]

I'd take the baby and go. Even if he isn't suicidal, he may just need to know that someone is going to take the time for him.

[tulip]

He is giving you veiled thoughts, CALL him. My home town was plagued with suicides and I didn't know what to pick up on. A dear friend of mine ended up dead and it haunts me, so CALL him.

I will say, that after his death my parents watched me like a hawk. It was ridiculous (in my 17 year old mine) because I wouldn't and would not turn to that. But H and I have both been touched by it at a young age. He told me my parents reaction was better than his. Two different stories but the veiled thoughts that they both reached out are real. So please, call him. Ask your Mom if Brother can stay with you for a few days to relax. He's a kid so put him on the couch if you can, he will love you for it.

[Deleted]

Update? Did you talk to your brother?

[bornbaker]

Aug 2, 2013 8:07:40 GMT -5 hungrycaterpillar said:

Update? Did you talk to your brother?

I did (I posted something last night, see above ) 

I'm going to check in tonight. 

[bornbaker]

Aug 2, 2013 8:09:52 GMT -5 @cse1960 said:

thinking of you and your brother, and hoping all is well.

Can he come stay with you for a couple of days? Just to detox?

Unfortunately, no. 

He has appointments and last minute things to do before college. He leaves next weekend! Only a week left! He's in the Marching Band, so he has to be there on the 12th (I think). 

[FluteCatT]

Aug 2, 2013 9:26:38 GMT -5 bornbaker said:

That's great--he'll have a built in social network that will (hopefully) help him with the transition to college!

My home life was crazy stressful in high school because of family issues, so I really thrived being on my own.  I hope it's the same for your brother.