If you're anti-belly touching, come in. :)

[sookie]

I realize to some people having their stomach touched is no big deal, but I really, really hate it. I mean, I didn't appreciate it before getting pregnant, so I don't see why I'd love the idea now.

My baby shower is over Labor Day weekend when I'll be just shy of 31 weeks pregnant and it'll be mostly family in attendance and/or people I haven't seen since I've had the belly. Is there a way to politely get the point across that I'm not ok with touching short of wearing this shirt:


Am I just going to have to get over this?

[Stingyshark]

I have also had major issues w/ my stomach being touched. Prior to getting pregnant i even hated for H to touch it, ick. Now I don't care about H, but it squicks me out for other people.. someone did rub it yesterday and I maintained composure, but I was not thrilled.

DH's family & my family know better than to even think about it.. I'm not sure how to address other people.. I will probably end up sucking it up - unless they just catch me on a bad day and I go off ...

[nomad]

I'm just curious, how common is it for people to come up and touch your belly? I don't care if people touch it if I'm feeling ok but no one has touched my belly without asking first and I can only think of for sure 2 people that have asked there might have been 3. Maybe I'm just lucky?

[Stingyshark]

I don't know how common it is for strangers - but I know my family & DH's family and none of them would have any issues with getting up in my space uninvited.

[sookie]

Aug 4, 2013 10:42:20 GMT -5 nomad said:

I'm just curious, how common is it for people to come up and touch your belly? I don't care if people touch it if I'm feeling ok but no one has touched my belly without asking first and I can only think of for sure 2 people that have asked there might have been 3. Maybe I'm just lucky?

I've had two people attempt it with 1 of them successful because I was caught off-guard and didn't realize it was coming. The second time I anticipated it and casually moved my body to avoid it. It's pretty well known in my circle that I don't like it and will likely back away if you do try it, but I haven't found how to address it with people who don't necessarily know I'm against it.

ETA: The people who have tried are people I know. I haven't had a stranger do it.

[sookie]

Aug 4, 2013 10:48:54 GMT -5 Stingyshark said:

I don't know how common it is for strangers - but I know my family & DH's family and none of them would have any issues with getting up in my space uninvited.

That's my thing. Because they're family I can see them trying it, and I don't want to be rude or for someone to think I'm being mean, but I just really don't like it. To be fair, I'm not a fan of people touching me in general outside of a handshake or a quick hug (no rubbing my shoulders unless we're married or I'm paying you, no patting my arm, etc). 

[Stingyshark]

Aug 4, 2013 10:51:17 GMT -5 sookie said:

Aug 4, 2013 10:48:54 GMT -5 Stingyshark said:

I don't know how common it is for strangers - but I know my family & DH's family and none of them would have any issues with getting up in my space uninvited.

That's my thing. Because they're family I can see them trying it, and I don't want to be rude or for someone to think I'm being mean, but I just really don't like it. To be fair, I'm not a fan of people touching me in general outside of a handshake or a quick hug (no rubbing my shoulders unless we're married or I'm paying you, no patting my arm, etc). 

I feel similarly; but DH's family are big into hugging, so I've had to adjust to that.  Thankfully I am barely showing (according to practically everyone but me) so no one has tried anything yet. I don't see H's family on the regular, and my Mom is well aware that she should proceed with caution. 

Yesterday we were at the beach w/ some of my Mom's friends and the youngest girl (6) put her head on my belly several times to "try and hear" the baby.. Her mom instructed her to do so... I let it happen, bc she's 6..and it's not her fault her Mom is an idiot... but later my Mom was like, "were you okay w/ that?"  uhm no, but what can I do. I'm not going to make the kid cry. 

[snickers]

lol
People have at least asked me first. I don't mind as long as I know them and they ask first, but I don't really understand why they want to touch someone else's belly anyways considering she isn't always kicking and never has when someone has asked to do feel lol.

[Cheesecake]

I fortunately haven't had many people touch the bump yet. A couple of my (70 and older) aunts at a family reunion and my oldest friend who's cared for me in the hospital when I was really really sick before DH and I got together.
Those were unasked.and while it was slightly uncomfortable, I expected it and was prepared.

Besides that just DH, my doctor and a very close friend who always asks.

I would totally wear that shirt if I'd know I'd bein a situation where I think people might start touching.

Sent from my Xperia Z, please don't mind typos!

[rex]

I hate it so much. At my shower yesterday people kept doing it even when I told them I didn't like it.

[vmars]

DH's uncle touched my belly at 14 weeks and said "I want to feel the baby move" LOL I told him I can't feel the baby move and walked away. He meant well and has some health problems so I gave him a pass, but it was super awkward. A good family friend asked to touch the bump, I said okay, and then he got so nervous, tapped it quick and it was over. My family tries to sneak a pat in too. I think I'd rather someone ask if they can feel the bump instead of just touching it. Generally I don't care so long as it is friend/family, but strangers - no way!

[sweetminnesnowtan]

I fucking want this shirt.

I don't like it either. The only person I like touching my belly is my husband. My mom does it and has just been weird about it lately, because she rests her head on my stomach trying to get him to kick her. Drives me fucking batty because it's already uncomfortable with a 3 pound fetus pushing on my bladder or on my ribs.  I get she's excited because it's her first grandchild, but she's wearing on my nerves with it. My MIL is a little weird about it too but at least I don't see her as much. My sister does it sometimes, and she just puts a finger on it lol. Like do you really expect to feel a kick with one finger? And no matter, just stop.

Mostly though, people are good about not touching my stomach, so that makes me happy.

[halfpint]

No one touches me. Well, one person did, and it was weird, because it was at work. And she was an employment lawyer. During a break in harassment free workplace training.

I think I must have good bitchface. I have seen people kind of make a move like they might want to reach out for a rub, but then they stop. I think my body language says back the eff off. Even my mom won't touch without an invitation.