OB/midwife options

[bananapancakes]

I know I need to make a decision soon so I need to talk this out and seek other opinions. WWYD if you were me?

Option 1- OB in my town
-really bad online reviews
-she did my D&C and while I appreciated her ability to squeeze me in and take care of me quickly, I was not impressed with her bedside manner
-did not feel comfortable with her
-delivers at hospital less than 5 minutes from my house

Option 2- midwife practice near my town (less than 30 minutes)
-office is 30 minutes away but two midwives see patients at hospital less than 5 minutes from my house
-can deliver at home or at hospital
-this was my original practice when I was first pregnant last time but they didn't want to see me until I was 10 weeks
-when I informed them that I was spotting, they told me to go to the walk-in clinic as they couldn't do anything for me
-I never did have my first appointment with them as I was miscarrying by then so they cancelled the appointment and I dealt with OB from above
-they were supportive on the phone but I kind of feel like I got the shaft from them even though I understand that there was little they could do for me

Option 3- partners in pregnancy practice in town where I work (40 minutes away)
-full service pregnancy practice with several OBs, dietitians, social workers, lactation consultants, nurses/nurse practitioners
-have services such as Nausea and Vomiting Clinic, a Miscarriage Care Plan, Lactation Consultant and Postpartum Support Group 
-deliver at hospital 40 minutes away

Option 4- midwife practice in town where I work (40 minutes away)
-very "mother focused"
-see a variety of midwives throughout pregnancy and 2 will attend birth
-can deliver at home, hospital 40 minutes away or in their birthing suite at the clinic

To add complication to these choices is my H's RCMP thing again. We don't have any real sense of timeline so he could be gone September-March or October-April or some other combination. If he does go, I will be alone for most of these appointments and perhaps birth as well. There is also a possibility that if he goes to training, I will move to town where I work (options 3 and 4) but this is not for sure as of yet.

I need to call soon. WWYD?

[soozy87]

3 or 4

[Ohhmm(bligo)]

Definitely 3 or 4.

[Deleted]

Aug 6, 2013 10:36:35 GMT -5 @stpete said:

I would probably go with option 3 or 4. The first two don't sounds like people I would be comfortable with.

Ditto.

We moved farther away from my OB, MFM, and the hospital they both delivered with when I was just about 30 wks pregnant, maybe 32.  It was about 40 minutes from home without traffic.  It really isn't that bad.  You will have the pregnancy to find the fastest route.  We used every single appt (and I was going every week at that point I think, at least once a week) to find the fastest route and then stuck with it.

The two times I ended up in L&D before being induced were in the middle of the night and early morning.  I was lucky that the "real" time I was induced but still.  It isn't so bad.

[bananapancakes]

@booby, yes I'm Canadian so cost isn't a factor. All options are included with OHIP. 

I know that it is normal to not be seen until 10 weeks so I don't really hold it against option 2, I just thought they could do something, YKWIM? I just felt kind of abandoned.

[papie]

I would not do 3 or 4. Delivering 40 minutes away would be a nightmare for me.

[papie]

Aug 6, 2013 10:42:37 GMT -5 bananapancakes said:

@booby, yes I'm Canadian so cost isn't a factor. All options are included with OHIP. 

I know that it is normal to not be seen until 10 weeks so I don't really hold it against option 2, I just thought they could do something, YKWIM? I just felt kind of abandoned.

Meh,  my OB practice did the same thing to me,  they said to go to the ER.  I called my GP and cried and he was awesome and saw me right away and gave me a prescription for an ultrasound.  Once I knew I m/c, I called the OB practice back and they saw me within a week. 

[wambam]

Agree with PP, options 3 or 4, with preference for 3 ONLY because of the uncertainty with your H. I am very pro-midwife, but if you don't have your H with you, it sounds like you'll get a lot of support from option 3.

[bananapancakes]

I had a friend who used option 3 and she had nothing but great things to say.

We only live in the town we do right now because it is sort of half way between where I work and my H works. If he goes to RCMP training soon, I am likely going to move to "town where I work" in order to save me from commuting in crazy winter weather. That would mean that I would be living in the town for options 3 and 4 and could very well be living in that town when I deliver. This is not for sure though which makes the decision difficult.

[ax2]

I went to PIPC and they were great. I had a really great experience with them.

And its cool that you work in my town. :-)

Eta: I realize this isn't wildly helpful. If you have any questions about my experience with them, feel free to ask.

[overture]

I would choose 3 or 4. Probably 4.

I delivered 30+ minutes away. Not a big deal. If you're in labor, you'll probably have to have someone drive you to the hospital, regardless of whether it's 5 minutes or 40 minutes away.

[bananapancakes]

Aug 6, 2013 10:55:27 GMT -5 ax2 said:

I went to PIPC and they were great. I had a really great experience with them.

And its cool that you work in my town. :-)

I'm going to PM you!

[Deleted]

Personally, I would choose option 2.

Like booby, I wouldn't be annoyed by #2, but if you feel it's not a good fit for you, then I say 4.

[Deleted]

Lol, yeah...I live 30 minutes from the hospital and that was a LONG FUCKING RIDE. Should have just birthed at home.

[christy082]

3 or 4. While being able to deliver close to your home is convenient, you need to be comfortable with your practitioner.  

[BaliHai]

Option 3.

[Kristinmo]

I would start with 2. Meet with them and see how you feel. If you still feel eh about it, then try #3.

[ijack]

Do you have interest in birthing at home or not at a hospital? If you do then I'd pick #4? If you want to deliver at a hospital I'd pick #3 because those are some awesome services.
I've had both MW and an OB and I didn't find that there was a different level of care, it's mostly just about who you jive with the best.

[bananapancakes]

Aug 6, 2013 12:09:04 GMT -5 ijack said:

Do you have interest in birthing at home or not at a hospital? If you do then I'd pick #4? If you want to deliver at a hospital I'd pick #3 because those are some awesome services.
I've had both MW and an OB and I didn't find that there was a different level of care, it's mostly just about who you jive with the best.

I don't have any interest in birthing at home but I do like the idea of birthing in the birthing suite at the midwife clinic of option 4. 

[ijack]

I would probably go with #4 then, provided you meet them and they seem like people you'd get along with.

[TheSeaward]

is getting a referral from the hospital 5 minutes away an option

[cleo29]

3 or 4. You have to be comfortable not only with your OB but the other doctors in the practice. I love my OB/GYN and the practice as a whole and that made a huge difference. They never made me feel like any concern of mine was too small, especially given my fears after the miscarriages.  I can't stress that enough.  Check out all the possibilities and go with the one that you feel the best at.

[Deleted]

Option 3 or 4 sounds best to me. I personally prefer my doctor, his practice is like option 3 and I love it. Plus I had no interest in a home birth so it works well. I do like the option of a birth center though. And even if it's a bit of a drive you should have time to get there and get comfortable, and that wouldn't be a bad place to spend more time laboring. I was not a fan of laboring in the hospital (long story though)

If you were interested in a home birth I'd go for option 4, that said, try not to hold the miscarriage experience against them (and I'm very sorry you went through that), midwives have to be very careful to not appear to be withholding medical care or taking the place of a doctor in a medical "emergency". The guidelines for what they can and cannot do are very specific.

Also, I'm not sure if a midwife is different but my husband didn't come to any of my appointments except for ultrasounds, the first one to confirm the pregnancy (he had questions) and then when we heard the heartbeat. So I wouldn't worry too much about it.

If you're near Calgary, PM me and I can give you the name of the woman who taught our birth class and was extremely helpful. Their online resources are good too.

[orangeglow]

Personally I would do option 3 ( I like clinics and all that stuff ) seconded by 3.  The closest hospital I can go to is 35 mins away due to insurance.  I've gone that far with a kidney stone, so I am going to assume I can squeeze my legs for a baby too?  Idk.  

Whatever you choose, just know that 99% of the time you can switch if you hate them.

[sparkythelawyer]

No. 3.  No question.

[snickers]

I would be deciding between options 3 and 4, but I would lean heavily towards option 3. I like that they have a lot of groups, etc that will be there to help you if H does go away for work.

[Deleted]

Also, if you plan to breastfeed and have problems, or even just questions, it's super helpful to have the lactation consultant right there. And that's not easy to find either.

[DotAndBuzz]

#3

[mrssandro]

Option 2 or 4

I had a m/c with a midwife last time. So I know that really there is little they can do. She didn't have a working u/s machine so she really couldn't tell me if everything was okay. So she sent me off to a u/s place and that is where they informed I was m/c. The midwife did follow-up by phone and helped me find a doctor who could give me a d/c and do another follow-up appointment.

If I get a BFP I plan to go to to a the obgyn who my midwife referred me to. They had a great U/S machine in the office. Then I will likely switch back to that same midwife.

[VeryViolet]

If you like the idea of a midwife delivery I would go with option 4. Definitely I would choose 3 or 4 depending on your comfort level. I will say I go to an OB that is about 40 minutes from my house with no traffic (and there is rarely no traffic) and the hospital I will deliver at is the same distance or further. I have no problems with it. I love my OB and he could probably move his office further away and I would still go to him. Finding a doctor you like is really important especially when dealing with pregnancy because you already feel so vulnerable, emotional, etc.