Extracurricular activities?

[Bernadine]

How involved should step-parents be?  If FI is there, should I be there?  BM's FI is always at practices and games.  I have been so far, because it's only been once/week.  Football just started, and it's 3 nights per week, which just seems like a lot.  In no way do I mean to be in some kind of step-parent competition with BM's FI, I just don't want fss to feel like he's any less important to me.

[megapotomus]

This is an issue DH and I are facing. SS is 6 and in soccer and we have DS who's 10 months old. In the past BM and her BF and DH and I all show up, but the activities are getting more involved and more often and it's just not plausible for our family to show up all the time. Part of me feels like DH goes because BM goes no matter if it's their custody time or not, but I had to put my foot down this week and tell DH he is more than welcome to go but I have to get DS in bed since soccer starts at the same time his bed time is.

My advice is do what's best for you, if you and your FI can make it great! If not, don't pressure yourself. In a "normal" family there's lots of times mom and dad aren't both there, so it shouldn't be any different. 

[CurlyQ284]

I don't get why parents stay during practice. That's a lot of time sitting on the sidelines! I don't think I could commit to that and I would just explain that you'll be there as much as you can and you're proud of him.

[Bernadine]

Aug 7, 2013 9:24:39 GMT -5 CurlyQ284 said:

I don't get why parents stay during practice. That's a lot of time sitting on the sidelines! I don't think I could commit to that and I would just explain that you'll be there as much as you can and you're proud of him.

I imagine it's because they're young, and it will lessen over time.  The boys in the field behind us were probably middle school age, and there weren't nearly as many parents there.  Really only a few.

[CurlyQ284]

Oh OK. I remember my brother playing competitive baseball and we were always at the field and that was just games. I can't imagine practices too.

[Chocolate Chip]

Do whatever works for you. I know that sounds like a non-answer, but you are right, it's not a competition. I would think the games are more important than the practices, right?

I'm step-mom and a bio-mom, so I have a fair amount of juggling to do between kids activities. I tried to do it all and just ran myself to death. I finally realized I was not going to be super-step mom, forgave myself, and did the best I could. I made sure I attended the important things (actual games, competitions, etc.) and left the practices to DH and BM.

[Deleted]

H and I handle all of the running around for extracurriculars during our time and go to all games and competitions that we can make it to when she is with her mom. We don't generally go to any practices during her mom's time though.

[SusanBAnthony]

Dude, I cannot wait until do is old enough to just drop off for practices. He is almost six and I think I am almost there. N way does more than one parent, let alone step parents, need to be there for practices.