The need to feel liked....

[mrsjason]

So there is this girl, she lives right down the street from me and she is cousins with one of our BFFs in Texas. We have known her for about 10 years now and we are really close with her family. At Christmas time we eat Christmas dinner with them, we are invited to all the kids birthdays, every back-yard BBQ, etc.

She use to invite us over when the parties happened at her house and she even came on a few summer vacations with us many years ago. I wouldn't consider us close friends, just someone who you would always remember to invite when something was going on.

She got married back in 2008 and I thought it was weird that we didn't get an invite to the wedding when a) we were friends with the groom, prior to her dating him and b) it was a big wedding and everyone invited except us (including people who didn't know the couple as well as us). Eh, but whatever, I didn't put too much thought into it.

Then she got pregnant and had a daughter 2 months after I had Macy. I was never invited to her baby shower. We have never been invited to any of her daughter's birthday parties.

Come Christmas, when she hosts Christmas Eve dinner at her house we are never invited when we had been invited previous years.

We always invite them over when we BBQ, birthday parties, holidays and they never show, nor do we ever receive any response back.

It's weird, because when I do see her at events, she is nice, we have a conversation and I think "well, maybe we will be invited to a party at her house". Nope. Communication is dead.

She has changed since getting married. Her H is one of the nicest guys I know, but his family is rich. Like stupid rich. Like 10s of millions of dollars rich. But you would never know it meeting them. Very nice, very welcoming, and very down to Earth. This girl, has become a snob. She has kinda lost touch with reality and money. I mean, her family is fairly well off (not as rich as her H's family) but they do well so I don't really understand the change in her.

Honestly, she really isn't someone I would want to be friends with but I notice when I am around her I try to get her to like me. Ha. Why? I am not sure, but I think it's my need to feel liked. I really want to ask her "why don't you like me anymore? What did I do?" Haha.

Does anyone else act this way when they don't feel liked by someone? Or have I reverted back to my High School self?!

[moonstone523]

I don't think it's something wrong with you. I think something is up with her.

This is just odd. Someone who went on vacations with you, ate Christmas dinner with you, and then didn't invite you to their wedding, parties at their house, etc. with NO explanation or falling out.

I'd start there after a few beers and be like, "Dude. What the hell happened? We used to hang out, go on vacays, etc and then you stopped inviting us places or coming to our parties when we invited you? Is everything okay?"

[lauren9317]

I've felt the same way in certain situations. Especially when someone seems to dislike me for NO reason, which seems to be the case in your situation!

You should ask her what's up! A friend of mine (she was even one of my bridesmaids) stopped communicating with me for seemingly no reason. She had always been a very good friend and then she just... stopped. I finally emailed and asked her why she never talked to me anymore. It felt good putting her on the spot, if not a little awkward, but it was worth it.

[mrsjason]

I probably should ask her, but I am afraid to look like it bothers me, LOL.

Maybe one of these days I will will up the nerve to ask her. Although I am not sure when that will be see I hardly ever see her anymore.

Glad to know I am not the only one who has a need to be liked

[jen812]

Why are you afraid to look like it bothers you? I would rather people think that way of me rather than thinking I didn't care or was indifferent. Maybe something's going on with her that you are unaware of.

[lauren9317]

I agree with Jen. When someone wrongs me, I WANT them to know that they wronged me, you know? Maybe I am just bitter like that, haha. When I confronted the friend I mentioned, I could tell that she respected that I had the balls to call her out. I think your friend should be the one to feel uncomfortable, not you!