Why are gender disappointment posts always about b

[bronxgirl]

Jun 23, 2012 15:24:59 GMT -5 jenny1980 said:

Jun 23, 2012 14:35:31 GMT -5 Willis Jackson said:

Try 4 or 5 MONTHS.

I think the biggest surprise about having a boy has been all the penis talk. Who has one, who doesn't, where he is allowed to touch his (ftr: his room and the bathroom), etc.

The other day DS said, out of the blue, "I have a little tiny penis. Daddy has a REALLY BIG, FURRY penis." Thank god we weren't in public.

LOL.

Girls do this too, though. Lucy talks about her vagina all.the.time.

"Mama has hair on HER vagina! I do NOT!!!!" And Daddy doesn't HAVE a vagina!" And yes, of course it's always in public LOL.

Lucy sounds like a lot of the MMers in the waxing thread.

[Deleted]

I was shocked when the U/S tech said we were having a boy. It really never crossed my realm of possibility that I might have a boy. I grew up in a large family with only sisters. I wasn't disappointed though. Now, not that I'm going to, but if I went for another, I'd want a boy.

[Saudade]

I wanted a boy. I didn't, and still don't, want a girl. I don't know how to be girly and I don't have a wonderful relationship with my mom. So glad I got a boy.

WRT the circumcision and pee, DH was always on board with not circ-ing and DS has not yet peed on anyone or across the room or at all during a diaper change. We've been lucky!

He does, however, get quite a few erections.

[Deleted]

Jun 23, 2012 17:58:20 GMT -5 jenny1980 said:

Jun 23, 2012 17:02:33 GMT -5 @septimus said:

I was shocked when the U/S tech said we were having a boy. It really never crossed my realm of possibility that I might have a boy. I grew up in a large family with only sisters. I wasn't disappointed though. Now, not that I'm going to, but if I went for another, I'd want a boy.

I am still bummed your screen name will never be true.

Traveling with 4 put a damper on that... it is so dang expensive.

[MadamePresident]

Jun 23, 2012 14:35:31 GMT -5 Willis Jackson said:

Jun 23, 2012 12:59:16 GMT -5 madringal said:

I got totally skewed out when my sister told me her boys starting getting erections as young as 4 or 5. Very thankful for my two girls, pink explosions and all. Oh, and American Girl is one of the reasons I WANTED girls.

Try 4 or 5 MONTHS.

I think the biggest surprise about having a boy has been all the penis talk. Who has one, who doesn't, where he is allowed to touch his (ftr: his room and the bathroom), etc.

The other day DS said, out of the blue, "I have a little tiny penis. Daddy has a REALLY BIG, FURRY penis." Thank god we weren't in public.

This is too funny. I read it to my DH and he laughed as well.

[cjeanette]

Jun 23, 2012 10:17:32 GMT -5 @hannamarin said:

See the poopy diaper thing seems gross for boys. All those testicle wrinkles. My girlfriends and I were discussing it. I also think it is not a big deal for me to separate a vagina because .i have one, but I am always worried that I might hurt the testicle, penis, etc

Boys are easier. Less places for poop to end up....

[birdmom]

Jun 23, 2012 10:42:52 GMT -5 karinothing said:

Jun 23, 2012 10:17:32 GMT -5 @hannamarin said:

See the poopy diaper thing seems gross for boys. All those testicle wrinkles. My girlfriends and I were discussing it. I also think it is not a big deal for me to separate a vagina because .i have one, but I am always worried that I might hurt the testicle, penis, etc

ha ha. Babies don't have huge testicle wrinkles! This makes me giggle. You just wipe it like you wipe normal skin DS doesn't have really chubby legs so I can't speak to poo getting stuck in his leg folds.

After I saw DS hit himself and pull his penis I realized that there is pretty much not much I could do to hurt it.

I couldn't believe how far that thing stretches! When DS pulled on it and started laughing, I just about died!

[nickyd2006]

I was pretty sure DD1 was a boy, then found out she was a girl and got pretty excited about the girly stuff. Then when we got pg with #2, I was really hoping for a boy so DH could continue his Greek family name. We definitely feel the pressure to have a boy. We actually did another gender cake get together without his family there in case it was another girl. It is another girl, so we just sent his family cards saying it was a girl with an U/S pic inside. Let's just say I didn't get a call from his parents... We may just let BIL try his luck for a boy when he settles down again.

[SusanBAnthony]

We talk about vulvas and peens all day long. T says as we walk down the street: he has a penis. She has a vulva, on and on. She is right about 70% of the time.

The other night at bedtime, T was freaking out and she finally calmed down and told me she was upset bc her vulva was stinky. Confused. Just confused. She has never heard me say that, where did it come from?

W walked up to me while I was eating breakfast yesterday and said "mommy, do you have an itchy bum?" no. Ok. Where does this stuff come from? Do they just sit around and think about their crotches all the time? Because it seems like it!

But back to the original question, I had a lot of disappointment that ds was a boy. I don't care about girls girl stuff at all, but I wanted the adult female relationship, and I wanted a chance to have Frankie's from my daughter, not as a mil. Of course dd may not have kids, and that is fine. Now if we get pg with a it'd, I would like another girl just for convenience of sharing bedrooms and saving clothes, etc. I would rather not have two boys, 5.5 yrs apart, sharing a room, but we will not likely have more than a 3 bedroom house.

[oregonpachey]

Jun 23, 2012 14:35:31 GMT -5 Willis Jackson said:

Jun 23, 2012 12:59:16 GMT -5 madringal said:

I got totally skewed out when my sister told me her boys starting getting erections as young as 4 or 5. Very thankful for my two girls, pink explosions and all. Oh, and American Girl is one of the reasons I WANTED girls.

Try 4 or 5 MONTHS.

I think the biggest surprise about having a boy has been all the penis talk. Who has one, who doesn't, where he is allowed to touch his (ftr: his room and the bathroom), etc.

The other day DS said, out of the blue, "I have a little tiny penis. Daddy has a REALLY BIG, FURRY penis." Thank god we weren't in public.

::Looks around::

I think there must be something wrong with my boys because they have gotten erections since birth. Is this not normal?

[beaver12]

Jun 23, 2012 12:59:16 GMT -5 madringal said:

I got totally skewed out when my sister told me her boys starting getting erections as young as 4 or 5. Very thankful for my two girls, pink explosions and all. Oh, and American Girl is one of the reasons I WANTED girls.

My 11 month old gets erections. He totally gets morning wood. Not a big deal.

I had mild GD with my first because I wanted a boy. I always though I'd be a better mom to boys and had some stupid insecurities about the possibility of a very tall daughter (DH is 6'7" and I'm 6'). Now I think I'm extremely lucky to have one of each and wouldn't trade a thing!

[chance22010]

We have a boy and when we found out it was another I sighed a huge sigh of relief. I think raising a girl in our society is so challenging. Dh wanted a girl so I was preparing myself for all these future conversations about self esteem, media stereotypes, etc. Boys need the same conversations but to a lesser extent.

Honestly other than that boys and girls are so interchangeable. There's nothing special I would do with a daughter I wouldn't do with a son and vice versa. But then again I wasn't the type of girl who liked dolls so I am loving not having any dolls in the house

[interro]

I do think a lot of women - a lot of women I know, anyway - dream of having a little mini-me. I dread the idea of a teenage girl because of what a moody little snatch I was. But since Mr. Bang has a son and neither of us really want more than 2 children total, I will probably feel a little bummed no matter what gender our hypothetical future kid is. Only because that's the only bio kid I will have, so if I have a girl I'll never have a boy, and vice versa.

[GailGoldie]

i can't tell you how many times a month I say "thank God we don't have any girls".... shit- i AM a girl and I know what we are like- and i'm quite satisfied that we don't have to deal with that in our kids

we would have liked to have one girl- but there was very little disappointment when we found out teh twins were 2 boys... I felt bad for DH that he wouldn't get his "daddy's girl" but other than that - was over it in about 4 seconds.

I LOVE being the mom of 3 boys and can't imagine it any other way.

and i'm so glad we don't have pink plastic shit all over our house

[bronxgirl]

In regards to all the comments about girls= dolls, boys= no dolls, I think some people need to watch a loop tape of "William Has a Doll" from Free to Be You and Me until they get the idea that boys can and should have dolls, too. It's a normal part of developmental play ans exploration.

[Deleted]

Jun 24, 2012 9:20:46 GMT -5 bronxgirl said:

In regards to all the comments about girls= dolls, boys= no dolls, I think some people need to watch a loop tape of "William Has a Doll" from Free to Be You and Me until they get the idea that boys can and should have dolls, too. It's a normal part of developmental play ans exploration.

My boys all had a doll, that they carried for about 3 mos around age 2. It had a hard head, arms and legs but a soft belly. Even at 4, almost 6 and 7 they have their stuffed animals they travel the world with us.

[Willis Jackson]

DS tries to breastfeed his doll. He also tries to breastfeed his trucks, his peanut butter sandwich, etc.

[beaver12]

Jun 24, 2012 9:20:46 GMT -5 bronxgirl said:

In regards to all the comments about girls= dolls, boys= no dolls, I think some people need to watch a loop tape of "William Has a Doll" from Free to Be You and Me until they get the idea that boys can and should have dolls, too. It's a normal part of developmental play ans exploration.

One day he is going to be a father too!!!!

I love Free To Be You and Me. My Mom gave the CD to DD and we listen to it all the time.

[Brie]

Jun 24, 2012 10:06:54 GMT -5 Willis Jackson said:

DS tries to breastfeed his doll. He also tries to breastfeed his trucks, his peanut butter sandwich, etc.

Your kids sound like a hoot!

[anna7602]

Jun 24, 2012 9:20:46 GMT -5 bronxgirl said:

In regards to all the comments about girls= dolls, boys= no dolls, I think some people need to watch a loop tape of "William Has a Doll" from Free to Be You and Me until they get the idea that boys can and should have dolls, too. It's a normal part of developmental play ans exploration.

I get what you're saying, but honestly, even the boys I know who played with dolls & doll strollers as small kids (ages 1-3) have outgrown them by now (age 4 & up). Some will still have fun playing dress-up with DD when they come for play dates (if their parents are cool with the wearing of heeled shoes and whatnot), but the boys' eyes practically glaze over when DD gushes on and on about Angelina Ballerina and her American Girl dolls. I am friends with some pretty crunchy/anti-gender stereotype women who have made it a point to expose their boys to everything and their AG collection ends with the Bitty Baby/Bitty Twins and they never really got into all the related accessories. None of their boys has ever, ever been interested in spending hours at the AG store by Rockefeller Center the way DD has.

[sawyerthedestroyer]

Meh, having a boy doesn't preclude anyone from dolls, princesses, pink, or teen pregnancy.

And ditto the comfort zone comments. I was comfortable with the idea of a girl because I am a girl. I got over it.

[starlily]

Looking around my living room and I see one pink plastic toy out of the dozen toys or so in here.

I was wary of having a girl. My mom was never a warm & fuzzy type and my teen years weren't pleasant due to Mean Girls.

But I am thrilled to have DD. I am hopeful that she will have an easier time if things than I did & that our relationship will be different. Yes, I enjoy buying adorable clothes & shoes and hope she'll share some of my hobbies.

Also (and potentially flammable), even though I know my brother has always been my mom's favorite, my mom (and many of her friends) has always said that having a daughter is a blessing for the family. It wasn't until the past few years, dealing with aging parents and a death in the family (and talking to people in the same boat), that I began to understand what she meant by that. I don't expect my kid(s) to take care of me when I'm old, but I feel that if I do need help, a daughter its more apt to give it.

[Deleted]

Jun 23, 2012 7:58:18 GMT -5 vanillacourage said:

Every time I watch Teen Mom or pass that awful American Girl store at the mall I thank my lucky stars I have two boys and will never have to deal with that shit!

I just saw an AG store for the first time yesterday, and this one even has a restaurant!

Immediately I thought holy shit, is this what my DD will want in five years?? ???Thank God we live two hours away from that place.

[Deleted]

Jun 23, 2012 8:14:53 GMT -5 Becca said:

And to answer the original question, I think a lot of moms always dream of having a little mini-me that they can dress in cute outfits and turn into a shopping buddy.

This is how my boss reacted when I told her I was ghaving a girl. She said "Oh, that great!!!! You can dress her up in all kinds of cute stuff!!!"

Yeah boss, that's why I had two IVFs. So I could have a live Barbie doll.

[shell403b]

I am SO HAPPY E is a boy. I don't think I'd deal well with the female-teenage-angst.

[slug*bug]

Jun 24, 2012 12:13:40 GMT -5 shell403b said:

I am SO HAPPY E is a boy. I don't think I'd deal well with the female-teenage-angst.

It's true. I'm a little afraid of the middle school years w/DD: no matter how close we are to our moms now, I think all of my girlfriends had rough patches w/our moms as teenagers.

[GailGoldie]

Jun 24, 2012 11:12:41 GMT -5 starlily said:

I don't expect my kid(s) to take care of me when I'm old, but I feel that if I do need help, a daughter its more apt to give it.

see, that is just silly. Men take care of their aging parents just as much as women do.

My husband is the youngest of 6 kids - all boys and one girl. He is the one that takes the most care of his mom who is very ill... and his one brother is 2nd in "command" as well.

[starlily]

Jun 24, 2012 15:23:05 GMT -5 GailGoldie said:

Jun 24, 2012 11:12:41 GMT -5 starlily said:

I don't expect my kid(s) to take care of me when I'm old, but I feel that if I do need help, a daughter its more apt to give it.

see, that is just silly. Men take care of their aging parents just as much as women do.

My husband is the youngest of 6 kids - all boys and one girl. He is the one that takes the most care of his mom who is very ill... and his one brother is 2nd in "command" as well.

You could think it's silly; makes no difference to me. But I still stand by opinion, based on what I've been through the past year, and in talking to numerous other people.

[Deleted]

We're having our first, a girl, in November. We found out the sex last week. I'm actually still working through my disappointment (god typing that feels so flame worthy!). I have a sister, and out of 22 cousins, only 3 are boys. I think I'd do better parenting a little boy. And I'm terrified of re-living middle school with her; ugh. First periods, image issues, etc. but, I do appreciate that having an adult daughter will be a pretty cool thing. And seeing my DH with a daughter will be heart-melting. I'll get over it, but I'll also admit to hoping our 2nd is a boy.

[bronxgirl]

Jun 24, 2012 11:00:04 GMT -5 anna7602 said:

Jun 24, 2012 9:20:46 GMT -5 bronxgirl said:

In regards to all the comments about girls= dolls, boys= no dolls, I think some people need to watch a loop tape of "William Has a Doll" from Free to Be You and Me until they get the idea that boys can and should have dolls, too. It's a normal part of developmental play ans exploration.

I get what you're saying, but honestly, even the boys I know who played with dolls & doll strollers as small kids (ages 1-3) have outgrown them by now (age 4 & up). Some will still have fun playing dress-up with DD when they come for play dates (if their parents are cool with the wearing of heeled shoes and whatnot), but the boys' eyes practically glaze over when DD gushes on and on about Angelina Ballerina and her American Girl dolls. I am friends with some pretty crunchy/anti-gender stereotype women who have made it a point to expose their boys to everything and their AG collection ends with the Bitty Baby/Bitty Twins and they never really got into all the related accessories. None of their boys has ever, ever been interested in spending hours at the AG store by Rockefeller Center the way DD has.

I am not surprised that little boys don't want to shop at American Girl. I was taking about dolls in general.