Post by starburst604 on Oct 9, 2013 16:19:56 GMT -5
You aren't crazy, my experience has been that a lot of people who describe themselves as "sarcastic" are often just deflecting, or using it as a way to say something unkind and pass it off as "just being sarcastic, don't be so sensitive". It's a quality that drives me nuts.
I think you're being over sensitive, but it's hard for me to judge based on the example above which doesn't seem sarcastic to me at all. It sounds like you are seeking validation and assurance to confirm that he is interested in you. It seems he's just being light-hearted and a little flirty and you are looking for a more concrete, serious "yes I like you/had a great time/liked kissing you."
I think you're being over sensitive, but it's hard for me to judge based on the example above which doesn't seem sarcastic to me at all. It sounds like you are seeking validation and assurance to confirm that he is interested in you. It seems he's just being light-hearted and a little flirty and you are looking for a more concrete, serious "yes I like you/had a great time/liked kissing you."
Hmm, bad example maybe then... they're just the ones that annoy me the most. It's every.single.thing that gets a sarcastic response when it comes to flirty talk or anything. Like "Eh, I don't know. I miiiiight be able to see you again." But not actually setting up the time and date to do it. But in our serious discussion, I know he IS interested in me, this is not a case of "He's just not that into you." It's a case of his sarcasm being so strong that it ends up looking like mixed signals.
I still see the above as just flirty and more tongue in cheek than sarcastic. Is this all through text? I can sometimes be a totally awkward texter.
I think you are being overly sensitive but I am also a very sarcastic person. I think a lot of people use sarcasm to avoid putting themself out there too much and avoid getting hurt.
Sometimes it easier to joke than just give a straight answer. kwim?
Sarcasm can be fun, and I prefer a woman with a sarcastic sense of humor...but sarcasm all the time and using it as a means to avoid stuff would get old quick.
My BF and I are pretty sarcastic like he would totally send back "eh it's alright" to a sexy pic, but I know him and it would make me laugh and I know he meant you look super hot. We've also had more serious discussions about our feelings though. Overall it's only been three dates and I think you might be looking for too much "feelings" after such a short time. Is he sarcastic when you are just having a normal convo about say photography?
I would cry if I sent naked photos to a guy and he was like "eh, they're alright." NOPE. Time to turn that sarcasm shit OFF and compliment me.
Hold up. Did that happen?! If so, dude is BLLLLLLIIIIIIINNNNNNDDDDDDD and likely not even human. I'm sorry to say you've been dating a goat. That must be awkward.
OMFG I just spit on my screen. I am rolling at that gem!
Hold up. Did that happen?! If so, dude is BLLLLLLIIIIIIINNNNNNDDDDDDD and likely not even human. I'm sorry to say you've been dating a goat. That must be awkward.
An in person comment was made in a similar fashion - I shut that shit down. You do not say my ass is just alright - even if you're joking. LOL. That's a sure fire way to not see it again.
Hmmmm, has he ever given you an unsolicited compliment?
Hmmmm, has he ever given you an unsolicited compliment?
One or two, he's seen me naked and I think the best compliment I've gotten was about my vag. Which is nice, don't get me wrong, but I'd like a comment about my face or something, too.
Hmmmm, has he ever given you an unsolicited compliment?
One or two, he's seen me naked and I think the best compliment I've gotten was about my vag. Which is nice, don't get me wrong, but I'd like a comment about my face or something, too.
What?? Was this the first time he saw you naked?? This dude sounds like he is playing the game where he tries to make you want him more by pretending like he is not that into you...maybe you should tell him that tactic may have worked on you in 9th grade.
I think I'm totally guilty of spewing too much sarcasm...and I'm also self aware enough to know it's a defense mechanism. I'm cringing that I might have made someone feel crappy unintentionally.
I think I'm totally guilty of spewing too much sarcasm...and I'm also self aware enough to know it's a defense mechanism. I'm cringing that I might have made someone feel crappy unintentionally.
Damn right you have, just last week you said I was that creepy ginger in the awkward engagement photos thread. I may have pretended to take that as a compliment but truthfully I have been a wreck ever since. I haven't eaten in a week and have been watching a Jerry Springer marathon to feel better about myself. I will forgive, but never forget.
I'm one sarcastic fuck, but this guy sounds like he uses sarcasm for more than just a laugh. What next? He starts complaining that you're too needy because all you want is a genuine compliment? Blech.
ExH routinely hurt my feelings under the guise of sarcasm. Because he wasn't funny enough on his own; picking on me to get a laugh was par for the course. I digress.
I think I'm totally guilty of spewing too much sarcasm...and I'm also self aware enough to know it's a defense mechanism. I'm cringing that I might have made someone feel crappy unintentionally.
Damn right you have, just last week you said I was that creepy ginger in the awkward engagement photos thread. I may have pretended to take that as a compliment but truthfully I have been a wreck ever since. I haven't eaten in a week and have been watching a Jerry Springer marathon to feel better about myself. I will forgive, but never forget.
Like THAT is the meanest thing I've ever said to you
See, I am sarcastic, and H is sarcastic but it generally goes like this:
J:How do I look?
H: horrible... Just kidding! You look smoking hot! (beautiful, gorgeous, amazing, whatever).
And he doesn't pull that shit EVERY.SINGLE.TIME.
We say the sarcastic thing, but follow it up with a genuine compliment.
Yes! FWB sometimes says things that he even realizes as it's coming out of his mouth that he sounds like a dick, so he quickly recovers and calls himself out for sounding more dickish than his sarcasm intended.
I should also note-H and I did NOT make sarcastic comments about each other's appearance when first dating. H really only does it now when it's like the 4th time I ask him how I look. LOL.
Post by lyssbobiss, Command, B613 on Oct 9, 2013 19:51:15 GMT -5
I'm very much like you. I can be sarcastic and deadpan, and it is usually used to deflect or diffuse a situation that's uncomfortable for me. But it's just second nature to respond that way often. And usually I like it in a partner, but there are moments when I just genuinely want to hear something sincere, not sarcasm. If I say "thanks, you're the greatest" I don't always want to be met with "of course I am! You know this!" Just say thank you back, bro!
If I really need to hear something authentic, I'll ask for it.
"This prick is asking for someone here to bring him to task Somebody give me some dirt on this vacuous mass so we can at last unmask him I'll pull the trigger on it, someone load the gun and cock it While we were all watching, he got Washington in his pocket."
Uhh ya, I'd be pissed if someone I barely knew made a sarcastic comment about my ass. This is the time for ass worship.
I'm kind of curious what the vag compliment was....is that wrong?
I think a vag compliment is fine, as long as it isn't the ONLY sincere, no sarcastic compliment. I appreciate a compliment on my vag as much as the next chick.