Am I going to have to be all alone in defending cousin marriage here again? lol. (ftr, no I did not marry or want to marry one of my cousins.) Genetically it is not that big of a deal unless your family does it over and over.
Really? Didn't know that.
No. Sorry. Your family tree should be a tree. Not a wreath. Period.
given your update, you have HSV-1 --- the blood test will say whether he has it --- but VERY likely he could have had it since a child. no way the blood test will confirm that YOU gave it to him. scroll down to USA HSV-1 prevalence (from 2002 but nonetheless): jid.oxfordjournals.org/content/186/Supplement_1/S3/F8.expansion.html
How is that relevant or helpful? She had herpes and told him about it before they started dating. He is upset because he forgot. He gets tested. He has herpes and then she would be all "sorry honey you gave no proof I gave it to you. You probably already had it". It's her husband. Not a random dude suing her for herpes transmittal.
I'm sorry but I'm glad you talked. You mentioned your husband is a post whore? Drama whore? on facebook, so I'd imagine he might be the type to update his feelings all the time? If so, I guess I understand the facebook de-activing.
I'm still not sure how someone forgets their partner has herpes but perhaps if you are comfortable with your relationship and shove it to the back of your mind, you might forget? I don't know.
Pretty sure it was a second cousin. More distant than a first cousin for sure.
I am LOL that its MM that harbors the inbred. Because it is VERY MM to marry your cousin. Half as many wedding guests. Just one family to visit for holidays. Half as many funerals to attend.
Ignorant because........? Oh, I guess it's cool to potentially infect people as long as you've mentioned it in conversation in the past, before sleeping together was on the table? Or it doesn't need to be discussed because they're married so he doesn't have a choice anyway? Or do people think he isnt likely to ever get it from her, so she never needed to bring it up?
Okay, thanks to Google: Every couple that wishes to marry in Massachusetts must comply with a state's formal requirements. Only a few states require a blood test or a blood test and physical examination before marriage to show whether one party is infected with a venereal disease. In some statutes, for example, the clerk is forbidden to issue a marriage license until the parties present the results of the blood test.
Huh. I know I'm super late to the thread (always am) but I got married in 2004 in MA and don't recall a blood draw. Evidently it happened, since that's wha the law states had to have happened, I just don't remember. I guess I had other things to think of (we got our license Wed or Thurs and wedding was Sat, I was told we barely had license in time)
Back to original topic, after being married many years, I had a very abnormal pap, I have/had the hpv type that causes cancer, not outbreaks of blisters. It was removed very quickly in the OR
I almost fainted when I found out. I had to tell DH and I was convinced he'd hate me or something. He said "I'm sorry if I gave it to you"
Crack habit, I'm so so sorry this is happening to you. I can't imagine the confusion you must be feeling since you know you told him. I understand if he is nervous because he really forgot and is shocked now, but please, try not to allow yourself to feel like it's on you. It's not. You had the conversation, he forgot. It's on him. And truthfully, I hope he apologizes to you after the dust settles. You don't/didn't deserve to be treated poorly on account of having something that basically 1/4 people have. Good luck and huge hugs
Okay, thanks to Google: Every couple that wishes to marry in Massachusetts must comply with a state's formal requirements. Only a few states require a blood test or a blood test and physical examination before marriage to show whether one party is infected with a venereal disease. In some statutes, for example, the clerk is forbidden to issue a marriage license until the parties present the results of the blood test.
Huh. I know I'm super late to the thread (always am) but I got married in 2004 in MA and don't recall a blood draw. Evidently it happened, since that's wha the law states had to have happened, I just don't remember. I guess I had other things to think of (we got our license Wed or Thurs and wedding was Sat, I was told we barely had license in time)
Back to original topic, after being married many years, I had a very abnormal pap, I have/had the hpv type that causes cancer, not outbreaks of blisters. It was removed very quickly in the OR
I almost fainted when I found out. I had to tell DH and I was convinced he'd hate me or something. He said "I'm sorry if I gave it to you"
Crack habit, I'm so so sorry this is happening to you. I can't imagine the confusion you must be feeling since you know you told him. I understand if he is nervous because he really forgot and is shocked now, but please, try not to allow yourself to feel like it's on you. It's not. You had the conversation, he forgot. It's on him. And truthfully, I hope he apologizes to you after the dust settles. You don't/didn't deserve to be treated poorly on account of having something that basically 1/4 people have. Good luck and huge hugs
HPV doesn't cause blisters. High risk can lead to cervical cancer, hence the procedure, low risk can lead to genital warts. This is different than herpes, or HSV.
And agree with the PP who said the blood work may not be conclusive. Most people test positive for HSV. If he has ever had a cold sore in his life, he will test positive. Whether or not he has genital herpes can not be determined from blood work alone. If he has never had an outbreak in the genital region, then he likely does not genital herpes. Regardless, there's nothing to do about it unless he gets an outbreak. So even if he tests positive, so what? No outbreak, no problem.
Crackhabit, I was happy to read the update, and I hope things settle down there.
I don't think the average person realizes that when they request an STD screen, HSV is NOT included. You have to specifically request it, you have to make sure to request the CORRECT test (IGG), and you have to request to test for both HSV1 and HSV2.