Why are salads so hard to eat?

[noodleskooze]

All the toppings fall to the bottom, then you can't get most of them with a fork anyways. And how can you eat leaves of spinach politely?

If something isn't fun to eat, it should at least be easy!

/rant over.

[MWOS]

I just eat all the good shit on top. Eating leaves is for dinosaurs, and look what happened to them. SCIENCE.

[cleo29]

If it is from somewhere to go, I put the dressing on, put the lid back on and then give it a few good shakes. Everything gets nicely mixed up.

At home, I just take a fork and knife and mix everything up.

[dexteroni]

Nov 13, 2013 14:03:48 GMT -5 cleo29 said:

If it is from somewhere to go, I put the dressing on, put the lid back on and then give it a few good shakes.

This. The dressing helps sort of everything stick together a little better so you can get a good assorment of items in each forkful. But depending on the place, takeout salads can sometimes have a way-too-high lettuce-to-toppings proportion. When that's the case, I avoid shaking and just eat the toppings and the top half of the lettuce.

[looseseal]

LOL, lots of things are hard for ML. Salads, pants.

[MWOS]

once when I was tripping on mushrooms I flipped my shit because the idea of eating leaves really freaked me out. I mean, where does it end? Should I just go tear a branch off the oak tree outside and call it dinner? NOT OKAY.

[Deleted]

I ration the toppings as to make every bite have an equal amount of each ingredient.

I also make sure that when I am done I have one final sip of whatever I am drinking to wash it down.

[Deleted]

Chopped salad. BAM.

[TrickyBob]

Croutons are only acceptable to eat once they have soaked up the dressing and drifted to the bottom. I love eating the topping last.

[Deleted]

There is a salad bar near my office where you pick out all the toppings and then at the end they have people with giant knives that chop everything up and toss it together with dressing.

WALLA

[gault]

Nov 13, 2013 14:03:36 GMT -5 intentionalsnarkshark said:

Stock photos are totally lying to us about salads. Look at that smug bitch with her perfectly proportioned fork full of salad and toppings.

Dying.

Katherine Heigl, is that you in a wig?

[Booze Raccoon]

Nov 13, 2013 14:10:13 GMT -5 MWOS said:

once when I was tripping on mushrooms I flipped my shit because the idea of eating leaves really freaked me out. I mean, where does it end? Should I just go tear a branch off the oak tree outside and call it dinner? NOT OKAY.

The irony of you eating mushrooms to discover your discontent with eating leaves is not lost on me.

[sharknado]

Nov 13, 2013 14:26:32 GMT -5 @missusbee said:

There is a salad bar near my office where you pick out all the toppings and then at the end they have people with giant knives that chop everything up and toss it together with dressing.

WALLA

Like a freaking Cold Stone for salad? BRILLIANT!

[noodleskooze]

Nov 13, 2013 14:15:27 GMT -5 Lucy Honeychurch said:

I usually eat all the lettuce first, and then all the good stuff is left at the bottom of the bowl. lol.

This is my current M.O.

[noodleskooze]

Nov 13, 2013 14:34:06 GMT -5 kevin arnold said:

Who knew this thread would be entertaining?

At least my lunch has been good for something, because otherwise I would have considered it a total waste of my time!

[Deleted]

Nov 13, 2013 14:20:09 GMT -5 calamity said:

I ration the toppings as to make every bite have an equal amount of each ingredient.

I also make sure that when I am done I have one final sip of whatever I am drinking to wash it down.

This is a lot of work.

[bcv513]

This is why I'm fat: it's too hard to eat salad. Much easier to eat fries.

[bcv513]

Nov 13, 2013 14:26:32 GMT -5 @missusbee said:

There is a salad bar near my office where you pick out all the toppings and then at the end they have people with giant knives that chop everything up and toss it together with dressing.

WALLA

This actually sounds awesome. Do you mind sharing where it is?

[Deleted]

Also, I feel fancy when I make salads like this for lunch-

[spitforspat]

Salads- hard to eat, easy to toss.

[Deleted]

Nov 13, 2013 14:55:23 GMT -5 bcv513 said:

Nov 13, 2013 14:26:32 GMT -5 @missusbee said:

There is a salad bar near my office where you pick out all the toppings and then at the end they have people with giant knives that chop everything up and toss it together with dressing.

WALLA

This actually sounds awesome. Do you mind sharing where it is?

UDG in Downtown Crossing. 

[bcv513]

Nov 13, 2013 15:21:54 GMT -5 @missusbee said:

Nov 13, 2013 14:55:23 GMT -5 bcv513 said:

This actually sounds awesome. Do you mind sharing where it is?

UDG in Downtown Crossing. 

Thanks! That's not too far from me either.