I've been lurking

[awkwardpenguin]

But the board has been so slow.  I miss everyone.

I've been hanging out on TTTC a lot because that's where we're at right now.  C is starting IVF when her period comes next week.  We're both feeling ok about our decision, especially as our KD now has a pregnancy (but not live birth) under his belt so it's almost certainly C's issue.  Our donor's sperm froze/thawed poorly, so IVF gets around that.  Oh how I wish it has been as easy as fresh sperm in a syringe.

I'm also going to confess to an empty board that things have gone downhill with my mental health somewhat rapidly and I'm entering a day treatment program for a few months.  It's a scary thing to be undertaking, but I think it's needed.  My psychiatrist has wonderful things to say about the program and I am cautiously hopeful.  I remember the support for @lv and feel this board has always been such a safe space for me.

The timing sucks, but we've made a very conscious decision not to put TTC on hold.  We don't know when C will eventually be successful with treatment, and we'd already made the decision that despite my fears about parenting with mental health issues, C and I are a team that can do this.

[ct]

Yes, you absolutely can do this. You have taken the steps necessary to regain control and happiness. I hope the program is a great fit, you meet wonderful and supportive people there, and you are feeling more like yourself soon!

big hugs to you! you know where to find me if ever needed.

[2brides]

I think it is wonderful that you are entering this day program. Getting the help you need can be a daunting thing, so I think it is very brave to not only do it, but also put it out there. I hope it is everything you want and need it to be.

I am very sorry that TTC has been such a challenge. It really isn't fair....

Come back. We're around, just not as active as we once were. Hang in there...

[Duchess1]

I think you are so brave to take care of yourself! I hope this is a wonderful program and you feel back on track soon.

Let us know how you are doing and know we are here if you need us. ((Hugs))

[bluedaisyus]

Hi! I can empathize on the lurking, I've been checking in but mostly on my phone because I've been CRAZY busy at work (a change in the hierarchy and lots of things happening).

I hope everything goes well with the day treatment! Sometimes I wonder if we hadn't put TTC on hold for things if we would have had a different outcome. I know I really shouldn't think that way, but I wish sometimes that we hadn't stopped for anything.

[kershnic]

I know we've talked recently, but I'm sorry I didn't realize things had gotten that bad. I'm sorry that you're struggling so much. You deserve a lot of credit for recognizing that you need more and being open to getting the treatment that you need. I hope this program can bring you some peace. I'm also glad that you still see this as a community to turn to, even when it has been so empty.

You and C are a good team and can get through this together. And you will be a better mother for having faced your own challenges.

You know where to find me if you need to talk. And of course I will be rooting for the success of your IVF.

[seattlekari]

It is really good to see you here. I hope the treatment program helps get you back to where you want to be. Kudos to you for taking this big step. Best of luck to you and C as you embark on the IVF train! And please pop in and let us know how you are. I check in with the board nearly every day. (((awkwardpenguin)))