Help me convince DH to let me join a gym

[agrippa]

I'm a SAHM to two kids. I used to have a jogging stroller, but just couldn't work up to any significant miles while pushing it. We live in a hilly area and the hills just killed me every time. So, I sold it.

Part of our HOA fees includes paying for an indoor lap pool and gym at our community center. It's awesome, but the indoor pool has crappy hours (6-9 am and 5-8 pm, which is after DH goes to work and dinner/bedtime for the kids), so I rarely get there during the week. The gym doesn't have childcare, and is only open from 7am-8 pm. DH gets home at 5. Dinner is at 5:30 or 6. DD's bedtime is between 7 and 7:30, and DS's bedtime is at 8. There's no time to get there after he gets home. Now that it's light out, I can occasionally run outside after bedtimes, but between cleaning up from dinner (DH is working on finishing the basement, so he's usually there after bedtime) and other household stuff, I really only get out for one or two really short runs during the week. I do get a long run on the weekend.

I want to join a gym with childcare so that I can actually get some good workouts in more than two to three times a week. DH doesn't want to pay for a membership to one because technically we already are. BUT, it's essentially useless for us.

So, help me convince him. Please?

ETA: Oh, and we could afford it. It's just the principle of the thing that's bothering him.

[statlerwaldorf]

Childcare is very worth it. DD loves going because she gets to socialize with other kids and I think it has been good for her independence. It is cheaper than hiring a babysitter several times a week. We have a membership to the YMCA which includes use of the outdoor pools during the summer and reduced fees on children's classes such as gymnastics and swimming lessons.

[RoryGilmore]

Staying healthy and active is important for your body as much as it is an important lesson for your children. You want them growing up knowing that a healthy lifestyle is a priority, as is making time for yourself even when you are a spouse and a parent. You may have a gym but it's not working for you and you need a strategy that works.

Although, I would also consider adjusting things a bit first so that you can give it a good try to use what you've got (and maybe see what DH thinks of the other options). There are certain days that DH gets home and dinner is already in the oven. I go exercise while he gets dinner out of the oven and feeds the kids. I miss family dinner - but I'm home for that bit of playtime and then bedtime routine.

[gt7301b]

It sounds to me like you can't actually use the gym in your community center.

I would ask your DH if he would be willing to do dinner solo a couple of times a week so that you can workout since those are the only times it is open. If he says no, then tell him that it is important to you that you get to workout more frequently.

Why are the hours so limited at the community center? Can you ask for the gym to stay open a little later?

[agrippa]

May 14, 2012 13:49:56 GMT -5 gt7301b said:

It sounds to me like you can't actually use the gym in your community center.

I would ask your DH if he would be willing to do dinner solo a couple of times a week so that you can workout since those are the only times it is open. If he says no, then tell him that it is important to you that you get to workout more frequently.

Why are the hours so limited at the community center? Can you ask for the gym to stay open a little later?

I think it's a money issue. They just reduced the hours for both the pool and the gym. They pool in particular was hardly used. DH used to get home earlier so he and I would take turns swimming laps in the winter, and often we'd be the only people signing in all week. They gym is used more frequently, but I guess not enough to actually keep it open as long as they used to. There are a few evening classes that start at 8, but we have to pay additional fees for them and they're things like yoga and zumba, which I have no desire to do.

[Wines Not Whines]

What about hiring a sitter to stay with the kids a few hours a week and using the gym you already have access to? Would that work for you, and would your DH agree to spend money on that?

[stephiehun]

May 14, 2012 18:06:00 GMT -5 Wines Not Whines said:

What about hiring a sitter to stay with the kids a few hours a week and using the gym you already have access to? Would that work for you, and would your DH agree to spend money on that?

Depending on how much the sitter charges, it might be cheaper to join the gym.

OP, we are in the same boat. DH talked me into letting him join a gym because our community center is really small and not kept up well. He just couldn't lift the way he wanted/needed to. I only got bitter about it when he stopped going regularly. (He's since started again.)
It's something he enjoys and is important for his health.

If you can afford it, I'd continue to push the issue. It's good for your physical and emotional health!

[smiley]

Is there another sahm in your community that may be willing to exchange babysitting hours so you can rotate working out??

I hope that made sense.

[agrippa]

Thanks all! I am going to talk with him tonight. Cross your fingers!

[alithebride]

i wonder why you actually even need his permission for something like this. i'm actually shocked that's its even an issue. is he kidding?!?!?!?
it's not like you want to join a pub crawl group so you can go and get smashed every afternoon. it's a gym that is good for your health and well being.

just go and join. if he makes a stink too bad. it's not up for negotiation if you can afford it.