I didn't get time to read all of the responses but if it were me, I would want to stay in the same place where my dd is, whether that be at home, at my moms, or somewhere else.
My daughter is just a month older than yours. I get frequent migraines which puts me out of commission a few evenings a week lots of weeks. We have talked to her about it a lot over the years and she totally gets it and is great. She knows that she can tiptoe into my room to kiss me if she asks first but otherwise my room is off limits.
I think you should do whatever will be best for your recovery but I think you can make it work to be with in the same house as your dd and a caregiver if that's your preference. There are lots of books about parents having surgery or illness that you could read to prepare her for what your recovery would be like.
As for your gma, I would suggest calling your local Council on Aging and explaining your situation to see what they suggest.
Post by SusanBAnthony on Jan 24, 2014 8:12:04 GMT -5
If your grandma refuses to go somewhere to stay, I would just hire a PCA to come in twice a day and check on her. If she wants to risk breaking a hip and end up in a nursing home, well, her choice.
Having your mom cover for your daughter before and after daycare is a good plan. For the weekends, I would have your dd stay where ever you are most comfortable, so probably with your sister. Have a conversation and see if you can work out the details for at least one of the weekends. If she can't cover both, one weekend with the crazy in laws won't do lasting damage.
This sounds like a touch situation. Best of luck for a smooth recovery.
I'd try to send DD to your Sisters for a week or two. Stay at your house, and hire someone to come help you & grandma. And, like every one else said... find a way to get out of your mess, to liveon your own. Your Mom is a problem here, too. she cant just dump Grandma on you.
Post by vanillacourage on Jan 24, 2014 9:44:46 GMT -5
What about YOU going to respite care? I'm serious - they're not all bad. They're basically studio apartments and nursing staff come in and check on you occasionally. Your DD goes to your mom's/sister's, you go to respite care, and grandma can sit on her butt and be miserable at home.
Post by Chuppathingy on Jan 24, 2014 11:08:05 GMT -5
I did not know respite care was an option for young people. Is it something I could see about having my insurance cover?
My plan for myself is admittedly pretty weak. I'm making freezer meals so I don't have to cook. I'll be staying in mom's guest room which has an attached bath so I won't have to go far. I have a friend driving me to my follow up appointments. My step dad will be there at night, but he's also a CPA, so I'm on my own during the day. Theoretically it shouldn't be a big deal because I'll be spending most of my time in bed, but I've been worried about what if something goes wrong.
Post by SusanBAnthony on Jan 24, 2014 12:12:38 GMT -5
You also might be able to go to a nursing home or skilled nursing facility. Or hire a PCA to come check on you once during the day, get you food, help you bathe, etc. You will probably need help bathing, right?
You also might be able to go to a nursing home or skilled nursing facility. Or hire a PCA to come check on you once during the day, get you food, help you bathe, etc. You will probably need help bathing, right?
I honestly didn't think of this. What my surgeon said was specifically "no driving, no prolonged or strenuous activity, no sitting or standing for prolonged periods of time, no lifting over 5 pounds." I have an appointment specifically for talking about care during recovery next week. I'll have to ask for clarification.
Post by explorer2001 on Jan 24, 2014 12:59:02 GMT -5
See if you can get in touch with a social worker through the hospital where you are having surgery. When I had my emergency surgery in Oct 2012, I was able to talk to the hospital's social worker and get info for respite care, temporary skilled nursing, and in home health aide/CNA type visits a few times a day. As it turned out the CNA people needs like 3 days to get me on the schedule and I ended up not needing it. But it is work.looking into thus proactively so the there's time to get you on the schedule.
Yes its available for younger people as well. It isn't required that you be old. Insurance coverage will vary based on the diagnosed level of support needed/temporary disability. There are certain minimum requirements for functioning (ex ability to feed yourself, toilet by yourself, move, etc.) If these requirements aren't met then insurance usually covers support services but again check first.
Hugs! You shouldn't have to worry too much about entertainment. You'll be exhausted and needing to sleep a lot and you should have a box from me before then.
I didn't read every response, and while I'm most sure, I would think you would qualify for disability. Not sure if money is an issue or not, but applying for disability could help you find someone to help with the care.