Last names as middle names

[anna7602]

How do you feel about this? I don't love it as I am not a Rockefeller or Kennedy or from any kind of family where you hear the name and go "ahhhh." Besides, I have plenty of family members who have my maiden name, so it's not like my child will be the last to carry on the name.

As you can tell by my description, I am lukewarm about the idea. But DH pushed for it with DD and is pushing for it again with baby #2. There's not another middle name we feel especially strongly about right now and it's really, really, really weird in my culture to not have a middle name at all (although having a last name as a middle name is equally as rare in my culture).

[MrsDarcy]

I think it's perfectly fine. If this baby is a boy, we're leaning strongly toward my grandmothers maiden name as the boy's middle name. It's very much a last name, and I've never heard it as a first name.

[katiek]

I like the idea of it in theory, but my maiden name would sound so, so stupid as a middle name. I would say that if you don't feel strongly about including your maiden name, there's no point in doing it. Is there a particular reason why your H is so insistent on it? If you want to include your family, maybe find a name from your family tree that flows well with the first name, that way the kid will have a middle name and include your family, but you don't necessarily have to worry about honouring someone who is still alive.

[noodleskooze]

I used my maiden name as a first name for DS, so obviously I like the idea and think it can work.

[sjh722]

I don't mind it, but my maiden name is Dutch and doesn't lend itself well to middle-naming. (It's not something fancy like Vanderbilt, LOL). I think it depends on the name.

[rbp]

Where is your H from? This is really popular in the South. My H's middle name is his mom's maiden name, and BIL's maiden name is his maternal grandmother's maiden name. I think it's a sweet sentiment, but H's middle name is a beast. BIL's is Brown, so much more manageable. 

I don't like my maiden name as a middle name, so we haven't really talked about it. I wouldn't dismiss it if it were important to my H though, because I'm not sure middle names matter all that much.

[loira]

We'll probably also be doing a surname as a middle name for either boy or girl, but baby will also probably have 2 middle names. It's how it's been done in my family for a few generations now. H gets very little say on middle names since he is already contributing the family surname.

[bowies]

We will be doing this - it is tradition on my H's side of the family to use the mom's maiden name as a middle name (which means I won't be posting it on here publicly). Luckily my MN lends itself well to this tradition. I personally like the idea of using family names as middle names but it's not something I feel beholden to doing if I don't like it. I say keep an open mind and if it's a name that you generally like then put it on the short list.

[flgirl]

All 3 and soon to be 4 kids have the same middle name, my maiden name. I don't really "get" the reason for a middle name so I would rather it tie them to my family like their last name ties them to my husband's family. They love that they all have the same middle name.

[speckledfrog]

It's quite common nowadays for a child to have the mother's maiden name as a middle name.

[anna7602]

Mar 1, 2014 13:41:56 GMT -5 rbp said:

Where is your H from? This is really popular in the South.

DH is southern. His mother's middle name is a family last name, etc. etc. It's kind of a weird concept to me unless you had a very illustrious ancestor (which I don't, and we're talking about my maiden name, not last names on his side of the family).

[curbsideprophet]

Does DD have any family names in her name? It could be a little weird to give one child a family name and when another has none.

Since it is your maiden name I think you should get more of a day than DH. There is no way I could have done this without upsetting my mother. My mother and father are divorced. My mom was upset when she found out I kept my my maiden name as a middle, I can only image what she would say if we gave a child my maiden name.

[centralsquare]

I love it. My family all has two specific maiden names as middle names, and it's been four generations now. I'm named after my great-grandmothers first/last as my first/middle. It's special and meaningful to us.

[livinitup]

I use my maiden name as my middle name and gave DD my maiden name as her middle name. I love it. She has a cultural first name but I never thought using my family name as a middle name "wasn't" cultural. I LOVE having matching middle and last names.

[anna7602]

Mar 1, 2014 16:39:46 GMT -5 curbsideprophet said:

Does DD have any family names in her name? It could be a little weird to give one child a family name and when another has none.

She doesn't. This is another reason I think it would be strange. But, DD is sad that all of her cousins have the same last name and she doesn't. Even my sister's daughter uses our maiden name because she legally changed it as an adult (she has no relationship with her own father).

Anyway, I know I am an outlier with my opinion. It's interesting to hear what others think. That's why I asked!

[curbsideprophet]

Names are hard. Good luck coming up with a name everyone likes.

[blushing]

I considered for if we have a second son. DS has the same second name as DH, and FIL, so a family name that extends back many generations. His first name is my dad's second name, my grandfather's second name, etc.

My maiden would not seem odd as a second name or first name. It is the same first name of a famous actor, just spelt slightly different. The problem is that my maiden name can be used as a verb and my married name can be used as a noun. And this verb and noun can be related to each other. It could make for teasing at school.

[ringstrue]

It's pretty traditional all over. Some families have lost it but if you look at your family tree hard enough it used to be pretty common.

It's weird that he is pushing you to do it when it's your maiden name. Is he just wanting to stick with family tradition?

I don't see why each kid has to have it. But bottom line I think both patents have to like the decision for it to work. GL!!

[mrspost08]

If we have a girl I really want to use my maiden name as her middle name. The boy name is a family tradition on DH side, so I don't think I will get my maiden name added.

[pinotgrig]

I actually love using maiden names in kids' names. Provided they make sense, of course. My maiden name would be a ridiculous first/middle name but I have friends who have great maiden names and used them in their kids names.

[laurenh]

I changed my middle name to my maiden name when I got married and it is my daughters middle name as well. Any future kids will have it too. The name will likely end with my brother, unless he decides to have kids (he's 44), so I wanted to keep it in use somehow.

[FastHands]

I only heard about this in the last few years when some of my friends took their maiden names as their middle names post-marriage. I was initially drawn to it, just because my family is so important to me. In the end, I think we will use first/middle names after my parents' first names instead. Those are the specific people I want to honor more than my whole lineage, if that makes sense.

[anna7602]

Mar 1, 2014 20:16:16 GMT -5 ringstrue said:

It's pretty traditional all over. Some families have lost it but if you look at your family tree hard enough it used to be pretty common.

It's weird that he is pushing you to do it when it's your maiden name. Is he just wanting to stick with family tradition?

I don't see why each kid has to have it. But bottom line I think both patents have to like the decision for it to work. GL!!

No, I am certain that it was not used in my family tree, it's just not a tradition in my culture. Really. Two last names are the norm, father's last name first, mother's last name second. There would be no need to stick a last name in the middle name spot.

[disappointedkittens]

We just did it My maiden name is a common first name though, and no one else in my family has used it for their children. I think it's neat if it works, but I wouldn't have done it if it didn't flow nicely.