so..sorta random question. long.

[jennlin]

i have a coworker friend... who i really liked before maternity leave..although our friendship was still just beginning at the time (3-4ish months?). we had lunch together maybe once a week, talked over our work IM system daily, and we texted almost every day while i was on ML (there was a lot of work drama he was filling me in about). i invited him to baby boy's one month party, and he said yes, he'd go..bring his two kids, and a friend. and that was fine with me..i prepaid about $25/person for their meals.. and he didn't show up. i sent him a text to see if they were coming about half hour into it, and he never responded...i didn't hear from him for over a month..when he texted me and said "i'm sorry, i haven't been a good friend, how can i make it up to you?" and i told him "a hand made i'm-sorry card", and he said he would do it. we continued to text at this point..but only once or twice a month....

now that i'm back at work, i saw him on the first day, and he told me he didn't realize i was coming back already, and he'd make my card that night... on the second day i was back, he said he was busy and he couldn't do it. he's avoided me day 3 and day 4 now.

am i expecting too much? should i just brush the whole thing off and pretend nothing happened? or do i hold him to making it up to me? he was the one that asked how he could make it up to me...........?

#annoyed

[georgeharrison]

I wouldn't worry about the card, but the whole avoiding you thing is pretty immature. And you paying for four people to come to the party and not show is super lame! I'd just kind of start from scratch now that you are back, with no expectations from him. If you start to build a good friendship again, great, but I wouldn't expect it to just pick up where you left off when you went on leave. It sounds like he kind of moved on (for lack of better words) while you were gone.

[karebear219]

Apr 1, 2014 14:43:42 GMT -5 georgeharrison said:

I wouldn't worry about the card, but the whole avoiding you thing is pretty immature. And you paying for four people to come to the party and not show is super lame! I'd just kind of start from scratch now that you are back, with no expectations from him. If you start to build a good friendship again, great, but I wouldn't expect it to just pick up where you left off when you went on leave. It sounds like he kind of moved on (for lack of better words) while you were gone.

This.

[mrslefty]

Ditto spunbutterfly and georgeharrison

[7costanza]

Apr 1, 2014 22:04:34 GMT -5 @legalbritt said:

Is he married? Maybe his wife or girlfriend got jealous of your friendship? If my husband was texting daily with one of his female coworkers I might be a little like hmmm and bring it up.
I think it's super weird that he's avoiding you. The card bin is t as issue. It's the avoidance. Lame.

That was my first thought too. I wouldn't expect him to make up for missing the party at all, and just move on. I totally get being annoyed though, I would be too.

[picksthemusic]

ITA with everyone else. Let it go (haha, we just saw Frozen and I just had the song go through my head), and move on. Just be more wary if he tries to be friends again.

[jennlin]

okay..sounds like i'll just see what happens..i got switched teams while i was gone, so i'll no longer see him, but we still work close..but our paths don't cross..


he's divorced, no gf, not even close to seeing someone..just...self pity party of being alone right now (relatively recent wife initiated divorce)..so it wasn't a jealousy thing.