Please tell me my baby won't be awake from 11 pm - 11 am!

[woodenshoes]

We're going on our first international flight next week with our soon to be 9 month old. We'll be travelling from the Netherlands to California on a non-stop (yay!) flight which will be 10+ hours long. We're leaving around 10 in the morning our time and land in California at around noon on the same day. Right now DS sleeps from 8 pm - 8 am.

Any tips or advice on how to help him adjust to the time difference (9 hours) and jetlag? If he holds true to his current sleep time he would be sleeping from 11 am to 11 pm once we are in California. While that in and of itself isn't so terrible, the idea of him being awake with only a few naps between the hours of 11 pm and 11 am is kind of scary.

He's just finally in the last month begun to have a normal sleep cycle so it's a bit depressing thinking I might be throwing his entire schedule out of whack. A visit to Grandma is worth it though, right?

[frlcb]

Honestly going west is harder for my kids than going east, so I would expect a few days transition. Follow his cues, and get him outside as much as possible!

[pittpurple]

How long are you visiting?
I flew from Scotland - California last summer when DD was 7 months and it took her a week to adjust. She wasn't sleeping through anyway and has never slept 12 hours straight in her life so I didn't have very high expectations!

I've heard a day per hour to get them on track and that was true for us - after a week, she was back to her usual self of sleeping like 8pm-5am. But I don't want to lie, it was a long week of her getting up ready to hang out at midnight. I was on my own though and my dad was no help at all, if you are going with your SO it will be easier so at least you can have some help!

[woodenshoes]

Apr 2, 2014 8:53:53 GMT -5 pittpurple said:

How long are you visiting?
I flew from Scotland - California last summer when DD was 7 months and it took her a week to adjust. She wasn't sleeping through anyway and has never slept 12 hours straight in her life so I didn't have very high expectations!

I've heard a day per hour to get them on track and that was true for us - after a week, she was back to her usual self of sleeping like 8pm-5am. But I don't want to lie, it was a long week of her getting up ready to hang out at midnight. I was on my own though and my dad was no help at all, if you are going with your SO it will be easier so at least you can have some help!

We'll be there for 2 1/2 weeks. H will be there and we'll be staying with my mom so at least I'll have some help like you say! How was returning home? Did it take just as long to readjust?

This will be the first time my extended family (aunts, uncles, cousins) are meeting him and he's going through a stage right now where he only wants to be held by H or I and has a meltdown with anyone else. I am worried this will only make it worse but what can you do? I am going to try my best to be as breezy as possible!

[pittpurple]

Yeah, we were at the same stage but she did great with all the family, a bit clingy at times but no worse than when we're home!

We were in the states for almost 2 months and made our way back East so she got used to it gradually. We flew overnight from Newark and she slept the whole way on my husband's lap and was fine when we returned. We really struggled getting used to the huge jump in time from the UK to California but the 5 hours going the other way didn't seem to be a problem.

[pittpurple]

Oh - and my totally unsolicited advice... Take every moment of help offered. I really struggled to let anyone help me even when we were staying somewhere where people offered (as opposed to my dad!). I think I was nervous she'd get upset and people wouldn't think she was a lovely baby? So I was a total mess by the time DH met up with me a few weeks later as I'd barely slept at all. So if you can take a nap while Grandma / cousins / whoever are in charge enjoy it!

[woodenshoes]

I am not one to accept help usually when it comes to DS (with the exception of H) but I am really glad you mentioned it. I should and will. I know my mom would love to just hang out with him, so if I am up in the middle of the night with him, I really should let her take that bonding time so I can catch up on rest during the day.

I get the desire for others to think your baby is lovely. Especially since DS is having this anxiety when others are around I worry he comes off as unfriendly and since relatives will only be meeting him for a short period of time he might not have the chance to warm up to them. I want them to see the sweet little guy we know and love.

[frlcb]

Definitely take help when needed. And going East always is easier for us, my kids adjust in a day or two, as opposed to West, where it takes longer.

[Shreddingbetty]

We do CO to Europe and back. Going to Europe is definitely easier on DD. She is usually right on track from day 1. We usually leave really early in the AM from CO (like 3 am) and we never have a direct flight so by the time we get to Europe her sleep is pretty well screwed up anyway. We usually get to my parents around 11 am (the next day) and then we all take a nap for about 2-3 hours (and set an alarm). Then I put DD to bed at her usual time and she is usually good to go after that (the first couple of days she would still wake up at night like at home). She may be a little more tired the first couple of days but her sleep is fine. I kept the same nap schedule as well.
Going back to CO is also a long trip. We usually leave around 11ish am from Paris and have a layover in DC or Chicago nd get in around 10 pm CO time. She never napped much on the first leg but usually the last leg she slept most of it (since it would be 3 or 4 am in Europe). Then we would get home and she would go straight to bed. The first 3-4 days she usually wakes up around 3 am. I get up with her and do some quiet playing (puzzles/books) for about 1.5-2 hours (in dim light) and then she goes back to bed for a couple of hours and then I get her up at her usual time and go back to her normal schedule right off the bet.
Her sleep is usually so messed up from the travel and the long days that it really seems to help getting her back on track. Since you have a direct flight it makes your travel day shorter but I'm not sure it would necessarily really change things much in the sleep department.
My DD was a "social butterfly " on her first trip at 4 months and shortly after we got back she developed serious separation anxiety that lasted a loooong time. I thought it was from the jet lag but it didn't go away after a few days. Our second trip she was 16 months old and even though she hadn't seen anyone other than my sister for a year she did fine with everyone. I think she somehow knew it was mommys family and that it was OK. We did look at pictures beforehand to refresh her memory (I never Skype with anyone other than my sister) Your DS may surprise you. Maybe just warn people that they should try and not smother your DS when they see him (which is what most women will do with any baby as tempting as that may be. DD seemed to always do better with people that just left her alone for the most part and let her warm up to them at her own rate.

[dutchgirl678]

It so depends. We have flown back and forth to the Netherlands a bunch of times. At 9 months you will probably be lucky and get some sleep out of him during the flight but don't count on it. The last time we went my son was 2 and daughter 5 and we repeatedly asked them to take a nap on the way to the Netherlands. They fell asleep 15 minutes before landing, lol. But, they slept in the car ride to my parents' house, stayed up until dinner time and then went to bed and had no jet lag the rest of our vacation. On the way back it too about a week to get back on their regular schedule. They would wake up at 3am, then 4am, then 5 until they were back on their regular time.