Monday morning check in

[KB]

How was your weekend with the kiddos? Anything really good or really bad?

DH took DS to the store to pick out an MD card. When they were at the store DS told DH, "we need to get Mommy some flowers for MD" and picked out a big bunch of carnations, daisies & babies breath. DS was so proud of himself. He said "Look Mommy, aren't they pretty? I picked them out just for you." I swear, the look on his face. Even though they look like a big bouquet of weeds, they are definitely the best flowers I've ever gotten. 

[auntie]

Kiddo bought me a card unprompted, though he did hit me up for $$$ claiming it was for lunch.

Pretty quiet day here, DS is rounding into finals. He had geology this morning, his integration presentation last week, two papers tomorrow and a German final Wednesday- then we're clear for graduation.

[muppetinma]

Andrew started with his new ABA therapist today. They were just pairing, so it was mostly playing and finding out what works as motivators for A. He seems to love her already, so that's awesome. They were playing with the Hooked on Phonics ipad app and he shocked me with how much he knew. I have no doubt that if we actually worked on it with him, he'd be reading at a 1st or 2nd grade level by the time he starts preschool in the fall, when he'll be 2.5.

[KB]

May 12, 2014 10:23:21 GMT -5 muppetinma said:

Andrew started with his new ABA therapist today. They were just pairing, so it was mostly playing and finding out what works as motivators for A. He seems to love her already, so that's awesome. They were playing with the Hooked on Phonics ipad app and he shocked me with how much he knew. I have no doubt that if we actually worked on it with him, he'd be reading at a 1st or 2nd grade level by the time he starts preschool in the fall, when he'll be 2.5.

Is he hyperlexic? DS is and his reading is insane. He's already at a 1st grade level and he's 3.5. 

[muppetinma]

May 12, 2014 10:26:53 GMT -5 KB said:

May 12, 2014 10:23:21 GMT -5 muppetinma said:

Andrew started with his new ABA therapist today. They were just pairing, so it was mostly playing and finding out what works as motivators for A. He seems to love her already, so that's awesome. They were playing with the Hooked on Phonics ipad app and he shocked me with how much he knew. I have no doubt that if we actually worked on it with him, he'd be reading at a 1st or 2nd grade level by the time he starts preschool in the fall, when he'll be 2.5.

Is he hyperlexic? DS is and his reading is insane. He's already at a 1st grade level and he's 3.5. 

Undiagnosed, but beyond apparent.  He's a textbook case.  

[litebright]

Ugh. It's been really up and down lately. Thursday was awful (she was really having issues with getting into other kids' space at her last music class), Saturday was great (her last soccer game of the season -- she was definitely in the game and had some great defense and passes).

She actually kept a secret for Mother's Day. Normally when she makes something, she will say things like, "You're going to love the XYZ I made for you, it's a surprise!", obviously not making the connection of not-talking about a secret to keep it a surprise. But she made several art projects in class last week, brought them home, hid them and brought them out yesterday morning and though she talked about them a bit, it was never directly.

She and DD2 have been struggling a bit in their play lately. At one point I heard DD1 say something along the lines of, "I'm just going to be the bad guy, it's easier." And then DD2 gets upset when DD1 is playing the bad guy. Sigh. She likes the bad guys/mean characters in movies, probably because they're easier to read and predict -- like, when the girls play Monsters University she wants to be a Roar Omega Roar (the mean, snotty fraternity). I asked her why, and she said, "If I'm not in Roar Omega Roar, they'll lose."

If it was her making a conscious decision to like offbeat characters, that'd be one thing. But I think the attraction to the villains/bullies is representative of her lack of social understanding and I'm kind of worried about the possible implications there.

[auntie]

May 12, 2014 12:05:10 GMT -5 litebright said:

If it was her making a conscious decision to like offbeat characters, that'd be one thing. But I think the attraction to the villains/bullies is representative of her lack of social understanding and I'm kind of worried about the possible implications there.

Why does DS2 get upset? Is she afraid, does she have a script in mind or does she wasnt a turn to be the bad one?

A lot of kids with ASD are drawn to the bad actors in much the way they're drawn to the most "powerful" or "extreme" of what ever catches their eye. Like powerful dinosaurs, raptors, sharks, weather disasters- it's almost a fascination and way of having some of that power. Plus it can help them processing "scary".

[litebright]

May 12, 2014 16:04:34 GMT -5 auntie said:

May 12, 2014 12:05:10 GMT -5 litebright said:

If it was her making a conscious decision to like offbeat characters, that'd be one thing. But I think the attraction to the villains/bullies is representative of her lack of social understanding and I'm kind of worried about the possible implications there.

Why does DS2 get upset? Is she afraid, does she have a script in mind or does she wasnt a turn to be the bad one?

A lot of kids with ASD are drawn to the bad actors in much the way they're drawn to the most "powerful" or "extreme" of what ever catches their eye. Like powerful dinosaurs, raptors, sharks, weather disasters- it's almost a fascination and way of having some of that power. Plus it can help them processing "scary".

I think it's because DD1 doesn't really "work" with her a lot. There's not a ton of collaboration. When they both agree on what they're going to play, things go fine, but it's hard for the two of them to, say, decide to change directions and agree on how. They both want the play to go the way they'd like; they both switch up characters but also have their favorites, and they are fine with characters from different things going together (like dragons singing Let It Go, lol). 

But if there's a disagreement or one gets too handsy with the other, DD1 under-reacts if she does something to upset DD2 and although she is likely to apologize, she doesn't remediate/repair the situation/offer a solution. And DD2 is only four, and really hasn't gotten to that level yet, so it usually requires adult intervention.

It doesn't help that DD2 has developed a tendency to over-react to get her point across to a sib who doesn't often read her well. So a disagreement, instead of being worked through in some kind of moderate fashion, often ends up with DD2 shrieking and DD1 ignoring/keeping on with what she's doing. 

[hopecounts]

Pretty nice weekend.
DD behaved pretty well for mother's day lunch with the extended family on Saturday She got a little restless/sensory seeking when we had to wait almost an hour for our food but MIL/DH/I took turns taking her outside to walk/play and she settled down. Once our food was there she was fine.

Sunday she did great for our brunch with MIL and gave kisses and hugs to MIL and GMIL and me.
I even managed to get a good picture of us together.

She's doing well with ABA, she's really getting non-identical matching and knocking that goal out of the park.
Still working on her responding to her name, she responds but there is a delay that we are working to get her past.

[KB]

May 12, 2014 12:05:10 GMT -5 litebright said:

Ugh. It's been really up and down lately. Thursday was awful (she was really having issues with getting into other kids' space at her last music class), Saturday was great (her last soccer game of the season -- she was definitely in the game and had some great defense and passes).

DS has started doing this too. He has been hugging kids in his class at school and trying to hold hands with kids he's playing with. We're working on getting him to ask before he touches people but he definitely doesn't get it. He's trying so hard to be friendly and doesn't understand why it may not be appropriate. 

[gnorah]

We're up and down too. We've got the computer time problem solved - we figured out a system that has worked for about 2 months and we haven't fought about the computer in ages AND DS has been playing outside, with his toys, reading, etc etc without us having to nag him. Much, much, MUCH better.

But he's been very inward facing these days - things are all about him and he's having a hard time adjusting his actions to work with his friends. His psychologist has started working with him and another little boy on social skills for the next few weeks so we'll see where that goes.

I'm not sure what to do about the summer... he's in a ton of day camps which should go fine, they're normally short enough and structured enough that he does well. But I don't know what to do about his counselling appointments. He does a lot better when he is seeing her regularly, but coordinating with daycamps is a nightmare. Normally we do Friday afternoons because he is done school at noon on Fridays, but that doesn't work for daycamps. We might take a break for July/August and pick things up in September. We'll see.