T&P one more time.

[WOT?*]

My dad's wife is coming home from the hospital today. While it sounds like great news, it's quite the opposite. She's tired of being in the hospital, tired of getting poked and prodded, tired of recovering, just plain tired of everything. She was supposed to be out of the hospital three weeks ago but she's had two strokes, an infection and liquid has been building up in her lungs.

She's coming home to die. No treatment, no meds, no food, no IVs, no measures. The doctors say four weeks at most if she continues on the path she's decided to take.

She still doesn't know that my dad died. The doctors said don't tell her unless she asks to prevent any setbacks. I don't see how this could be any more of a setback. I wonder if she already knows. She started really fighting treatment over the weekend and demanded that the doctors call her daughter at 2:00 a.m. the day Dad died.

So instead of making plans to have her being taken care of and recuperating and having a memorial service for Dad, we're making plans to distribute dad's and her cremains together.

[Deleted]

I'm so sorry. And feel free to not answer this, but is she in pain? If so I hope something is at least being done to alleviate that and make her last days as comfortable as possible.

I hope you are holding up ok. Sending lots of T&P!

[partiallysunny]

I don't know the back story, but that sounds very rough. I'm so sorry you are going through this.

[Kristinmo]

I'm so sorry

[alzi]

I'm so sorry:(

[karmasabiotch]

It sounds like she knows. I'm not sure I agree with the don't tell her part. Not knowing can be more sad than the truth. I think it's so important to let people know it's okay to stop the fight.

I'm so sorry.

[bbaggins]

Jul 18, 2012 13:06:21 GMT -5 karmasabiotch said:

I think it's so important to let people know it's okay to stop the fight.

I'm so sorry.

I agree. Obviously I'm sorry for the situation and for the OP's family.

[WOT?*]

She had a heart attack back on Memorial Day. My dad was bedridden with Alzheimer's and she was his primary caretaker at their home. My brother and sisters took care of him from Memorial Day until I flew down on May 31 to take my turn to take care of him and we had him placed in a skilled nursing facility. She was released home just before we had him moved. She spent those days with him and was there when he was moved to the nursing facility on Saturday June 9 and she went back into the hospital Monday the 11th and had her surgery on the 13th of June. She was supposed to be out in a week but instead she had two strokes, an infection, edema and fluid build up in her lungs and has been in the hospital since her surgery. Hospice has been called and she is in their hands instead of rehab now. My dad died last weekend.

I agree she needs to be told. It's heartbreaking though. She was an amazing wife to my dad.

[kellbell191]

I am so sorry, what a horrible situation all around.

[bab]

What a sad story. My heart goes out to you mrsbpo.

[daisyheadmaizie]

I am so sorry. What an awful few weeks you and your family have had. Hospice workers are truly amazing people. I hope that they can help make her final days as comfortable as possible.

[starlily]

I am so sorry that your family its going through such s hard time.

In light of the path that she has already chosen, I would want to tell her about her spouse. I just feel like she has a right to know that he is no longer suffering.

[vicky]

I am so very sorry for you and your family. Lots of T&P's and hugs your way.

[cleo29]

I'm so sorry. What an awful time for your family. I will be keeping all of you in my thoughts and prayers.

The biggest bear hug in the world to you right now.

[morgan2004]

I'm so sorry, my mom and stepdad died exactly 4 weeks apart so I understand what you're going through. After my mom died, he just gave up. It was a very difficult time but I promise you will get through it. Please send me a PM if you ever need to talk.

[karmasabiotch]

My Mom and her brother who was living wih her died 3 weeks apart. They were in the hospital at the same time.

I'm so sorry about your Dad. Hugs...

[firedancer49]

That is a horrible situation, I am very sorry.

[jaylea]

Wow. I am so sorry. that's an awful lot for all of you to take in this short period of time.

I just want to give you a hug.