CNN: Baby Boomers Don't Count on Inheritance

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Baby boomers: Don't count on a fat inheritance
By Beth Braverman @money July 26, 2012: 5:10 AM ET








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Only 14% of baby boomers' parents feel they owe their kids an inheritance.


(MONEY Magazine) -- Where there's a will ... there's not much money these days.

Only 14% of baby boomers' parents -- down from 22% in 2005 -- feel they owe their kids an inheritance, reports Allianz.











Instead, they're spending the remains of their savings on health care and good times with the family.

"Culturally, the idea of a legacy has disappeared for all but the very wealthy," says Hendrik Hartog, author of "Someday All This Will Be Yours."

Legacy planning

For adult children: Lower your expectations.

See also: Some ultra-rich pick charity over kids

While more than half of parents still hope to leave $100,000 or more, their expenses and market returns may intervene.

"An inheritance is like Social Security," says Manhattan planner Kathy Boyle. "It's been underfunded, so don't count on it."





For parents: Discuss where your money will go and why, and how much there is.

That addresses parents' top priority for wealth transfer: minimizing conflict.

"Families that keep everything close to the vest are a train wreck waiting to happen," says Kansas attorney Kyle Krull.

[IIOY]

Too late.

Random anecdote: while visiting my parents this summer, I asked about all the folks living in their neighborhood who seemed to be filthy rich (they live in a golf community), since many seemed to have fairly middle class jobs that probably wouldn't make the average person wealthy. My parents are pretty sociable and are friends with many of them, and I've met many of them. Aside from a few who had upper management jobs and earned their own money, the vast majority had inherited their money from their parents.

[ringstrue]

A lot of the financial advice (that my stepdad reads, anyway) has been about not storing up all your $$ for your kids when you die and instead concentrating on keeping yourself alive and healthy and happy. Considering the state of everything, I think I agree with that general idea.

[Melissa W.]

My grandparents have done extremely well planning for retirement while my parents have not. I actually hope that my grandparents spend every last dime because it sickens me that my parents have lived with the expectation that my grandparents will leave them a bunch of money.

[wawa]

The idea of the boomers waiting on their parents to croak is strange to me. Don't they usually have a bunch of siblings? I mean...baby boom. Lots of babies. My parents and IL's have 8, 5, 4 and 5 siblings. Even if my grandparents were rolling in the dough, divided 5 ways it's still not enough to retire on. Are our families an outlier on that one?

[terpsfan]

Jul 26, 2012 7:48:19 GMT -5 ringstrue said:

A lot of the financial advice (that my stepdad reads, anyway) has been about not storing up all your $$ for your kids when you die and instead concentrating on keeping yourself alive and healthy and happy. Considering the state of everything, I think I agree with that general idea.

This is what I have heard my parents say about my grandparents situation (please don't worry about us, SPEND your money on YOU!) and I agree...I don't expect to receive anything from my parents as I hope they spend it all on themselves (and hopefully not all on medical bills). My parents are more well off than my grandparents (so my parents really don't need nor want any inheritance) but I don't expect to receive anything from my parents either...

[Melissa W.]

Jul 26, 2012 8:31:53 GMT -5 terpsfan said:

Jul 26, 2012 7:48:19 GMT -5 ringstrue said:

A lot of the financial advice (that my stepdad reads, anyway) has been about not storing up all your $$ for your kids when you die and instead concentrating on keeping yourself alive and healthy and happy. Considering the state of everything, I think I agree with that general idea.

This is what I have heard my parents say about my grandparents situation (please don't worry about us, SPEND your money on YOU!) and I agree...I don't expect to receive anything from my parents as I hope they spend it all on themselves (and hopefully not all on medical bills). My parents are more well off than my grandparents (so my parents really don't need nor want any inheritance) but I don't expect to receive anything from my parents either...

I'd like to think if my grandparents do leave stuff, that it will be a happy surprise not something anyone is counting on.

[terpsfan]

Jul 26, 2012 8:37:29 GMT -5 Melissa W. said:

Jul 26, 2012 8:31:53 GMT -5 terpsfan said:

This is what I have heard my parents say about my grandparents situation (please don't worry about us, SPEND your money on YOU!) and I agree...I don't expect to receive anything from my parents as I hope they spend it all on themselves (and hopefully not all on medical bills). My parents are more well off than my grandparents (so my parents really don't need nor want any inheritance) but I don't expect to receive anything from my parents either...

I'd like to think if my grandparents do leave stuff, that it will be a happy surprise not something anyone is counting on.

Exactly...more like hey, here's a little bit of money to go on vacation vs enough for me live on for the next 20 years...

[ringstrue]

My mom opened some sort of life ins. (whole?) for her to gift to my sisters and myself as "sorry I died" money (not for funeral costs and whatnot).

My biggest issue with her is going to be prying her out of that huge-ass house and selling it before it goes to shit. My grandma is still independently living in her house but the house really is not in the best of shape. So I'm trying to be all "cautionary tale" on my mom about it. Sweet daughter that I am...

[NitaX]

Jul 26, 2012 7:51:46 GMT -5 Melissa W. said:

My grandparents have done extremely well planning for retirement while my parents have not. I actually hope that my grandparents spend every last dime because it sickens me that my parents have lived with the expectation that my grandparents will leave them a bunch of money.

Scoot over, I'm on this train. My grandma has done fairly well with her retirement. She was always a big saver and made pretty sound investment decisions. Her children, Lord help them, run to her for money all.the.dayum.time. I told her last year that she needed to make sure she had a will set up because the last thing I felt like doing was watching my aunts and my mom fight over whatever money she had left.

Her response "your mom ain't getting a damn dime. Neither is Aunt V. Trifling asses. I'm leaving anything I have to the grandkids." LOL

[meg]

Yeah I dont have a problem with this mindset. Having watched my grandparents fritter away their wealth, ending their days relying on their kids to help care for them and finally in a home under title 19- and the finaincial issues and headaches their kids had to sort out were just awful... yeah. Worry about your retirement as priority number 1 (isnt this generally what is advised anyhow?).

Beyond that, I prefer the mindset of using any extra money after funding retirement to enjoy the time you have left. DH has had these conversations with his mom (a baby boomer who thinks and acts like she is in an older generation). They fund their retirement first, but after that they are very very concerned with amassing inheritance for the kids. Which is a lovely sentiment... but in the meantime this means that MIL is working at a very very stressful job (and the woman has had 2 heart attacks and other health issues) and we never see them. DH has flat out asked her to take the money she has earmarked for us when she dies and to put it towards extra time off at work and more visits to spend time with us and her grandson. She didnt do this of course, but really. We would rather have a relationship with her for her grandkids, our children, than their money. We plan our finances regardless of someday inheritances (well, we have been talking about how we will handle the taxes wrt the business actually but in terms of spending).

My parents have embraced the idea that "you can't take it with you" and after saving for retirement, they are enjoying their financial assets now. And enjoying them WITH us... family vacations to cape cod, nice dinners, etc. It makes more sense anyhow with the high death tax... spend it now and use it with your kids if that is what you want, to benefit them too, and that money will be worth much more than it will after taxes are done with it when you die.

I really dont understand the mindset of assuming and planning as if you are going to get some big inheritance.

ETA: I misread. Thought it was saying that baby boomers dont plan to leave inheritances. Sort of a random article - arent many of the boomers parents dead already? Or certainly WELL into their retirements?

[ladybrettashley]

None of my grandparents had a pot to piss in, and they had 8 and 7 kids respectively, so no, there was no inheritance for my parents. Frankly, it's stupid to rely on inheritance no matter how much money your parents had. However, my grandmother (dad's mom) did just die last year when she was hit by a car so each of her children is getting a portion of the settlement. My dad is using his portion to take our whole family on a trip to Europe.

I certainly don't expect any inheritance from my parents and am pretty sure my whole generation is screwed when it comes to retirement. Although my dad did say he will put his Social Security in a trust for his kids because it probably won't be there when we retire. I'll believe that when I see it.

[livinitup]

"A baby boomer is a person who was born during the demographic Post-World War II baby boom between the years 1946 and 1964." So this group just turned 66 - 48. Last year was a big hub-bub that the first group just started to qulaify for Social Security. Not old and dead at all.

[wawa]

Jul 26, 2012 11:58:32 GMT -5 sonrisa said:

Jul 26, 2012 11:56:00 GMT -5 livinitup said:

"A baby boomer is a person who was born during the demographic Post-World War II baby boom between the years 1946 and 1964." So this group just turned 66 - 48. Last year was a big hub-bub that the first group just started to qulaify for Social Security. Not old and dead at all.

This article is about the parents of boomers. If you are 48-66 and both your parents are still living, you are very lucky.

really? I'd think the low end of that it wouldn't be that surprising for parents to still be living.

People had kids younger those days. So somebody in their early 50's likely has parents in their early 70's. That's not THAT old.

[NitaX]

Jul 26, 2012 11:54:55 GMT -5 sonrisa said:

Jul 26, 2012 9:38:24 GMT -5 NitaX said:

Her response "your mom ain't getting a damn dime. Neither is Aunt V. Trifling asses. I'm leaving anything I have to the grandkids." LOL

50 bucks says the daughters come to the grandkids and expect you to renounce your interest in any inheritance in their favor.

I wouldn't doubt it. My mother routinely asks for money. Earlier this year it was to ask us for $900 for the balance on her trip (cruise with our church).

The thing is that I bet my grandma has everything set up in some sort of funds for the grandkids. And honestly, I don't even expect anything from it. I figure she'll probably leave everything to the great-grands vs. the grands.

It's really eye-roll worthy how everyone begs her for money. I won't even go on about my Aunt who is still in her good graces because I find she is just as trifling as the her siblings. I don't think she's ever had to pay to live anywhere. My grandmom has been adamant about keeping property in the family even if it's rundown. I once mentioned moving and she asked me if I would consider keeping my house and renting it to my Aunt A. Umm. Hell and No. If I can work to buy a house, then she can too. Plus, family is notorious for not paying rent. So, no. I'd rather not.

[Velvetshady]

Jul 26, 2012 11:58:32 GMT -5 sonrisa said:

Jul 26, 2012 11:56:00 GMT -5 livinitup said:

"A baby boomer is a person who was born during the demographic Post-World War II baby boom between the years 1946 and 1964." So this group just turned 66 - 48. Last year was a big hub-bub that the first group just started to qulaify for Social Security. Not old and dead at all.

This article is about the parents of boomers. If you are 48-66 and both your parents are still living, you are lucky.

Hmm, my dad is a baby boomer and both his parents have died (and didn't leave much inheritance). My mom was born before the boomers and her mom is still around (and will be leaving a large inheritance).

[eclaires]

My grandparents inherited a LOT of money from my great-grandparents. And that was after my great grandparents lived to 103 and 95, respectively.

But, they've used a lot of the money for their retirement b/c they didn't really have retirement savings and they also were running a business. Unfortunately, the business was one that saw a huge downturn in the past 5-8 years and they closed it last year. In the late 90s/early 2000s, it was making a lot of money, so when it started to go downhill, instead of cutting their losses then, they poured their money into it.

I'm hoping my parents aren't counting on any money from them, but who knows. When my dad's parents' died, they didn't have much beyond their house to sell and I think each of their 5 kids got like $10-20k. They had some sort of life insurance, but had made my one cousin a beneficiary for her to use for college (she's the youngest and starts college this fall). It was really kind of odd, but whatever - their money, do what you want with it.

[AJL]

I hate the arrogant expectations of entitled children.

My mom and dad have been very clear that there will be nothing left of material worth when they die and that is fine by me and my sister. We've told them both that the only things we want are all the family photographs, letters, diaries, stories, papers, etc. Basically anything that tells about our family and our ancestors. We plan to have everything digitized and the originals safely stored.

My mother's parents told her and her sister that their inheritance was their education (paid for by their parents), their self-sufficiency, and their character. My grandparents died leaving behind a lot of money and property. It all went to charity with my mom and my aunt's full blessing and respect for their parents' wishes.

Now DH's mother and her sister have been fighting since birth over who would inherit the estate of their parents. The two don't speak and we've constantly heard nothing but negative things about the other from both of them. Both of MIL's parents are dead now and it's been a serious nightmare watching the two sisters fight it out. Honestly, it's shameful.

[hawkeye]

Sigh.

This is my MIL.

She has been divorced thrice and was laid off about 3 years ago I think. She has since cashed in her retirement just to be able to live/survive, but hey! No worries kids! I've got an inheritance coming at me, so I think instead of getting a regular job I'll start my own company in REAL ESTATE AND DECORATING and wait on the money from Grandma.

Did I mention that Grandma will probably live to be 115? And that my H and I are both only children?

So what's more likely? MIL ends up wealthy from inheritance and successful business venture or H and I end up taking care of her?

[NitaX]

Jul 26, 2012 12:08:09 GMT -5 wawa said:

Jul 26, 2012 11:58:32 GMT -5 sonrisa said:

This article is about the parents of boomers. If you are 48-66 and both your parents are still living, you are very lucky.

really? I'd think the low end of that it wouldn't be that surprising for parents to still be living.

People had kids younger those days. So somebody in their early 50's likely has parents in their early 70's. That's not THAT old.

Yep. My great-great grandparents were sharecroppers and had kids very young. I'm talking like age 16. My great-great grandmother died when I was in grad school (I was 24). My mom is 53 and my grandmother is 70. So, this isn't totally out of the ordinary to me.

[msmerymac]

Both my parents were orphaned by the time they were 48. Fuck, my mom didn't have parents by the time she was in her early 30s. I think my dad was 38 and 47 when his parents died.

But my mom's mother died at age 54 and my dad's parents were 35 and 41 when he was born, so that might be an anomaly.