i just need to whine for a minute. not related to anything..

[jennlin]

my former bff got engaged over the weekend, and i didn't find out ahead of time.... he had planned a big surprise party for his gf, and got all his local (nyc) friends together to surprise her, so he's been planning it for a long time, and i found out only via FB.

he started out as my hubs bff, became "our" bff, but then i hated this new gf, so he retreated to just being my h's bff again....

so when my h emailed him a congrats, he responded saying he would've told us sooner, but we were traveling and it would've been too difficult for us to get to nyc with the kids.

1) this wasn't planned in a week, looking at his photos, this took months.
2) we would've made it to nyc for him, without a doubt, even though we don't like the girl

we've done a lot for him in our lives, and i feel like we "deserved" more..even though we weren't close anymore. when he and his ex wife split, he called us, and moved in with us the next day. he stayed with us for 5ish months. every time he comes back to visit (his parents are in e.wa), he flies into seattle, stays with us, borrows our car and drives it over to e.wa while h and i make it work with 1 car.

he was the "photographer" when h proposed to me, we called him first after we found out we were pregnant with both kids.....and it just hurts. it's sort of a confirmation that we're not the bff we used to be. i still don't like the girl.......but at least we don't see him much, right?  i miss his ex gf. i love his ex gf so much. i wish he could've married her.

/crying
/pitypartyfor1

[may]

Is he well aware you don't like her? Maybe that has a lot to do with it. Maybe he thought you wouldn't be so happy for him or even approve.

[jennlin]

Sept 30, 2014 9:40:11 GMT -5 may said:

Is he well aware you don't like her? Maybe that has a lot to do with it. Maybe he thought you wouldn't be so happy for him or even approve.

I hadn't expressed it since they first started dating in October 2012- and that was bc I was telling him she was childish. He was asking me to delete my posts off his exgfs FB page bc new gf was snooping, and it made her jealous that his friends liked his exgf....and that him and exgf were still technically together when him and newgf met.

I've only met her once, and that's when she stayed at my house. I might've given her dirty looks whenever she came inside bc my daughter would walk up to her, say hi, and motion for a hug, and new gf didn't even acknowledge her as a person. That's what made me solidify my dislike for her.

She also didn't like it that I "brought up the past"....bc it was her first time in Seattle, we were driving by and I pointed out an apt building, and I said "he used to live here when we first met"...and to her, it meant, "that's where he was living with his wife when he was happily married". And apparently it pissed her off, made her fight with BFF, and things have not been the same with me and him since.

Since he lives in NYC, it's difficult to kiss and makeup, and it's easy to write off a friendship.....but he has stayed in once a month ish contact with h.

[sarack]

i'm sorry.

[may]

Difficult situation. I guess he wants to make her happy by acknowledging her feelings.

[jennlin]

thanks for listening to me whine guys.