I've been talking to him for 2 years, it's been hard to just stop. We haven't been talking nearly as much, and only online chat (vs skype). He did send me a jerky email and later apologized for how rude it was, but he was still wary about the whole situation.
Red flag.
He sounds really cuckoo. I hope you stop talking to him soon. You are a beautiful girl. You don't need this kind of crazy fool in your life.
That guy is a crazy cakes liar and you saw his ugly side. There were huge red flags everywhere and I agree with the rest that you dodged a bullet. Why in the world are you still communicating with him? Please don't get sucked in again. You may not be so lucky next time.
I think people are doubting the part that a Customs/Border Patrol officer would have access to information about someone getting fired/not getting fired from a position,
and that the information would be passed on to someone else at a border crossing.
They're also WTF-ing that you're still in contact after the asshole email he sent/general cabin weirdness.
Because no one is this stupid irl. well, maybe they are, but in your case it just seems like you want attention on a message board. Also, the whole border crossing story seems too strange to be true. Sorry.
You are embarrassing Canada right now, woman. Why are you still giving this sketchy loser the time of day? You are one hundred percent wasting your time. You're pretty and you seem sweet. You can get other guys. Stop it!
Because no one is this stupid irl. well, maybe they are, but in your case it just seems like you want attention on a message board. Also, the whole border crossing story seems too strange to be true. Sorry.
I didn't ask them questions because I didn't want to make us wait any longer than we already had been. They asked if he actually existed because they couldn't find him in the system. They wanted to know if I was actually going to visit someone or if I made it up. This surprised me, because if you recall, the border guard in Detroit said they looked him up and he was "fired" not "laid off". Anyway, my mom knew about the guy I was going to visit and didn't really say anything.
Well this confirms for me that the last time no one found anything about him in the system, and the border guard gave you a hard time because what you told him you were doing was stupid. I don't believe that the border guard before told you anything about him. I do believe that he just questioned your story because it was so ridiculous.
But the fact that you continued to stay in touch with someone after you believed that a border guard hinted that there was something legally wrong with him says volumes, especially after the conversation that you C&Ped here with the guy.
Because no one is this stupid irl. well, maybe they are, but in your case it just seems like you want attention on a message board. Also, the whole border crossing story seems too strange to be true. Sorry.
Yeah, this is what I was getting at with my post too.
Just a few months ago, supposedly Border Patrol knew so much about this guy, including his employment status. Now, they don't even know who he is or whether he exists? BUT, they asked you about it anyway.
If you're going to make up stories, please pay attention to detail and use some basic logic. Thanks.
Yes. I'm side-eyeing the mother in this situation. Sounds like she prefers to keep her head in the sand.
Secondly, what does this say about you? Why is it difficult for you to stop talking to him? I know "it's been two years," but I think he showed you enough disrespect and sufficient red flags to ease your pain. Do you not feel that you're worth more than this?
Cut your losses.
And what is he "wary" about? Is he spinning this like he has a reason to not trust YOU?
If any of this is/was real, your reactions, as well as your mother's reactions don't make any effin' sense. Why would you have any interest in talking to him? Why is your mother seemingly indifferent to the fact that you were almost turned into a skin suit and THAT YOU STILL TALK TO HIM? Why does the border patrol give such a shit about you if the dude "doesn't exist"...if he doesn't exist (aside from the fact that they had a lot of info on him just a month ago) why would they possibly have you flagged for an imaginary friend?
Another part of me thinks it could be true, because off the wall stuff happens every day.
But it does feel like a big chunk of the story is missing.
I had a friend who would come out with all these stories about how she did this or that, about this happening and that happening. Turns out, she never left her house, she invented it all. And because I've known people like that, I'm having a hard time believing.
If any of it is indeed true, she's nuts for still talking to him and she's clearly inviting trouble in. And whose to say she wouldn't attempt it again?
Oy. This is making my head hurt. OP isn't a liar. She's dumb. She tells the border guard that she's going to meet some stranger at his cabin, and this raises a red flag like it would for ANY REASONABLE HUMAN. So in the course of questioning her he makes a flip remark about how lawyers are never laid off, they're fired and she goes all "ZOMG!! THE BORDER GUARD KNOWS SOMETHING I DON'T!!! OHEMGEEEE!!!111!1" She then sends cabin dude an e-mail saying "They told me at the border that it says in your super secret national security file that you were fired for embezzlement and also I suspect you're a murderer/rapist so I'm not coming after all." And he's all WTF?!? because he is NOT a murderer/rapist/embezzler rather, he just wanted some casual sex while he was on vacation at his cottage. All the dude is guilty of is wanting casual sex. SHE on the other hand, is fucking crazy. YOU'RE WELCOME FOR THE CLARIFICATION.
*yes, I am a long-time creepy lurker and I'm pissed that THIS is what aggravated me enough to finally post. It's making me rage-y that people don't seem to see what's really happening
Oy. This is making my head hurt. OP isn't a liar. She's dumb. She tells the border guard that she's going to meet some stranger at his cabin, and this raises a red flag like it would for ANY REASONABLE HUMAN. So in the course of questioning her he makes a flip remark about how lawyers are never laid off, they're fired and she goes all "ZOMG!! THE BORDER GUARD KNOWS SOMETHING I DON'T!!! OHEMGEEEE!!!111!1" She then sends cabin dude an e-mail saying "They told me at the border that it says in your super secret national security file that you were fired for embezzlement and also I suspect you're a murderer/rapist so I'm not coming after all." And he's all WTF?!? because he is NOT a murderer/rapist/embezzler rather, he just wanted some casual sex while he was on vacation at his cottage. All the dude is guilty of is wanting casual sex. SHE on the other hand, is fucking crazy. YOU'RE WELCOME FOR THE CLARIFICATION.
*yes, I am a long-time creepy lurker and I'm pissed that THIS is what aggravated me enough to finally post. It's making me rage-y that people don't seem to see what's really happening