As you may remember we are expecting DHs grandpa to pass anytime.
Today I heard him talking to DS and heard him say, "you'll be seeing a lot of your cousins soon."
I asked when and he responded, "at the funeral."
I hadn't planned on taking DS to the funeral. My parents already offered to keep him. I feel like it would be very difficult for him to understand the need for reverence and well, he's 4.
Apparently DH doesn't agree.
Grandpa has 54 grand, great-grand, and great-great-grandkids not including spouses. I had planned on DS going to the wake.
I really don't see a real reason for DS to go to the funeral. If he were 8-9 I think I'd feel differently.
He and his cousins will probably run around outside the room where the service is held. I've never seen small Children sit through the actual service. He'll be fine.
I went to my grandfathers funeral when I was 4 and it was an open casket, I don't recommend that
I went to my grandfather's funeral at the same age, also open casket, and I didn't have any issue with it. My memories of it are of feeling sad but also peaceful at the same time. I think it all depends on the kid.
If your H wants him to go, I think he should. Death is a part of the world we live in and kids are pretty resilient.
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I am sorry for your loss. I'll say that one of my most vivid memories from childhood is when my grandfather died and my parents wouldn't let me go to the funeral. I can recall being upset about not getting to say goodbye, having dinner at the neighbor's house (fried chicken), getting tucked into my parents bed that night. I wish my parents had taken me. Again, I am so sorry for your loss.
Post by awkwardpenguin on Oct 26, 2014 0:20:31 GMT -5
I'm sorry for your loss. I remember going to my grandmother's funeral when I was 5 and it was good for me to learn about death and grieving. I think he's probably old enough to understand a lot.
I spent today at a funeral and there were children there, from about 1 yr+. For the most part they ran around and played together. During the actual service they sat quietly with there parents. (Some had iPads and some just sat there.)
I am sorry for your loss. I'll say that one of my most vivid memories from childhood is when my grandfather died and my parents wouldn't let me go to the funeral. I can recall being upset about not getting to say goodbye, having dinner at the neighbor's house (fried chicken), getting tucked into my parents bed that night. I wish my parents had taken me. Again, I am so sorry for your loss.
I would also like to add I am so sorry for your loss.
The same thing happened to me. It was my fav grandpa that died, and I didn't get the chance to say goodbye, and to this day it still bothers me. If your H feels he should go, then yes by all means, but stay close and explain it in a way that he will understand and not be so scared.