Reassure me please?

[Deleted]

I'm not ruining my kid by doing CIO right? Gawd. I was so anti-CIO before now but we're desperate. E was waking up every hour and it was getting to both  H and I. So, we're on day 7 or 8 of CIO and it still sucks. Sometimes he'll go right back down but other times (like now) he'll cry for an hour or so. 

I feel like I've failed him by resorting to CIO. I feel like I gave up on him. And his cries kill me. 

[teatimefor2]

No, you are teaching him to self sooth, a tool that he will benefit from his whole life. CIO is hard, but the benefits are huge. My DS was cried so badly that first night and it was over in three nights. He's been a fantastic ( knock on wood) sleeper since then.

Hugs, it will get better.

[greencrayon]

Hugs.

[Deleted]

No! You're doing great and he will be fine! My "up every 2 hours" DD now sleeps 11-13 hours at night (we sleep trained months and months ago). It was SO worth it once she figured it out. It also took longer than 8 days to fully sttn so don't give up! I gave up too early a few times and now regret it.

I know it's so so so hard but you aren't ruining him. Hugs! It will be better soon and so worth it.

[dulcemariamar]

Everything will be okay! I did CIO with my DD. It was hard but it really was the best parenting decision for us. Are you doing checks? We couldn't do them with my LO . It would just make her more mad.

[auntie]

We did Ferber at 4 months. Not some generic CIO. DS didn't cry after the 3rd night; maybe because he was younger. DS still needed to get up once at night to nurse until he was about 9 months old; but it cut down the drama of getting him back to sleep. As he transitioned to STTN, he would sometimes wake, talk a bit and then go back to sleep.

[cece]

It's hard, but just know he won't remember this. Everyone will be much better off once you get through this, and you will get through this.

[stacyb1983]

(Hugs)

[Velar Fricative]

What exactly have you been doing? Did you read any sleep training books? We did Ferber which is a type of CIO and it worked wonderfully for us, even though those nights were really hard. DD turned out fine and is a great sleeper now. But anyway, depending on what you've been doing this last week, you might need a more structured plan.

Anyway, I figured when she was waking up every hour, the options we had were:

1) Let it continue and wait it out (we were turning into zombies at work, so this was no longer an option even though we did give it quite a bit of time)
2) Bedshare (both DH and I felt uncomfortable with this option for several reasons)
3) Read Ferber and implement (the choice we made since we felt like we had nothing to lose at this desperate point and our options were limited)

So thanks to reading Ferber, I learned that her hourly wakeups were due to her not being able to transition between the shorter sleep cycles babies have. I had never been able to put her down "drowsy but awake" and always nursed her to sleep, which worked okay until that pesky thing called "object permanence" surfaced. I can only speak for myself, but it made me feel better to read the science behind sleep and develop a better understanding of why DD was waking up hourly (beyond just, you know, being a baby) and thus I felt better about taking steps to help her put herself to sleep since she was going to need to do that someday!

Also, at 8 months there could be other factors at play - teething, illness, etc. Can you tell if there are any teeth popping through?

Good luck, hang in there.