Am I mean?

[catsarecute]

I told my SIL that she was welcome to come up and hang out right now (2:15) if she was bored. She wrote back asking if she and her mom can come up at 6:30 to visit together.
I told her that dd usually takes a short nap at that time, then my husband gets home after working 14 hours, does bath with her, she eats and goes to bed. He gets 45 minutes with us before I go to bed as well. I'm protective of our time together as a family, especially these days when I barely see DH all week. And messing with DD's routine isn't something I'm willing to do.
Does that make me mean, for essentially telling them not to come up tonight? They wanted to come up yesterday as well, but it was also during her nap.

[winemaker06]

Nope. I would do exactly the same thing!

[redheadk]

Nope. Not at all.

Out of curiosity, how old is your DD?

[Ashley&Scott]

Not at all.

"That's too close to bedtime, sorry".

[mellimel19]

Nope. They can come by another time.

[rbp]

WTF. You invited her to come over at 2:15 and she said "see ya at 6:30!"?

No. Just no.

[ECB]

Oct 27, 2014 16:42:45 GMT -5 rbp said:

WTF. You invited her to come over at 2:15 and she said "see ya at 6:30!"?

No. Just no.

See, this - SHE was the rude one, not you. You gave her a time. She didn't say "no", she said "I'd rather do ___". It's fine, but it's also ABSOLUTELY fine for you to say "no".

When DS was napping, I was VERY protective of his naps. Dont' 2nd guess yourself.

[Sloane]

Do they see your family often?

[catsarecute]

Oct 27, 2014 16:30:55 GMT -5 redheadk said:

Nope. Not at all.

Out of curiosity, how old is your DD?

6 months

[catsarecute]

Oct 27, 2014 16:53:11 GMT -5 Sloane said:

Do they see your family often?

About every other weekend. They are welcome to visit on weekends and generally do unless we have plans.

[catsarecute]

Oct 27, 2014 16:42:45 GMT -5 rbp said:

WTF. You invited her to come over at 2:15 and she said "see ya at 6:30!"?

No. Just no.

She was wanting to wait for her mom to get home from work so she could see DD too. But yeah, that wasn't the invite time.

[redheadk]

Oct 27, 2014 17:17:56 GMT -5 catsarecute said:

Oct 27, 2014 16:53:11 GMT -5 Sloane said:

Do they see your family often?

About every other weekend. They are welcome to visit on weekends and generally do unless we have plans.

That is plenty of family togetherness.

[pinotgrig]

I'm learning that I'M the one who pays for it (via motn wakeups) when we mess with what little schedule G has. It's made me a lot more wiling to say "no" to people.

[catsarecute]

Oct 27, 2014 17:20:06 GMT -5 redheadk said:

Oct 27, 2014 17:17:56 GMT -5 catsarecute said:

About every other weekend. They are welcome to visit on weekends and generally do unless we have plans.

That is plenty of family togetherness.

Haha! She is the first grandchild/niece so they want to see her all the time. I get it but I need to spend time as a family of 3 as well and I think they don't quite see that sometimes.

[bananapancakes]

Not at all. 6:30 is a terrible time for a visit. L is already asleep by then. You are totally not mean!

[livinitup]

Being honest isn't mean. Saying yes when you mean no and then resenting the shit out of your guests ... yeah, that's mean.

[lilac05]

I don't think it's mean at all. Maybe next time you can be a little more direct to keep it from happening more often. "The best time for us is from X-Y on these days. The evenings are really crazy for us right now and don't work well for having company. I'll let you know when/if the schedule changes. We're looking forward to seeing you next weekend!"

[rbp]

Oct 27, 2014 17:31:23 GMT -5 catsarecute said:

Oct 27, 2014 17:20:06 GMT -5 redheadk said:

That is plenty of family togetherness.

Haha! She is the first grandchild/niece so they want to see her all the time. I get it but I need to spend time as a family of 3 as well and I think they don't quite see that sometimes.

My MIL sees M at least once a week. I love her very much, but I'm not going to alter his schedule to her convenience. She said she was coming to visit at 9:30 on Saturday morning, which would have been great as he was just finishing nursing. But by the time she showed up at 10:05, he was a cranky mess and I was putting him down for a nap, so she had to wait for an hour until he woke up. Sorry, MIL.

[cece]

Not mean at all. Smart, in fact.