I am having a mommy martyr kind of day

[cjeanette]

I need to vent. Feel free to mock or eye roll at me.

The kids have their Halloween parties this Friday at school. I am the room parent in C's room and no one signed up to coordinate or co-coordinate the party. I even sent out an e-mail asking for help. I got an offer of money. So I have to plan and run the party alone. I just dropped $60 a Target for the party supplies and the stuff to make the drinks I signed up for E's class. I don't think I will even get to see E's party.

I also had to pick up items for Boo bags since we were Booed last night. Everything fun was picked over.

I am trying to plan a Girl Scout meeting for tomorrow and am so nervous as I am very much an introvert and leading a group of girls is stressing me out. Of course I got this job as no one else wanted it and if I didn't the girls wouldn't have a troop. So there goes hours of my time.

I forgot that tonight is a committee meeting for our PTA auction. I don't have time for this. It's our big fundraiser and I want to be a part of it but tonight is the only night this week I don't have to coach cheer or lead a girl scout meeting. I have crap to do. Trying to con H into going for me.

C just had a soccer game scheduled for 8:40 Saturday morning. Friday night is Halloween. WHO THOUGHT THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA???

I looked at my calender for next week and realized it is even worse than this week.

Why do I do this to myself?

[Deleted]

because you are an awesome mom!

[ssmjlm]

Dude, complain away.

I would probably have sent out a nasty email saying "if no one volunteers for the halloween party, there won't be one" but nicer put.

[cjeanette]

Oct 28, 2014 13:28:34 GMT -5 ssmjlm said:

Dude, complain away.

I would probably have sent out a nasty email saying "if no one volunteers for the halloween party, there won't be one" but nicer put.

We still have a Holiday Party, Valentines, and two teachers gifts.  I can't piss these people off yet.  By Valentines it might be on though.

[vanillacourage]

OMG just reading that was stressful.

Do you get money from the PTA?

[cjeanette]

Oct 28, 2014 13:32:11 GMT -5 vanillacourage said:

OMG just reading that was stressful.

Do you get money from the PTA?

Money for the parties?  No.  The PTA pays for enough stuff like field trips, library books, and science enrichment.  Remember which state I am in and who governs it

Did I mention this auction has to raise 30k?  So...you know....no pressure there.

[Deleted]

That is a lot. Don't worry though--I'm sure the kids will have a great time. don't stress about the Girl Scouts. The biggest issue there will be getting them quiet long enough to pay attention.

And for the fundraiser, see if anyone will donate Chiefs tickets they aren't planning to use. Auctioning or raffle-ing those was what my mom always did for our school fundraisers. They would make a ton of money. I'm sure the same if you can get any KU/KSU/MU tickets.

I would totally not do boo bags if you haven't already.

[cjeanette]

Well H went to the auction committee meeting for me and I am skipping cupcakes for girl scouts. Boom.

[pugz]

I don't know how you juggle all of it C! You are an awesome mom

[whitepicketfence]

That's certainly a lot on your plate! You are an awesome mom. I honestly don't know how you juggle it all.

Hugs!

[jeaniebueller]

Oct 28, 2014 23:21:09 GMT -5 farmvillelover said:

i've often wondered how you do so much as an awesome working professional mom. i admire you. and it's ok to delegate or just say no to what you can't or don't want to handle.

Ditto! Remember, its okay to say no or scale back given the lack of contribution from other parents in the class.

[hermione]

While everything you listed is wonderful and you sound like a GREAT mom, I think you need to learn how to say no. If there's no scout troop for a year, someone else will step up or you can move your daughter to another troop.

[ECB]

Oct 28, 2014 23:10:14 GMT -5 @bluesky said:

I wonder if nobody is volunteering to be a party planner because they are confused? In my area, it is the room parent's job to party plan. So maybe they expect you to do it and the request is too vague??

This.  At DSs school, the room parent coordinates.  however, there are 3 of them (I think) who all work together.

For DSs Halloween party, they sent out a sign-up genius link and listed what was needed for the party and asked for people to sign up.  Everything was taken pretty quickly.

Maybe an idea for next time?

[SJ]

I'm sorry- it does sound like a crazy week.

I agree that the "sign-ups" need to be active vs. passive. Not just "hey write back if you want to work" but "Susie, can you bring cups for the Halloween party? John, can you provide drinks?" People are much more likely to agree to active and direct requests than a general email.

[cjeanette]

Oct 28, 2014 23:10:14 GMT -5 @bluesky said:

I wonder if nobody is volunteering to be a party planner because they are confused? In my area, it is the room parent's job to party plan. So maybe they expect you to do it and the request is too vague?? It might help to use a website and list everything you need and send an email out for people to sign up online. Just a thought.

All that stuff... you are overextended!!! It's easy to let that happen (been there, done that). I'd focus on what is most important to YOU and don't sweat the rest.

No, there are sign ups at back to school night in Aug.  Room parent is clearly different from those who coordinate the party. It has been this way as long as I have been a parent there.

When I e-mail and ask for a coordinator they know what I am needing.  I provide the list of who signed up for what as well.

[cjeanette]

Oct 28, 2014 23:21:09 GMT -5 farmvillelover said:

i've often wondered how you do so much as an awesome working professional mom. i admire you. and it's ok to delegate or just say no to what you can't or don't want to handle.

I took a job that doesn't care if I randomly leave at 1:30 on a Friday to run a party or 10 minutes early on a Wed to pick E up from trampoline class.  

Seriously, we both have super flexible jobs and it has saved us so much stress.  We both could be making a lot more but this is more important to us.  I have made peace with the fact that we aren't really lean in people.

[cjeanette]

Oct 29, 2014 8:14:01 GMT -5 ECB said:

Oct 28, 2014 23:10:14 GMT -5 @bluesky said:

I wonder if nobody is volunteering to be a party planner because they are confused? In my area, it is the room parent's job to party plan. So maybe they expect you to do it and the request is too vague??

This.  At DSs school, the room parent coordinates.  however, there are 3 of them (I think) who all work together.

For DSs Halloween party, they sent out a sign-up genius link and listed what was needed for the party and asked for people to sign up.  Everything was taken pretty quickly.

Maybe an idea for next time?

We do that for school wide events all the time.  Classroom parties we don't.  It isn't a problem in the smaller grades but once you hit 3rd or 4th you start to lose your helpers.

I did also notice that all my really helpful parents (I have been room mother most years) are in other classes this year.  I got the dud class I guess.

[mannah]

Can someone please explain what getting booed means in this context?

[cjeanette]

Oct 29, 2014 8:34:09 GMT -5 mannah said:

Can someone please explain what getting booed means in this context?

christmas.organizedhome.com/crafts/halloween/boo-youve-been-booed-poem-signs

[cjeanette]

Oct 29, 2014 8:41:04 GMT -5 @choco said:

You are super mom and you are awesome. I hope you the rest of the week and next week fly by without too much causing you stress. That is a lot on your plate. Glad your H also pitched in for the auction meeting! IMO, that's probably the easiest since you just need to reach out to select folks to donate for the auction. I've done many of those while we were in FL and figured out the game quickly, lol.

His job is to contact mircobrewries for donations.  Considering he has a family friend and I have cousin who are in business together and own one I think he got the easy job. lol.

I asked him which committee he was placed on when they formed them.  I got a blank stare.  lol

[mannah]

Oct 29, 2014 8:36:25 GMT -5 cjeanette said:

Oct 29, 2014 8:34:09 GMT -5 mannah said:

Can someone please explain what getting booed means in this context?

christmas.organizedhome.com/crafts/halloween/boo-youve-been-booed-poem-signs

Thanks. That sounds fun but yeah a lot of work especially when you are already so busy. I hope these next couple weeks fly by.