Inviting yourself to Thanksgiving

[toepick]

I'm not going home for Thanksgiving this year because it's so expensive and close to Christmas.  For the past few years, I have had Thanksgiving with friends and their family and was planning to do so this year as well.  However, they now need to travel out-of-town and aren't hosting.  Problem is that other people who would include me assume I have plans.  So unless I want to sit at home by myself, I need to bring it up and essentially invite myself to Thanksgiving.  This feels so rude but I know that they would feel horrible if they knew I was home alone.  

I guess I need to come right out and ask about their plans and tell them mine fell through.

[soozy87]

"Hey, I know that friend that would normally invite me is going to be out of town, just wondering if you guys are planning something or if you wanted me to host this year!"

[toepick]

Ooooh - offering to host is a good idea.

[toepick]

Nov 10, 2014 9:46:53 GMT -5 tillie said:

Would these people ever ask you what your doing for TG? Do you plan on seeing them before? If I knew any of my friends would be alone on TG I would definitely want them to come with me, and I bet your friends feel the same way.

They definitely think I 'm going to the other friends' house because I have for several years.   So unless I bring it up, they won't ask.  And I know they would want me to join, I just feel awkward bringing it up! 

[toepick]

I just sent this to a friend who I don't think has family in for the holiday: "Do you guys have plans for Thanksgiving? I was going to join XX but they had a change of plans are going out of town. I'm happy to have you over if you don't care if I serve something other than turkey!"

Chances are they will just invite me to their house but I would be willing to host, and now I don't feel rude!

[sjh722]

Nov 10, 2014 9:49:50 GMT -5 tillie said:

Well, in that case I'd probably try to bring up TG in a conversation and smoothly "let it be known" that you don't have any plans and see how they react, lol.

Same.

I would feel awful if a friend were sitting at home alone on a holiday and I didn't ask him/her over.

[ECB]

I'm sure your friends will invite you! I know I would I'm always up for inviting people who can't be with family.

[dragonfly08]

Assuming I'd be willing to follow through, I'd invite people over. Hopefully, they'd either come or say "sorry, we're hosting, but why don't you join us?" Either way, there's be plans! Start with just one couple (b/c if one accepts and one declines but invites you, you're on the hook to host even if you'd rather be with those who invited you!) and go from there.

[stealthmom]

I would just message everyone- hey friends! I find myself an orphan for thanksgiving this year. Does anyone's table have room for one more? I make kickass ________ that I'd love to bring!

I would be mega upset if I found out a friend was by herself on t-giving.

[toepick]

I got an invite! All is good. The offer to host totally worked - got me an invite without being rude and I don't have to cook a turkey. I have volunteered to make my two favorite side dishes.

[toepick]

Also - one year I will realize my goal of a turkey-free Thanksgiving. My friend who was originally hosting had planned to serve beef and I was ecstatic.