I finally lost it

[decemberrain]

On my mother-in-law. went all ---> :@ on her. The proverbial straw that broke the camels back:
I got a message this morning first thing I see when I wake up. Doesn't help her case that I am the worlds MOST grumpy morning person.
MIL: I've sent C(my H) A BUNCH of messages on here. He doesn't ever answer me. Why??
Me: umm I'm not sure. I can ask.
MIL: you've only had him away from me two months and you're already turning him against me. I am done.

Yep. That was it. one tiny contraction. Or rather, the implication behind said contraction.

I wen't off. Not only on her but (a little childishly) posted quite a long post on FB just short of naming names about the entire situation. How has it turned into my responsibility to make sure H is talking to his mother? How has it somehow turned into me "turning him against her"? gaaaaaah even being across the world hasn't stopped this drama ridden woman from getting under my skin.

On a brighter note: H's Dad and Step-mom called us tonight and are trying to save up enough money and F.F points to come visit. It'll be the first time in 8 years that H has seen his Dad in person. We are really hoping they can make it out!!

[ilovelamp]

Yikes. That sucks, I'm sorry. Is your H avoiding her on purpose? I feel like he should be dealing with her/this situation, definitely not you.

[sookie]

We must have the same MIL. I finally decided I won't be speaking to her any longer. She's aware that I will continue to encourage Mr. Sookie to have a relationship with her and will help remind him to call her, however any calls to my phone will be sent to voicemail and left unreturned.

[decemberrain]

He is just busy. He says he reads her messages at work because she sends them around 9 a.m our time which is 7p.m at home and just doesn't have time to answer them or forgets. Honestly I don't know. I told him he needs to deal with this because I can only take so much. This isn't the first time nor will it be the last that she's been like this but I don't think I'll ever get used to being genuinely hated by someone who is supposed to be such a big part of our lives.

[decemberrain]

Aug 2, 2012 9:20:27 GMT -5 sookie said:

We must have the same MIL. I finally decided I won't be speaking to her any longer. She's aware that I will continue to encourage Mr. Sookie to have a relationship with her and will help remind him to call her, however any calls to my phone will be sent to voicemail and left unreturned.

I always tell H to call her or talk to her and he never seems that interested. I am just guessing here so I could be wrong, I think he just needs time away from her. She is one of those suffocating people, she just smothers him and I can only imagine that he is just trying to create some space there. But like I said I'm just guessing. I ask him and he doesn't have a lot to say about it. He said once that he feels guilty for having the feelings toward her that he does and that's all I've ever gotten out of him.

[Deleted]

That sounds like my almost xmil! She blamed me for STBXH washing out of his career field. And I'm to blame for our divorce. It's the woman's job to keep a family together, yo!

Nailed it.

[decemberrain]

Aug 2, 2012 10:10:41 GMT -5 @lemonlover33 said:

That sounds like my almost xmil! She blamed me for STBXH washing out of his career field. And I'm to blame for our divorce. It's the woman's job to keep a family together, yo!

Nailed it.

Did she also tell everyone that you forced him into the service?? That was the big thing before he left for BMT. I forced him to join the A.F so I could live off him and not have to work. Like he isn't a grown man who makes his own choices. I supported him I did not push him I guess that there isn't a difference. I am also not "aloud" to have babies until we are married for 7 years. (coming from a woman who got pregnant in high school back when that was a HUGE deal). Some day I hope to be that AWESOME MIL that loves her child and their spouse but isn't a complete psychopath.

[sookie]

Aug 2, 2012 10:29:44 GMT -5 decemberrain said:

Aug 2, 2012 10:10:41 GMT -5 @lemonlover33 said:

That sounds like my almost xmil! She blamed me for STBXH washing out of his career field. And I'm to blame for our divorce. It's the woman's job to keep a family together, yo!

Nailed it.

Did she also tell everyone that you forced him into the service?? That was the big thing before he left for BMT. I forced him to join the A.F so I could live off him and not have to work.

Thank God he was already in before we met, otherwise I would've heard that. HOWEVER, did you know that I can control where we're stationed AND I hand a hand in putting him in Texas since I'm from here?! Yep, it's true. One day I just dialed up good ol' President Bush and was like "yo homie, I'm gonna need you to keep x base open and then make sure my soon-to-meet/marry Mr. Sookie is stationed there". I'm paraphrasing obviously, but that's the gist of the conversation I had with him (I'm guessing). The fact that we haven't moved in 10 years is on me for sure though.

Also, apparently when I quit my job (not laid off as I was led to believe) it was to live off of the bank we were making during deployment. Too bad he came home.