Daycare Vs. Nanny

[curbsideprophet]

We thought about having a nanny but decided to go with daycare. DD probably got sick more often, but at this point I do not regret our decision to use daycare instead of a nanny.

[fbf2006]

I would probably choose daycare because of the huge difference in cost. What is the logistics with the drop off/pick up from daycare? Would it be totally inconvenient?

[GailGoldie]

things to consider - what will you do on days nanny is sick? emergencies she has, etc? If she quits and you suddenly need care?

accountability is why I prefer a center 100%... i don't trust one person in my home all day to care for my child in a great way. I know there are many great nannies- and there are also many horrible ones and it wasn't worth the risk for me to test it out. For me a nanny would be cheaper than 3 in daycare... but i still prefer to pay more for a daycare center. Esp after the horror stories i have read online and heard from IRL friends (one recently found out her nanny was stealing from her wallet every morning... had her arrested - horrible).

kids in daycare get sick more - but i used to teach K and the kids who started K and never went to daycare before got sick a lot that year... so it's now or later - but their first year in any school type setting will = more sick.

I love the interaction my kids get with other people and the cool experiences they have had at daycare. They have made great friends - and so have I (the other parents and teachers). We're leaving our daycare next month and i'm VERY sad about it. (all 3 boys are starting in our public school for preK and K).

so- it's a very personal choice.

[Tea-rific]

We are starting DS in a center next week. We considered a nanny (or in home daycare) but decided on a center because we liked the idea of having more accountability and more eyes on DS's providers.

We had orientation this week, and while I am sad about going back to work, I feel totally comfortable with our decision.

[hannamaren]

We are going with Nanny because our hours dont work with daycare. We only need 2-3 days a week but 12 hours a day. I dont want my child in daycare at 7pm.
Also, we both have the kind of jobs where you cant leave on a moments notice and it is a really big deal to call in sick especially often. For me, we have to close the store (huge deal) and for my H-he could be in court, at a deposition, out of town.
So we are paying more for less worries.
I also have no worries about leaving my child with a good .nanny. My bff has an amazing Nanny and I think with references it can work.

[froggy76]

We went with a daycare primarily because of accountability. We found a very small place with only 3 infants and the same teacher taking care of them all the time, with help from others if she needs it. I also like the socialization that DD is getting. Even when she started at 5 months, she LOVED watching the other kids.

There's a lot of variety in daycares, so it might just be a matter of finding the right fit if you don't want to go with a nanny.

[atouchofklasse]

We could afford a nanny but LOVE having him in a center. Part of this is his very active, wild, social personality. I can't imagine him being at home with a nanny (or parent) all day. He'd be a lot less happy.

[fortmyersbride]

I think if you have a job with normal hours and the ability to take sick days, a daycare can be a great way to go. You don't have to deal with the PITA of hiring and keeping a nanny, and the payroll issues.

We have used nanny care since DS was an infant. The process of hiring a nanny is laborious. But we both have jobs that entail being at work before DCs open. And some days we both work 14 or so hours. And neither one of us can call in sick. But if it weren't for all these things, I think DC could be great.

[Deleted]

If $ isn't an issue, I'd go with a nanny because it will be more convenient for YOU (no rushing to drop off/pick up at a certain time, no worries about what to do if LO is sick, if you pay enough you can ask her to some light cleaning and run easy errands for you, ect.) and it will be nice for your baby to get so much one-on-one time. Just make sure you hire someone energetic enough to take him places when he gets a little older and maybe ask her to do some classes or join a playgroup for the socialization aspect. I'd also look to start him in preschool around two so he gets some of the structure and socialization that daycare kids get.

[rubytuesday]

I didn't read the other replies so sorry if I duplicate anything.

We had a nanny and I didn't like it...

She had all of the same days off as me so there was never a time where I could take a day to run errands or anything kid free.

Also, at first, when they were itty-biities it was nice that they were home rather than a daycare setting but they grow so fast that by the time they were about 9 months old I didn't like that they were just hanging around the house all day with someone who wasn't me or my husband. It just stopped making sense to me. I felt like if they couldn't have that quality time with a parent then they should be doing something more stimulating than hanging around the house playing with the same toys, looking at the same walls, day after day after day.

I do have to say that not having to drop off/pick up was nice but it's a really small perk.

I never really worried about accountability. I think if you find a good nanny it will stop being a concern. You just know.

Eventually I decided to become a SAHM. If I hadn't I probably would have found a daycare.

[hocus]

We have a nanny and it was overall a good decision (and honestly our only decision due to no infant care centers around here). BTW there is nothing wrong with hiring a nanny for 3 months as long as you are up front about it. You never know who might be interested in a short term arrangement. Overall either option is fine. You'll just have to trust your gut.

There are things I don't like about our nanny but overall she is great with the kids and is reliable. I love that the kids get one on one time. She also takes them out everyday (we're within walking distance of a park, library, barns and noble). She arranges play dates. Right now I think my 2 (will be three in Dec) could benefit from a center. She's going to preschool in the fall in the AM. Next year when both kids are over 2 they'll got to daycare which has its own pluses and minuses.

[evynsmama]

Not sure why there is the thought that kids in daycare are sick more often. The kids I know who SAH get sick probably 5 times more often than my daughter does in daycare and her illnesses are pretty mild and my non-professional opinion is that being around other children & their germs builds immunities. You may keep them from toher kids germs now, but they may be more likely to pick something up at church, grocery store, restaurant, etc. and when they do start school all those germs will hit them at once.
DD has been in a family childcare since she was 13 weeks old and had the flu once and maybe 5 colds total only one ever resulting in an ear infection. The social interaction with other children of various ages is also a plus for daycare, DD's language and social skills are way ahead her cousin who is 2 weeks older and SAH with her grandma, but this could just be due to them being different children. Not to mention the 11k in savings. Good Luck with your decision. Also family childcares tend to be smaller and the children aren't segregated by age which helps with foster development and social skills as well.

[cosmowife]

I would KILL to net $20k after childcare expenses. That is a ton, in my mind. I am lucky if I will break even once I have two in daycare. So essentially, I will be working for free. Awesome.

To answer your question, I went with a center because I don't trust one person alone.

[anna7602]

Daycare wouldn't have worked for us at all because I needed more flexible hours.

Others have extolled the virtues of daycares, so I'll tell you what worked for us with a nanny:

1. exposure to another language

It was really important to me that we find a Spanish-speaking nanny since we were/are raising DD bilingual. Not only did we find one, but our nanny had other nanny friends in the neighborhood and made Spanish-language playdates for DD.

2. Easier to find an individual who shared my child-raising philosophies.

Our nanny wore DD in a carrier, and generally followed our lead in terms of sleep & eating habits. Maybe it's possible to find this in a daycare center, but since daycare wasn't a possibility for us, I never tried.

3. great for breastfeeding

The nanny was able to defrost BM from the freezer if necessary and leave it if not. We never wasted any milk the way I would have if I always had to defrost a certain amount to take to the daycare center every day.

Furthermore, at least around me, centers seemed to have rules about throwing out a bottle of BM if it wasn't fully consumed within a certain amount of time. (I distinctly remember friends complaining about how frustrating this was.)

4. no hectic mornings

I never had to get DD ready to leave the house. If she was still sleeping when I had to leave for work, then I let her keep sleeping.

5. outdoor time/activities for DD

Again, I have no idea what happens at a typical daycare center, but I liked that our nanny took DD to the playground, zoo and other outdoor spaces. I had a flexible enough schedule that I was able to do music, yoga & etc. classes with DD myself, but I know other moms whose nannies did these activities with their children.

DH's HR department did all the tax and insurance paperwork for us, so it didn't seem complicated at the time.

Is this all worth $11K? I have no idea. I have very casually looked at private bilingual schools for DD next year and tuition is about $26K-$31K per year.

[vegas]

I agree with Anna 100%. Those are all reasons we have LOVED having a nanny. My nanny moved away in June and DS starts school in August so we've had to put DS in daycare for 2 months. So far I've noticed that not only is he sick more often, but he's not learning as much as he did with the nanny. He used to practice letters and numbers and colors and had much more one on one attention and I think that really helped with both his mental and physical development. I loved the covnenience of a nanny and agree with anna that for breastfeeding it was awesome because day care had ridiculous rules when it came to storing and reusing breast milk that would = lots of wasted milk/time/money/effort. I think daycare is fine, don't get me wrong, but for 11K I'd go for a nanny.

[karinothing]

We do daycare and I love it. DS started at 6 months and was alreayd crawling so maybe that makes a difference.

The center is nextdoor to my work so logistically it works really well. They have a playground with a special section for those kids under 2 so they get mini sized playground equipment it is adorable. In the summer they also offer water play day (sprinklers, kiddie pools, etc). They offer music classes once a week (and sports camp for the older kids).

I feel like DS gets tons of attention (there are 4 other babies in his room, with two teachers). Whenever I go in there they are reading or singing or loving on the kids, so it seems like a good environment. DS has only gotten sick once since daycare and it was DH that gave him the cold.

There are two babies there that started around 6 weeks. They seem very happy. They also seem to get a lot of attention. But I can understand about being nervous. I am not sure I would have felt as comfortable sending DS to daycare before 6 months.

ETA: I will say that our daycare can not carry the kids in a wrap/sling for saftey reasons. They will allow us to store frozen breastmilk and they do follow many AP principals. IMO good daycares are going to be just as loving and caring as a good nanny.

[dcrunnergirl]

We picked daycare b/c 1) it was much more affordable to have our kids in in-home daycare than to get a nanny for two infants and 2) I felt like my kids would be bored staying at home all the time, even if they went out to the occasional activity or playdate. I liked that there would be new toys, experiences, and kids to play with all day long at daycare.

[quickstepstar]

We started off with a DC center when the girls were 3 months old. Mainly, because there was one at my school (I was a grad student at that time) and I liked having the girls so close by. They stayed for 3 months, when they were 6 months, we got a nanny for 2 reasons (1) the girls were ALWAYS sick, like every 3rd day I had to either pick someone up or stay home. It wasn't a huge deal, because I was just doing research and had a meeting twice a week, but it was still a pain, and (2) It seemed like the girls spent most of their day in bouncy chairs. I think it is so important to do floor time at that age, and there was just none of it!

So now for 3.5 years we have had nannies. I think we have had a grand total of 7 nannies, some good, some bad, but overall I think having a nanny make my life easier. For us, it is also a lot cheaper for 3 kids to have a nanny.

My youngest daughter is now 9 months old. When the oldest 2 start K, I am debating putting the youngest one into a daycare center. I still haven't decided. It will actually be cheaper for us at that point, but I am leaning towards a PT nanny + preschool, because the nanny would be able to drive the kids to activities, and make them dinner (which to me sounds exhausting after a long day of work).

Good luck with your decision!

[karinothing]

Aug 3, 2012 14:45:57 GMT -5 quickstepstar said:

We started off with a DC center when the girls were 3 months old. Mainly, because there was one at my school (I was a grad student at that time) and I liked having the girls so close by. They stayed for 3 months, when they were 6 months, we got a nanny for 2 reasons (1) the girls were ALWAYS sick, like every 3rd day I had to either pick someone up or stay home. It wasn't a huge deal, because I was just doing research and had a meeting twice a week, but it was still a pain, and (2) It seemed like the girls spent most of their day in bouncy chairs. I think it is so important to do floor time at that age, and there was just none of it!

So now for 3.5 years we have had nannies. I think we have had a grand total of 7 nannies, some good, some bad, but overall I think having a nanny make my life easier. For us, it is also a lot cheaper for 3 kids to have a nanny.

My youngest daughter is now 9 months old. When the oldest 2 start K, I am debating putting the youngest one into a daycare center. I still haven't decided. It will actually be cheaper for us at that point, but I am leaning towards a PT nanny + preschool, because the nanny would be able to drive the kids to activities, and make them dinner (which to me sounds exhausting after a long day of work).

Good luck with your decision!

Yeah, I wouldn't have liked that either. Our daycare has rules about floor time each day. I think with the littlest babies they have to do 30-60 minutes of tummy time. They are only allowed in the bouncy chair for a minimum amount of time too.

[GailGoldie]

Aug 3, 2012 13:09:24 GMT -5 cosmowife said:

I would KILL to net $20k after childcare expenses. That is a ton, in my mind. I am lucky if I will break even once I have two in daycare. So essentially, I will be working for free. Awesome.

To answer your question, I went with a center because I don't trust one person alone.

i have only been working for benefits the past 3 years. I'm jumping for joy that DS1 starts K in the fall, and my twins also got into a school run program for minimal costs... i'm finally making money again!