S/o pregnancy - doulas, better second birth experiences

[Deleted]

We had a doula for dd's birth (she's our only child right now), and she was wonderful. Her job was to keep H out of trouble and me from losing my mind. I Definitely would explore your options on the doula front.

[zeewifeandmama]

A doula could not have helped for my actual labor. but I kind of regret not having a post partum doula to support me after birth since people around me are not so great at that.

[Deleted]

My doula was amazing, both times. My DH is kind of an idiot when it comes to taking care of me, and she made him a rock star. She was calm and helped us know what to do (even when things went sideways). I'd 100% get a doula to help get through your reservations.

For #2, I moved some of my pre-birth appointments to post-birth. She made us a fabulous dinner the night I got home from the hospital, then stayed to hold the baby and help with DS while we ate it. Another time, she came over at 7 am and watched both children while we slept in on a Saturday morning. AMAZING. Doulas are how you hire the "perfect mom" to do exactly what your mom would do if she was a mind reader and 1000% supportive.

[Willis Jackson]

I think a doula would be great for your situation.

[Deleted]

I think a doula would help. I had a doula with J (wasn't actually there for the birth because I ended up with a c section when I went into labor and he was breech, we didn't think to call) but they helped me leading up to the birth a lot. I wanted a med free birth and ended up with the complete opposite. J was breech from 20w on and I knew if he didn't flip I would have a section. I had a lot of feelings to process over that and they helped me with that along the way.

We didn't have a double with the twins because it was really expensive and I didn't think my odds of a VBAC were that great. In the end I did VBAC and was fine without the doula but I definitely think they still could have helped.

[VillainV]

We had a doula, and she was amazing. We really clicked with her -- there were some doulas we met who I'm sure would have been fine, but we just didn't have the rapport with them.

#2 (still yet-to-be-conceived) will probably be RCS, but if we end up doing VBAC we will probably use a doula again :-)

[anna7602]

I had a doula both times and am so grateful for their presence. My 2nd birth was actually tougher than the first, but I was able to process the suckiness of it in the moment with my doula and not get too emotional about it after. I also think that having her there kept it from getting worse.