I feel like my grandmother is waiting to die

[Bernadine]

It's just....weird.  I'm having weird feelings.

She's 81.  She's in relatively good health for her age- high blood pressure, pre-diabetic, but no cancer or alzheimers or heart attacks or anything like that.  She's still somewhat involved in her church, but really has no interests other than that.  She keeps telling my mom that she's ready to go, and she's not afraid to die.  I know she's looking forward to being reunited with my grandfather and my uncle.  I think she just feels like she's lived her life, and there's nothing more for her to do here.

Idk.  It just makes me sad, but at the same time, she seems at peace with her life, so I am happy for that.

[AlpineSlide]

This is exactly how my grandma is. When my grandpa died 5 years ago she said she only wanted to live a couple more years. But she is very healthy. She is just so lonely. I feel bad for her.

[lilac05]

My grandpa was like that for a few years before he died. It made his passing so much easier. I still miss him dearly, but ultimately, I knew he was ready. The selfish part of me was so sad. The selfless part of me was so relieved & almost happy when get passed. Mixed emotions are to be expected. Grandparents are special people. We want them to b happy, but we don't want to lose them.

[knx9211]

My grandmother is 93. Every time we go to see her, she cries and asks why she can't die. It's the worst thing I've ever gone through. She can't really do anything for herself anymore, she's in nursing care. She can't walk or take care of herself. It's awful. I will be SO sad when she's gone, but a little relieved that she doesn't have to live like that.

I understand how you feel. It's sad to think she's ready to go and not afraid to. But at the same time, what your grandmother said is in part so wonderful. She feels good, but she's lived her life. And loved it. And she doesn't feel like she's got all of this left to do.

I don't make much sense today, but hugs from me. I understand how you feel.

[Miss Phryne Fisher]

That is how my grandma was. She died a few years ago at 86 years old. My grandpa died at 69, so she lived 17 years without him. She was very lonely too.

Big hugs, I know this is hard.

[gault]

My grandmother said the same thing for a few years before she passed away at 88.

Hugs.

[Muddled]

A couple of my older relatives have done that. It's always caused some internal conflict in me because I've felt selfish for wishing they'd stick around.

[Deleted]

My grandmother was like that. She told me she was waiting to die. She was just done. She wasn't involved. I think she just felt like she had completed her life.

[oswin]

My grandmother said something similar when we visited recently. She has severe chronic pain and limited mobility, so I kind of get it, but it still was kind of a shock and sad. I'm just glad that she got to meet DD.

[lissaholly]

I think one thing I am more aware of with my last grandparent is that death is something that people need to talk it out about. They talk about friends dying. They talk about things they want to leave behind for you and people they want to see again in the afterlife.

It's very logical, because I like to talk about the next steps in my life all the time ( Hey big 4-0! Do you know how much I don't want tower you?!) it is also very fucking hard to think about people dying let alone talk to hem about it. Death is very hard on the living. Sorry.

[gretchenindisguise]

My grandma has been saying she's ready to go since about 75. She turns 86 in March. But since moving her out here, I think she really loves seeing my kids so it's helped. She's also in pretty good health, so unless something random comes up - I think she'll be around for a while.

[sandyapples]

H's Grandma is 94 and she has been like this for the ten years I've own her. Her husband died 30 years ago and she has lived in assisted living for the past 5. We try to change the subject when she bring it up

[BaliHai]

Hugs. My Grandmom had Alzheimer's, and in her lucid moments she'd cry and ask why her husband wasn't coming for her, because she was waiting and ready. It was completely devastating to hear, but not an uncommon feeling amongst the elderly, I guess. I'm sure it's that much harder knowing your Grandmom feels that way and is in good health.

[LaceyV]

H's uncle keeps saying this except he's not even 60 yet. He never married, has no kids, and is pissed that all the nephews are all settling down and having families and don't have time to drive the 2 hours to see him every weekend like they used to when they were younger so he says we are abandoning him. It's really depressing and also kind of annoying because my grandfather is very sick and cries because he wants to be around to watch my kids grow up and will be lucky to live the 2 more months till my son is born.

[cville]

That must be so hard to witness. I'm sorry Rak

[prettyinpink]

My grandmother died last month one month shy of 98. She did the same thing as yours for YEARS! We let her talk but reminded her that she didn't get to choose when she would go God would do that for her. Big hugs to you.