Drowsy but awake...how do you do it?

[gretchenwieners]

I feel pretty dumb asking this but how did/do you put your baby down drowsy but awake? If I do it, he goes from drowsy to AWAKE and if I'm super lucky he goes from awake to screaming overtired meltdown. I'm currently sitting here watching him look at everything but his eye lids. I know he's tired because hes got all his sleep cues going on but his eyes pop open everytime I put him down. He's swaddled and I've tried the shush-pat and the pick up put down from Babywise but neither work, it just ticks him off more. Does anyone have any tips?

[dulcemariamar]

That never worked for us. She would scream the second we tried putting her down.

[gretchenwieners]

Mar 9, 2015 16:45:30 GMT -5 @tambcat said:

What happens if you just wait until he's asleep?

He never falls asleep. Eventually just starts screaming. :-(

[turtlegirl]

I could never do this until they were about 4-5 months old with either of my kids. It must be in our kids genetics to require full assistance to fall asleep as newborns.

It was either hold/nurse/rock until they fell fully asleep or the swing would also put them to sleep.

[gretchenwieners]

Mar 9, 2015 16:57:39 GMT -5 turtlegirl said:

I could never do this until they were about 4-5 months old with either of my kids. It must be in our kids genetics to require full assistance to fall asleep as newborns.

It was either hold/nurse/rock until they fell fully asleep or the swing would also put them to sleep.

Ok now I don't feel so bad. He will only fall asleep if I hold him and pat his back/shush/rock or some variation or put him in the swing.

[mlt]

I couldn't ever do it with DS1. I nursed him to sleep until he was old enough for CIO. Which he did every night for years. Even now at 4 he cries at bedtime probably 4/7 nights.

DS2 has done down drowsy but awake since he came home from the hospital. As soon as he showed sleep cues we put him in his crib and he fell asleep. We were shocked. What was this magic?!?

Watching the sleep differences between my kids has convinced me that sleep issues are totally out of parental control. I think sleep is tied to personality and genetics.

[Deleted]

Mar 9, 2015 17:01:56 GMT -5 mlt said:

I couldn't ever do it with DS1. I nursed him to sleep until he was old enough for CIO. Which he did every night for years. Even now at 4 he cries at bedtime probably 4/7 nights.

DS2 has done down drowsy but awake since he came home from the hospital. As soon as he showed sleep cues we put him in his crib and he fell asleep. We were shocked. What was this magic?!?

Watching the sleep differences between my kids has convinced me that sleep issues are totally out of parental control. I think sleep is tied to personality and genetics.

I would agree.

DS1 never did drowsy but awake. He would instantly wake up and freak the f out. This was forever. The kid didn't STTN until 2.5 years.

DS2 was completely different. He just drifted off.

DS3 is somewhere in between. He's 3 months and not on a solid day time sleep pattern yet. Sometimes he'll be on the floor and just fall asleep out of the blue. Same with in the bouncer. I think this is a good sign at this age.

[demofea01]

I agree with everyone above. It just started working at around 4 months. We also started out with it at bedtime first and then moved to using it for naps around 5-5.5 months.

[sent]

It took DD until 10 months to figure out "drowsy but awake."

Prior to this she fell asleep with the bottle in her mouth. I was afraid it was going to be a habit we would have to break in the future, but luckily she did it on her own.

[gibbinator]

I can get ds2, 6mo, to suck on my finger for a minute to calm down if he starts getting worked up. He spends about 10 mins alternating between whining, sucking, grabbing my fingers, staring at the light on the monitor, kicking his feet on the mattress, repeat. It only works at night when the room is totally dark.

It never worked with ds1 until he was about a year old.

[lilles]

Ha, ha, ha. I have three kids and it didn't work for any of them. The youngest is seven months and I keep trying every couple of weeks and he just screams.

[timorousbeastie]

Drowsy but awake didn't work for DD at all until we CIO at 6 months. Before that, she needed to be solidly out cold (which could easily take an hour or more) before she could be put down.

[Velar Fricative]

Never worked until we did Ferber at 5.5 months. No idea what we were doing "wrong" before then.

[arebee]

This hasn't worked for us. We hold DD until she is in a deep sleep and then transfer her to her crib.

[hetty]

I nursed to sleep until it stopped working. Then she just kind of figured it out on her own. This has been in the last month and she just turned one. So basically, I'm no help.

[persa]

Mine are 12 weeks and are just now doing it. And another trick that we learned with DD was to turn them or face them in a way that they couldn't make eye contact with you. Once they get they're eyes locked on to yours, they fly open and it's like they're incapable of falling asleep. With the boys, I actually turn their rock n plays around to face the wall.

[thebreakfastclub]

I think mine did it from birth. The swaddle, pacifier and white noise helped. But he was always able to fall asleep alone.

[gretchenwieners]

Mar 9, 2015 17:05:07 GMT -5 @mrsbecky said:

Sorry, to clarify, my point is your child may not be there yet. I would wait another week or two and try again.

If he falls asleep and you put him down does he stay asleep?

He will be 4 months on Friday. We tried at 8 weeks and he definitely wasn't ready for it then. We are hitting the 4 month wakeful, I think, so I thought I'd try again. Probably bad timing to try this drowsy but awake thing.  I get emails from Lucie's List and got one on the 4 month sleep regression and how to cope, which is what brought this back up.   He used to sleep all night once he fell asleep with me rocking him. Now, he's up every 1.5 - 2 hours in the night and has always had only 3-4 40 minute naps during the day. Good times! LOL

I think I'll just do what I can to get through for the next few weeks and try again when he starts sleeping better. Thank you all for your replies, I thought I was the only one whose baby wasn't able to fall asleep on their own, makes me feel SO much better that I'm not alone!

[jeaniebueller]

With a 3 month old, I wouldn't even worry about drowsy but awake. KOKO. The 4-6 month period was a hard, hard time for sleep in my household. IMO, there is really no point in trying to introduce new things until you can get over that hump and into appropriate fuss it out/CIO age. Hang in there!

[GotWine]

I have the same issue with DS. As soon as I lay him down his eyes pop open and he is wide awake! I've been putting the paci in his mouth and stroking the side of his face and temple with my finger while shushing him and he will fall back to sleep while laying there. Some times take longer than others and if he starts getting too upset I pick him up and start over.

[jsillyfun]

My friend jokes that this is a mythical state akin to "awake but a unicorn."

[laurack]

I did it successfully when he was a few weeks old and I was smug about it. Got a good sleeper this time! we gloated. Then the four month wakeful hit and since then he's been a disaster. I just nurse him until he's out cold because if he's not he screams and screams. but I know that's probably why he keeps waking up all night.. sigh. He's 10 months now

[Deleted]

It's not something you do. It's something your baby does or doesn't do. Dd1 didn't do it, dd2 did. It had nothing to do with anything we did as parents.

[carolinagirl831]

We couldn't do it until dd was around one

[MadamePresident]

No idea. I usually nurse to sleep and then lay with them in bed an extra minute before leaving.