My H has a stepdaughter from his previous marriage. They've kept a relationship, and we've flown her out here, as well as seen her when we're back in Michigan. She's 20.
H gives her money a couple of times of year, from $500 to $1,000. I try to keep my mouth shut but it irritates the hell out of me that she never says thank you or acts like this is a gift.
H recently received a check from his deceased dad's house selling, and he's sending her $1,000. He sent her a text asking where he should send the money. Nothing. So he said, "Should I give it to a homeless person?" She finally responds, "Send it to my address, let me know when to look for it."
Sounds to me like he needs to cut off the funding until she appreciates what he provides, even if it's "fake" appreciation of the "fake it until you make it" variety. And send the $ to a homeless shelter or food bank instead. But she's like that because he lets her get away with it. Gotta love parental guilt.
Okay, I don't feel like so much of a jerk. I seriously try not to comment because it's not my money and not my relationship, but I don't know what I would have done at 20 to get a check for $1,000. Damn.
He did say today after her flippant response, "This is probably my last check." We'll see. TBH, I think he feels guilty for leaving her mom. Her life has been anything but stable since then