Ex BIL is a La-Hoo-Ser

[ooglie26]

My sister just called. Her ex (my nieces father) has been arrested...again.

Backstory: He won't hold a job, lies about everything, and relies on his dad's deep pockets and other women to provide him with his wants and needs. When they were married, he was a serial cheater. She thought she could change him, he got another woman pregnant who delivered 3 weeks after my sister had my niece. She finally wised up and left him, when he got arrested for possession when my niece was about 6 months old. They are now divorced, my niece is almost 9, and he's seen her maybe 4 times in the last 8 years.

His other baby-momma called my sister this afternoon, to let her know that he's been arrested, yet again. This time, for the intent to manufacture, package, and distribute/sell meth. He had a freakin' meth lab set up in the house that my sister and niece used to live in (his dad owns it).

I feel bad for my niece and her half-siblings (there are about 5 or 6, at last count), because they will want to know why he hasn't been around. I don't want any of them to ever feel they weren't good enough.

Sorry for the rambling...I needed to get this out.

[flamingeaux]

It sucks hard core when parents are habitual fuck ups. But on the plus side, it will be easier for the kids to see the problem is with him, and not with them, because he does keep doing stupid crap, with drugs and getting arrested.

I would imagine, that if he were behaving in a responsible manner, working a 9-5, staying out of trouble type of person, that just didn't care about them it would be a little harder to understand that it's his fault.

The best you can do, is just give your niece lots of love, and point out that her mom was too smart to put up with his baloney and she is too!

[ooglie26]

She asks about him from time to time. My sister re-married a year ago (my h's BF, no less, lol).

He's the best dad that girl could ask for.

[ooglie26]

Aug 12, 2012 19:39:20 GMT -5 Que? said:

He sounds like my brother. He hasn't seen my niece in 10 years. She used to ask about him but she adjusted pretty well considering she didn't really know what she was missing, as he was never there. She has had an amazing stepdad since she was 5 and still has a relationship with all of my family. Your niece will be fine, I just hope his other kids are as lucky as she is.

I know some of them aren't as lucky, and it breaks my heart. I wish I could take them all in.