Check in?

[malibu]

How's everyone doing?

I am pretty sure my H is still drinking, but it must be so little that either a) it hardly does anything or b) he isn't and I'm making up things in my head. I don't know what to think. Otherwise things are decent. I'm 1.4 pounds away from being at a 50-pound loss. 34.4 pounds till my high goal and 39.4 pounds until my ideal goal weight. Being active and taking care of myself has made me feel light years better about everything in my life. Since the weather here has started to finally improve, I've gotten my DD on her bike, on skates, and soon I plan to take her hiking around the state parks. I'm hoping to go to a camper cabin (really rustic type cabin, like having a tent without the setup) up near the Lake Superior area this summer.

[SwimDeep]

That sounds like a wonderful trip malibu! It's exactly the sort of camping trip I would love.
And congrats on the weight loss!!! Fantastic!

I think I'm doing alright. I'm starting to wean off some of the medication. I'm better at channeling my energy (positive or negative) into productive things like exercise, crocheting, and meditating...So I'm doing better, but there are some difficult things coming up that have me feeling apprehensive.

[phoenixrising]

I am doing okay. My sister is getting married tomorrow, so all my family-related stress has been at the forefront. I have been doing some good work with my therapist, I think, and I am starting to feel like I am making some progress in therapy (3.5 years into the process). I am seeing the psychiatrist on 6/8, and I am going to have change antidepressants because the Effexor I am on causes me to have whackadoo dreams, and I am not a fan of that side effect. I do like how well it controls my depression, however, so I am hoping that she has an idea of something I can take that will do the same thing without having the dream thing happen. I also am increasing this week to the top dose of Vyvanse, which I was put on for my binge eating disorder, and I am seeing some real impact from that. I have not yet reached the point where I am totally not bingeing, but the symptoms are definitely much better.

My big goal this week (I am on vacation from work until next Friday) is to get some control over the hot mess that is my apartment. I am sort of in a "hoarders junior" situation here, and I need to work on creating a less chaotic home environment. I am hoping once my entire family leaves town on Monday, I can spend a serious amount of time working on it. I am going to have to kind of trick myself into not engaging in numbing behaviors (TV and computer games, for the most part) instead because I could easily spend four days sitting on my ass, but that is not what I am hoping for.

[flex]

I'm doing fine. Staying busy as always. Got a good offer on my house from a family of six, which is a perfect fit since my house has five bedrooms and a huge laundry room. The home inspection will be coming up soon. I have to be out by July 9, so I'm in the process of looking for a nice rental. I'm hoping I can get a place effective July 1 or so, which will give me some stress-free time to move my stuff from one place to another.

I was going to take a trip to Atlanta for the AA International Convention, but I cancelled it because the timing was bad plus paying the cost of a hotel, etc. wouldn't be a good idea with everything going on, so I cancelled the trip with no regrets.

[lovelovelove]

I'm alright. We've been so busy, I think we're both close to burn out. We go away for a long weekend with my family in a couple weeks so that will be a much needed relief.

We had a super rough counseling session last week. I sobbed the entire time while he shut down. It started with me asking for an apology for how crappy things were during his drinking, moved on to him being angry that I didn't understand how the disease worked and insisting he had nothing to apologize for, and ended with me revising my request from apology to acknowledgement and thank you. He wouldn't give it and it just devolved from there. He is working with his sponsor on coming to terms with what I'm feeling and asking.

We'll see how it goes. We had a really positive session today, and the therapist said she thinks we're at a great turning point to fixing things and moving on to a happy marriage if we can get some of that stuff addressed satisfactorily. Today we both opened our eyes to different feelings each of us is having regarding this.

I had posted a couple of weeks ago about feelinglike I wasn't balancing things well. Turns out I was right and I had 2 friends really upset that I had not been checking in and acknowledging their tough times. I've made very deep apologies and they are both willing to give it another shot. We're going to start with one on one catch ups as soon as possible. I had a really rough time with it.

And an icing on the cake was learning while all this was happening that someone I'm very close with is moving across the country really soon. I'm truly heartbroken, I've never felt like this before. I'll see her this weekend and hopefully lots more before the move.

Just a rough few days last week, but beyond that things are going well. Busy with mostly good things at work, dd is thriving at school and in activities, and we've been getting out in the great weather a ton. I've made some positive changes to household related stuff and we're working on some serious money saving tactics, trying to dig out of the hole last year's shenanigans put us in. I'm feeling hopeful for the future, but taking it one day at a time.