If someone is having a destination wedding, do you think they should be more inclined to invite their guests with their SO or a plus one? I know some people don't like traveling alone.
I'm going to my friends wedding in Puerto Rico and am in the wedding. I decided to make a little vacation out of it so am going for the whole week. My boyfriend (of only 5 months now) wasn't invited. I'm fine with it, he's still coming to PR for the week and leaving the morning of the wedding so he can get some things done at home, while I'll fly back the next day. I don't mind. I know the bride is trying to save money and is almost at max capacity of the venue for the number of guests she invited.
This is my first destination wedding experience, so was wondering if people are less likely to invite their friends with guests?
There is something about a destination wedding - where, conceivably, the area isn't familiar to ANYONE - that I do feel more that guests should be invited to bring someone. Especially if it's out of the country. That's more where I'd feel better having someone to travel with.
SOs should be invited regardless of where the wedding is or how long the couple has been dating. If they consider themselves to be serious, so should the couple getting married. Trying to save money is no excuse for rudeness. They should be hosting their guests properly. If they can't afford to do that, they need to scale back until they can.
Destination weddings should always get a plus one.
Agreed. While some people are fine traveling alone, most people are unlikely to want to take a solitary vacation. A plus one, especially for people obliged to attend (like those in the wedding party) seems pretty compulsory.
A +1 is usually the acceptable thing. A lot of people don't invite everyone & their mom to a destination wedding like that. In my experience it has been bridal party, family & MAYBE 4-6 couples that were not family.
So, yeah your friend is wrong. 1 person isn't going to kill her venue capacity. If I'm going to be in your destination wedding in a warm, sandy climate you best be sure I'm making it my vacation.
I'd say that maybe she was hoping fewer guests would RSVP yes if invited alone, but since you're actually in the wedding I don't think that applies here, lol.
No I kind of inadvertently asked if he could come. I was just asking about how planning was going and if this other bridesmaid was bringing her boyfriend or something and she said no because there wasn't enough room but after the RSVPs come in at the end of this month she would know how many extra seats she'd have if people could bring guests that weren't married/engaged/long term relationship.
She did just text me last night that my boyfriend was invited to the rehearsal dinner and his name is included on the evite.
I get we've only been dating for 5 months so 1 year ago when she started planning and I was single she didn't take in to account me bringing someone.
Post by formerlyak on May 27, 2015 18:49:01 GMT -5
My dh was invited to a destination wedding which took place 6 months into us dating. This destination wedding required that he go on a week-long cruise as the wedding was to take place in one of the ports of call and there was no other way to get there. He was not invited with a plus one. He went because this guy is one of his best friends, but he was MISERABLE being stuck on a cruise ship alone for a week. All the other guests, except two childhood friends of the groom, were either married or engaged so there were 3 of them alone. DH hung out with them some, but they are big drinkers and he is not so there was only so much hanging out at the bar on the ship he could handle.
I think destination weddings should always include a plus one.
No I kind of inadvertently asked if he could come. I was just asking about how planning was going and if this other bridesmaid was bringing her boyfriend or something and she said no because there wasn't enough room but after the RSVPs come in at the end of this month she would know how many extra seats she'd have if people could bring guests that weren't married/engaged/long term relationship.
She did just text me last night that my boyfriend was invited to the rehearsal dinner and his name is included on the evite.
I get we've only been dating for 5 months so 1 year ago when she started planning and I was single she didn't take in to account me bringing someone.
Huh. He is invited to some wedding-related festivities but excluded from the actual wedding? I think that makes it even more rude.
Lol, yeah. She said "I don't want him to eat alone that day" I guess she felt bad that he wasn't invited to the wedding?
I think he could've been invited as a B list guest lol after all the RSVPs are in at the end of this month, but we went ahead and bought our flights so it doesn't matter at this point.
So hopefully this makes me look less rude to forget my friends girlfriend for my graduation dinner
When you plan a destination wedding, you should plan a +1 for everyone (most people will make a trip out of a destination wedding). If your venue can't accommodate the +1 rule, then you either invite less guests or you get married somewhere else.
Lol. He has gotten her free tickets to an event so she better like him!
Ok, this is even weirder.
She actually knows him?
EVEN THE MISO THINKS THIS IS RUDE.
Lol, yes. I mean they aren't BFFs or anything. But they've met I think 3 times and I told her that he was coming to PR with me. I mean I don't know if she knows technically how long we've been dating, but she knows he is my boyfriend.
I think it is rude not to invite a plus one, to any wedding. Probably especially a destination wedding.
But. Being in the wedding party, I can actually see it a bit more. It's super awkward when you bring a plus one to a wedding where they don't know people or aren't personally friends with people and you're busy doing wedding stuff all day. You barely see your date when you're IN a wedding. So i guess I can see if you need to eliminate someone, leaving out the person who is likely going to be kind of awkwardly floating around anyway.
Lol, yes. I mean they aren't BFFs or anything. But they've met I think 3 times and I told her that he was coming to PR with me. I mean I don't know if she knows technically how long we've been dating, but she knows he is my boyfriend.
This is some fucking bullshit then. Not only has she met him, but she has personally benefited from knowing him in the form of event tickets.
And she's B-listing? Nice. What's next, a honeyfund? Charging admission to her wedding? Making guests pay for their food and drinks at the reception?
No she's not B listing. I just made that up lol.
My point was that I think my boyfriend could probably come after she gets in all the RSVPS and sees how much space is left at the venue. But I didn't want to wait 2 weeks before the wedding to buy our flights.
This is just based on her saying that about another bridesmaid bringing a guest.
I think it is rude not to invite a plus one, to any wedding. Probably especially a destination wedding.
But. Being in the wedding party, I can actually see it a bit more. It's super awkward when you bring a plus one to a wedding where they don't know people or aren't personally friends with people and you're busy doing wedding stuff all day. You barely see your date when you're IN a wedding. So i guess I can see if you need to eliminate someone, leaving out the person who is likely going to be kind of awkwardly floating around anyway.
What? No! The people IN your wedding are hypothetically the people to whom you are the closest! You give them the BEST treatment, not the worst.
You screw over your annoying cousins and that lady from up the street who your mom insists on inviting so she doesn't talk shit to the neighbors. Duh.
I think it is rude not to invite a plus one, to any wedding. Probably especially a destination wedding.
But. Being in the wedding party, I can actually see it a bit more. It's super awkward when you bring a plus one to a wedding where they don't know people or aren't personally friends with people and you're busy doing wedding stuff all day. You barely see your date when you're IN a wedding. So i guess I can see if you need to eliminate someone, leaving out the person who is likely going to be kind of awkwardly floating around anyway.
What? No! The people IN your wedding are hypothetically the people to whom you are the closest! You give them the BEST treatment, not the worst.
You screw over your annoying cousins and that lady from up the street who your mom insists on inviting so she doesn't talk shit to the neighbors. Duh.
I also agree with this.
I know you are all wondering what my arbitrary standards are.