Walk me through hiring a nanny

[pooh8402]

Our daycares won't have a spot for us before I go back to work, so we need to hire a nanny temporarily. I don't know how temporary though, it could be one month, could be 5 months.

Here's our situation. Dh works M-F 8-5, although it's more like 7-5:30. He travels some. I work 3 12 hour shifts per week, and not the same 3 days each week. I would know about a month ahead of time which days I'd be working. I think it would be about 24-39 hours each week, so I'd hire for full time and pay by the hour, I think.

So now I have 4 weeks to pick some candidates, interview them, and hire one. There's probably some kind of contract, right? Taxes? We don't have a local nanny agency. My starting place is care.com, and there is a local university with a bunch of early childhood education majors.

I've favorited a few people on care.com. So where do I go from here?

[anna7602]

I'm confused by all the scheduling requirements. I also don't understand "I'll hire FT and pay by the hour." Most (if not all) FT nannies will focus on the weekly rate, not the hourly rate. It's not going to fly if you're like, "I'll pay x per hour and some weeks you'll work 24 hours and some weeks you'll work 39 hours." That's a really wide range, basically going from PT one week to FT another.

I might not be understanding correctly, though. Which makes me think it might be hard for a prospective candidate to understand.

[pooh8402]

My H works a normal schedule, bit goes to work early and gets home about 6p.

I'm a nurse who works day shift, 7a-7p. I only need care 2-3 days each week, depending on my schedule, which varies. I know about a month in advance which days I would need. I wish I worked set days (like MWF), but I don't. That's not how my unit scheduling works.

So I would want someone available every day, but in actuality, she would have days off. It would still be full time the weeks that I need her for 3 days, because she'd be working long days, minimum 11 hours, more likely 12.

And yes, I know it's a bit confusing. We were planning on paying for FT daycare and just not using it every day.

[SJ]

Sept 2, 2015 12:52:37 GMT -5 pooh8402 said:

So I would want someone available every day, but in actuality, she would have days off. It would still be full time the weeks that I need her for 3 days, because she'd be working long days, minimum 11 hours, more likely 12.

But are you going to pay her the FT rate? Or pay her hourly for the actual hours worked?

[halfpint]

We didn't do a contract, per se. In the offer, and in the job description, I committed to an hourly amount, and a set number of hours. If we ask her not to work, we still pay her. The only time we reduce pay is if she opts not to come in (requested day off, sick time, doctor appt, etc.) and if she is out of time off (we provide 2 days per six months worked).

In your case, I think I would say it's hourly, but you are guaranteed at least xx number of hours (30 perhaps?) paid. Some weeks you may require more hours, commit to having their schedule at least two weeks in advance (more if possible). They need to be able to have some consistency in income, and with a varying schedule, they probably won't be able to take a second job to supplement.

Care.com offers assistance with nanny taxes. I would let your candidates know that you will withhold taxes as they elect on their W-4. You can also get assistance on the IRS site and likely from your state's website.

Care.com also offers interview question suggestions.

We hired our first nanny from Care, and it was a pretty smooth process - they even have a background check service you can use. We found our second nanny through our babywearing chapter, and still had her create a profile on Care so that I could use their hiring process.

Figure out other fringe benefits - use of car? Meals/snacks provided? What will you expect them to do during nap times?

[pooh8402]

Sept 2, 2015 12:54:37 GMT -5 SJ said:

Sept 2, 2015 12:52:37 GMT -5 pooh8402 said:

So I would want someone available every day, but in actuality, she would have days off. It would still be full time the weeks that I need her for 3 days, because she'd be working long days, minimum 11 hours, more likely 12.

But are you going to pay her the FT rate? Or pay her hourly for the actual hours worked?

I don't know, whichever is better. That's why I need help!

[SJ]

Do you have any PT or drop-in centers in your area? Have you talked to other nurses about what they do with a similar schedule?

The changing schedules is really hard to work around. I have friends in a similar situation and the best option for them was a nanny share with a family who already had a FT nanny. So they split costs (in a rather complicated formula) but it works great and they don't have to pay for more than they need. The nanny is happy because she still has FT work.

[redheadk]

You may have better luck of you pay a weekly rate based on 30 hours with an hourly rate for hours worked over that.

If you need her less than 30 hours, you can always have her come just a few hours so you can run errands or something.

Sounds like a hard job for a college kid to fill but maybe you can find 2 friends that can split. Might be more trouble than it's worth but I had friends that did that in college.

[Deleted]

I don't have any advice on logistics, but if you have trouble finding someone willing to work those hours you might want to look into a home daycare with drop in rates. My DCP does this for a nurse with a varied schedule.

[awkwardpenguin]

I agree with anna7602, you are likely going to have to pay a full time weekly rate, whether you use two days or three.

I've nannied in the past and never had a contract, but it seems like a good idea. Care.com has a tool to set up payroll and taxes. Don't be surprised if most nannies are expecting an under the table arrangement, and expect to pay more to set it up legally.

[boiler717]

I think it's going to be hard to find someone with that variance in hours. I would probably hire for 36 hours a week but not set hours. For the weeks you only need coverage for 24 work out having her come for a few hours on your days off to give you a break or work a date night for you.

[pooh8402]

Sept 2, 2015 12:59:24 GMT -5 SJ said:

Do you have any PT or drop-in centers in your area? Have you talked to other nurses about what they do with a similar schedule?

No, not without a wait list and already being enrolled. Fwiw, I've been on these lists since first tri.

They send their kids to day care, in home care (checked a few of these, no one had a spot until DS was at least a year), or use family. I have no family in town.

[anna7602]

Sept 2, 2015 12:56:05 GMT -5 pooh8402 said:

Sept 2, 2015 12:54:37 GMT -5 SJ said:

But are you going to pay her the FT rate? Or pay her hourly for the actual hours worked?

I don't know, whichever is better. That's why I need help!

Yeah, this is going to be hard. I also have a schedule that varies wildly. What I basically do is hire someone for a set number of hours and days and if I have more work than that, I scramble to find other options to cover those days/hours. It doesn't always work out for me and I end up stressing-the-hell-out, but since I can work during naps and on weekends, it's different than your situation. 

It is really hard to find someone who has complete flexibility and when you do find them, given your situation, it seems you are going to have to guarantee a minimum weekly rate that is equivalent to a full-time range. What is your plan with daycare? Will daycare just keep your child later on the days that you have to work a later shift? I'm not really getting how your hours coverage plan is different with a nanny than with daycare. It seems like you would run into the same challenges with each, no? If your plan is to pay daycare M-F and just not send him on, say, Thursdays one month then not send him on Wednesdays another month, then I think I would make the same arrangement with a nanny- ie, pay her M-F and tell her at the beginning of the month which days you won't use her if you prefer to stay home with your child. I know it's a lot of extra $$$, but you're basically paying her to NOT take another job so that she is completely flexible and available for you when you actually need her. (Note that I do NOT pay for this flexibility and like I said, I often get screwed. But I don't have the type of job that I HAVE to leave the house during the day for.)

[awkwardpenguin]

Sept 2, 2015 13:00:06 GMT -5 @republicrat said:

I don't have any advice on logistics, but if you have trouble finding someone willing to work those hours you might want to look into a home daycare with drop in rates. My DCP does this for a nurse with a varied schedule.

This is a great idea.  Our DCP also is willing to do this arrangement.

[SJ]

I still think a nanny share might work well. So your kid would join the nanny share 2-3 days/week, etc.

[boiler717]

I'd probably word it something like
Hours: 36 hours per week
2, 12 hour days each week. The options for the remaining 12 hours per week may be scheduled as:
- 1, 12 hour work day
- split between remaining business days
- split between remaining business days
and/or evening or weekend date night
- option at nanny's description to take as unpaid with employer agreement
Schedule will be arranged 1 month prior. No more than 2 evening or weekends will be scheduled per month.

[pooh8402]

Sept 2, 2015 13:03:54 GMT -5 anna7602 said:

Sept 2, 2015 12:56:05 GMT -5 pooh8402 said:

I don't know, whichever is better. That's why I need help!

Yeah, this is going to be hard. I also have a schedule that varies wildly. What I basically do is hire someone for a set number of hours and days and if I have more work than that, I scramble to find other options to cover those days/hours. It doesn't always work out for me and I end up stressing-the-hell-out, but since I can work during naps and on weekends, it's different than your situation. 

It is really hard to find someone who has complete flexibility and when you do find them, given your situation, it seems you are going to have to guarantee a minimum weekly rate that is equivalent to a full-time range. What is your plan with daycare? Will daycare just keep your child later on the days that you have to work a later shift? I'm not really getting how your hours coverage plan is different with a nanny than with daycare. It seems like you would run into the same challenges with each, no? If your plan is to pay daycare M-F and just not send him on, say, Thursdays one month then not send him on Wednesdays another month, then I think I would make the same arrangement with a nanny- ie, pay her M-F and tell her at the beginning of the month which days you won't use her if you prefer to stay home with your child. I know it's a lot of extra $$$, but you're basically paying her to NOT take another job so that she is completely flexible and available for you when you actually need her. (Note that I do NOT pay for this flexibility and like I said, I often get screwed. But I don't have the type of job that I HAVE to leave the house during the day for.)

Why do I prefer daycare vs a nanny? Money. Daycare around here is $700-800 per month for full time infants. A nanny will be at least 1.5x that, especially since, like you said, we'd be paying her to not take a another job.

My H was going to do dropoff and pickup for daycare, and scramble to get there in time. The weeks that he travels is when I am going to be super stressed.

[anna7602]

Sept 2, 2015 13:08:49 GMT -5 pooh8402 said:

Sept 2, 2015 13:03:54 GMT -5 anna7602 said:

Yeah, this is going to be hard. I also have a schedule that varies wildly. What I basically do is hire someone for a set number of hours and days and if I have more work than that, I scramble to find other options to cover those days/hours. It doesn't always work out for me and I end up stressing-the-hell-out, but since I can work during naps and on weekends, it's different than your situation. 

It is really hard to find someone who has complete flexibility and when you do find them, given your situation, it seems you are going to have to guarantee a minimum weekly rate that is equivalent to a full-time range. What is your plan with daycare? Will daycare just keep your child later on the days that you have to work a later shift? I'm not really getting how your hours coverage plan is different with a nanny than with daycare. It seems like you would run into the same challenges with each, no? If your plan is to pay daycare M-F and just not send him on, say, Thursdays one month then not send him on Wednesdays another month, then I think I would make the same arrangement with a nanny- ie, pay her M-F and tell her at the beginning of the month which days you won't use her if you prefer to stay home with your child. I know it's a lot of extra $$$, but you're basically paying her to NOT take another job so that she is completely flexible and available for you when you actually need her. (Note that I do NOT pay for this flexibility and like I said, I often get screwed. But I don't have the type of job that I HAVE to leave the house during the day for.)

Why do I prefer daycare vs a nanny? Money. Daycare around here is $700-800 per month for full time infants. A nanny will be at least 1.5x that, especially since, like you said, we'd be paying her to not take a another job.

My H was going to do dropoff and pickup for daycare, and scramble to get there in time. The weeks that he travels is when I am going to be super stressed.

I never asked you why you prefer daycare to a nanny. I am trying to help. I asked what the arrangement was going to be with daycare, time-wise, and how the coverage plan is different with a nanny. 


I think I will back out of this post now since it seems that you want a magic solution that may not exist. 

ETA: I just bolded my questions. 

ETA: saw your response below. nevermind me. answered again below. 

[anna7602]

Sept 2, 2015 13:05:54 GMT -5 boiler717 said:

I'd probably word it something like
Hours: 36 hours per week
2, 12 hour days each week. The options for the remaining 12 hours per week may be scheduled as:
- 1, 12 hour work day
- split between remaining business days
- split between remaining business days
and/or evening or weekend date night
- option at nanny's description to take as unpaid with employer agreement
Schedule will be arranged 1 month prior. No more than 2 evening or weekends will be scheduled per month.

And she will get exactly 2 responses, if that. 

[pooh8402]

Sept 2, 2015 13:12:46 GMT -5 anna7602 said:

Sept 2, 2015 13:08:49 GMT -5 pooh8402 said:

Why do I prefer daycare vs a nanny? Money. Daycare around here is $700-800 per month for full time infants. A nanny will be at least 1.5x that, especially since, like you said, we'd be paying her to not take a another job.

My H was going to do dropoff and pickup for daycare, and scramble to get there in time. The weeks that he travels is when I am going to be super stressed.

I never asked you why you prefer daycare to a nanny. I am trying to help. I asked what the arrangement was going to be with daycare, time-wise, and how the coverage plan is different with a nanny. 


I think I will back out of this post now since it seems that you want a magic solution that may not exist. 

No I'm sorry. I didn't intend to be snotty. I'm frustrated with the overall situation. I thought you did ask that, though. I answered your question in my second paragraph.

Although my original question was about the actual process of hiring a nanny. I promise, I have looked at all the options in my area. They are limited, especially for healthcare workers.

ETA
" If your plan is to pay daycare M-F and just not send him on, say, Thursdays one month then not send him on Wednesdays another month, then I think I would make the same arrangement with a nanny- ie, pay her M-F and tell her at the beginning of the month which days you won't use her if you prefer to stay home with your child."

I wish it were this simple. My schedule looks like this:
Week 1: MTTh
Week 2: TWSa
Week 3: SuThF
Week 4: TThF

Or something like that. Completely different week to week, month to month. And in my above example, weeks 2 and 3 include a weekend shift, so I would only need care 2 days that week.

[anna7602]

Okay, for the weeks your H travels, I think I would just hire someone else entirely and leave the daycare/nanny arrangements as a set number of days/hours per week. After hours are definitely in the realm of occasional evening babysitting v. FT day jobs, unless your H is traveling weekly.

[boiler717]

Sept 2, 2015 13:14:07 GMT -5 anna7602 said:

Sept 2, 2015 13:05:54 GMT -5 boiler717 said:

I'd probably word it something like
Hours: 36 hours per week
2, 12 hour days each week. The options for the remaining 12 hours per week may be scheduled as:
- 1, 12 hour work day
- split between remaining business days
- split between remaining business days
and/or evening or weekend date night
- option at nanny's description to take as unpaid with employer agreement
Schedule will be arranged 1 month prior. No more than 2 evening or weekends will be scheduled per month.

And she will get exactly 2 responses, if that. 

I don't know, I have friends who have this schedule with their nanny (two pharmacists so similar hours challenge logistically). They pay 40 hours a week and she either works 3 longer days, 5 shorter days, and does a date night for them every Thursday evening. Sometimes they just pay her without having her work. The nanny gets FT pay, the schedule just isn't set hours. They've hired twice (fired their first) and had many applicants both times.

[awkwardpenguin]

Sept 2, 2015 13:05:54 GMT -5 boiler717 said:

I'd probably word it something like
Hours: 36 hours per week
2, 12 hour days each week. The options for the remaining 12 hours per week may be scheduled as:
- 1, 12 hour work day
- split between remaining business days
- split between remaining business days
and/or evening or weekend date night
- option at nanny's description to take as unpaid with employer agreement
Schedule will be arranged 1 month prior. No more than 2 evening or weekends will be scheduled per month.

I don't think the irregular schedule will be that hard to work around, but this way of wording it makes everything more complicated than it needs to be and I would assume the person was high maintenance and not respond.  I also don't think it's particularly reasonable to expect the nanny to rotate hours from days to evenings.

I'd hire the person for three twelve hour shifts, rotating days.  On the weeks you only work two weekdays have the nanny come a half day or even a full day and run errands/clean the house/whatever.  Hire a separate occasional person for evening/weekend coverage when your husband travels.

[pooh8402]

so in short, I will probably need to advertise "guaranteed 32 (or 36) hours paid per week, rotating days." of course, it would be worded a bit better. and probably coming in for a few hours one or two days a week for me to run errands? I was planning to use daycare for that as well.

I would want them to have their own transportation (and every nanny profile I've looked at does). maybe some very light housework (sweeping, wiping down the kitchen counter if used)? we also have 2 dogs so obvs, I'd need someone comfortable with animals. preferably first aid/CPR certified but not required.

someone mentioned upthread about nannies willing to be paid under the table, and that you have to pay more to have everything legal? do people do this a lot? the profiles I've looked at all say "willing to have taxes withheld." what does that mean?

[jeaniebueller]

Do you have any friends who SAH who may be willing to watch him for some extra money?

[pooh8402]

Sept 2, 2015 13:50:21 GMT -5 jeaniebueller said:

Do you have any friends who SAH who may be willing to watch him for some extra money?

I wish! no


honestly, all of this is making me want to just SAH and work PRN on weekends so I didn't have to deal with it at all. but we need the money. 

[kermit]

If I were you I'd continue to look on care.com but I'd also place an ad there. I did that when I was looking for someone to do occasional backup care and a few people responded within a day. That way you could explain the situation better. Maybe that's what you were planning on doing already.

[awkwardpenguin]

Sept 2, 2015 13:49:11 GMT -5 pooh8402 said:

so in short, I will probably need to advertise "guaranteed 32 (or 36) hours paid per week, rotating days." of course, it would be worded a bit better. and probably coming in for a few hours one or two days a week for me to run errands? I was planning to use daycare for that as well.

I would want them to have their own transportation (and every nanny profile I've looked at does). maybe some very light housework (sweeping, wiping down the kitchen counter if used)? we also have 2 dogs so obvs, I'd need someone comfortable with animals. preferably first aid/CPR certified but not required.

someone mentioned upthread about nannies willing to be paid under the table, and that you have to pay more to have everything legal? do people do this a lot? the profiles I've looked at all say "willing to have taxes withheld." what does that mean?

That means they're willing to arrange things legally, which is preferred by most people on the board.  Care.com has a great section on taxes and how to set it up.

As far as housework, definitely take advantage of having a nanny for kid-related chores.  She can do baby's laundry, prep and wash bottles, etc.  I'd keep additional housework very light, but sweeping and wiping down counters sounds reasonable.

[barefootcontessa]

My thought is SJ's option would be the best overall. A temporary job with variable hours does not seem likely to yield a great candidate pool. Maybe try another post asking about finding a nanny share. Also, the SAHP idea is good -- I would work my network hard to see if you can find someone. Although I would never keep another child long-term, I would seriously consider a short-term arrangement such as yours.

[krystee]

To save money and to make it less complicated, I would investigate in-home centers that may have temporary openings or other families who have a nanny that you could share on those two or three days.