Supervised visits vent

[achase123]

So just under 3 weeks ago the court ordered Xh to have supervised visits. This was for a short amount of time (2 months) and they must take place at a visitation facility with a professional. There are two main facilities that do this here. We were given the information for both. I called both places to give them my information, as did my attorney. They said we've done our part now we have to wait to see what Xh does.

Well that was three weeks ago. I haven't heard a word from anyone until last night. I got a call after 5pm from one of the supervisors. They said Xh wanted to schedule a visit for this weekend. I said we've got a very dull weekend with family in town. P has a bday party today and his rodeo tomorrow. She acted shocked that it was a tight schedule. Then she inquired about next weekend. We have to be out of town. She said "oh well supervised visits should take precedence over everything". I told her we have availability all week and Xh has a very flexible schedule so let's do one on Sunday after the rodeo and maybe one on Monday. I told her I haven't heard a word about anything for three weeks so what was I to do but plan our lives.

She finally called Xh back and scheduled two visits for two weeks out. Two weeks from this weekend. Apparently he wasn't happy we're gone next weekend.

I'm kind of baffled. He could fully do a visit this weekend and this week or even the following week. The ONLY time we can't do it at all is next weekend and he's upset with me? Not to mention the fact that he'll only have ONE visit before we return to court. I talked to my attorney and he said none of this is our problem.

It's just stressful when I'm trying to do everything the correct way and I know you cannot depend on a druggies schedule for anything and yet the supervisor acted as if I was being difficult. When I heard nothing for three weeks after court what was I to do?

Plus I am appalled that Xh hasn't seen P since February and yet he waits FIVE weeks after our court case to actually schedule a visit. I cannot fathom not seeing your child for six months and then you get the green light and wait five more weeks? The whole thing seems crazy to me.

[doriswe]

Ehhh, I wouldn't be shocked by XH's asinine behavior, this seems to be par for the course with him. And I wouldn't worry about the visitation worker's attitude. You are being accommodating. You did not tell her to go screw off or anything, you simply explained you already had things planned and gave her alternatives. Don't let her get to you (or him for that matter).

ETA: I mean to say, you're doing the right thing, don't let them question that.  

[1confused1]

I still swear we were married to the same man. I'm sorry you're dealing with this.

I'm surprised the court didn't order specific days for his visitation to occur (i.e. every other weekend, etc).

Can you get the order amended so he has to notify you by x day that he will be having his visitation?

My order states xh has to notify me by Wednesday if he is going to exercise his time.

[achase123]

Yes those are all good points. I think it should be at least 48 hours of notification. I'll def bring this up with my attorney.

Thanks for the reassurance ladies. It does always seem like the party who is most worried is usually doing the right thing.

[1confused1]

Sept 12, 2015 11:34:57 GMT -5 achase123 said:

Yes those are all good points. I think it should be at least 48 hours of notification. I'll def bring this up with my attorney.

Thanks for the reassurance ladies. It does always seem like the party who is most worried is usually doing the right thing.

I so agree with your last sentence. Xh is currently threatening to call the police on me. He's the one not following the order.

[sherbanator]

Ugh, I'm sorry you and P are going through that.

[achase123]

Sept 12, 2015 11:50:18 GMT -5 1confused1 said:

Sept 12, 2015 11:34:57 GMT -5 achase123 said:

Yes those are all good points. I think it should be at least 48 hours of notification. I'll def bring this up with my attorney.

Thanks for the reassurance ladies. It does always seem like the party who is most worried is usually doing the right thing.

I so agree with your last sentence. Xh is currently threatening to call the police on me. He's the one not following the order.

I'm finally beginning to realize that his threats mean nothing after almost 6 1/2 years of dealing with this. I ignore what he says 100% of the time. THe supervisor kind of threw me for a loop though

[pinkdutchtulips]

*hugs* i'm sorry you're dealing w/ this

i've got a request for no visitation w/ dd's dad (i'm asking the judge to make permanent the custody order in the RO) in my default judgment but in the off chance the court, grants supervised visitation (why w/ a DVRO and a Criminal Protective Order that covers dd too would they allow that ?!? i don't know but the courts have a mind of their own grrr)i also asked that xh be drug tested 2 hrs in advance and any failure nullifies the visit.

you're doing everything right ...