Online dating. Should I?

[Serenity9]

I'm sitting here thinking of making an online dating profile. For those of you who do online dating, has it been mostly negative or positive? The thing I dread the most is seeing a guy I know on there. I have a lot of single guy friends, and I want to remain just friends. I feel like it would make things awkward. I browsed some guys on POF, and there were a couple of guys who seemed respectable.

I guess what has me thinking about it is that I met someone last weekend, he flirted and asked for my number, and he hasn't texted at all. Not even a "nice to meet you." Ugh.

[cuddlyevil]

It's been a mixed bag for me. It does depend on the website and your area we well.

[Deleted]

Go for it! It's just a different way to meet guys you'd never have met otherwise. Will you encounter assholes? Yes! Weed through them. I will say that it's a total crapshoot. Luck and timing, maybe. I didn't go on tons of dates, but I did meet J on POF and he just may be the guy I spend my life with.    

[Deleted]

I wouldn't worry about seeing someone you know. I've only come across one guy I knew who I had actually dated and I just didn't reach out obviously. And so what if they see you are on a dating site? So are they!

I will say you will have negative and positive experiences. I have to take breaks from it because I don't have the thickest skin and I'm not very patient. But I always end up going back. Try it out and see how it goes! I always say once you feel like it isn't fun anymore give yourself a break.

[calle28]

You should go for it! I've had mostly positive experiences. In the past I've used Match, POF, OKCupid and most recently, eHarmony. Match sucked for me and I got the most dates from OKCupid. Like cuddly said, it really does depend on your area.

I met the guy I'm currently dating on eHarmony.

Just have fun and don't take it too seriously!

[spedrunner]

i hate online dating. I have a hard time connecting with people so online is even harder. I have met a few guys that turned out to be the complete opposite of what I expected and they portrayed. I have a hard time with attraction. I personally need to feel connected and attracted to someone in person. Its too weird for me and feels forced online dating! HOWEVER i know many people that have had great luck (and love) , so it depends on you and your needs

[Serenity9]

So I joined a couple. I joined one called Coffee meets Bagel. I heard of it a long time ago, and I like the concept.

I also joined POF, and holy overload! I keep getting these generic notifications that so-and-so wants to meet me, but when I click them, it says I have to upgrade my account. I've had a few direct messages. Most just "hi."

If you see someone you like on POF, what to you do? Message? On the desktop there was an "express interest" button. Do you use that?

[cuddlyevil]

I will message them.

[glitzyglow]

Coffee Meets Bagel was a dud for me. I wouldn't have matches for weeks. Tinder is probably the best app in my area for dating. OKCupid was a hot mess...most of my most horrific first messages came from that website. I like apps where they can't contact me unless we've mutually swiped/liked one another.

I think the biggest question to ask oneself before jumping into online dating is how sensitive you are to rejection? People can possibly say mean things (unwarranted most of the time), ghost others, lie, etc. If that type of behavior won't crush your soul, you're good.

[Wanderista]

I think that if you are curious about it then you should try it. I do think it gives you the ability to be open to meeting someone or to keep your toe in when you are not looking too hard. The good thing is that there are different ways to do it.

Online dating always suited me for some reason because I'm not good at chatting up total strangers or flirting in a bar. I know of people who are great at it but I freeze up. With online dating, I always liked getting to screen the guy before I decided if I wanted to know him further. Also, in the area where I live, online dating is kind of a preferred way to date because most people aren't single and so generally it's not safe to assume that someone is single. I remember once feeling like I was flirting with a guy in an office around here when I was younger only to find out that he was engaged - very embarrassing. After that I decided not to try to randomly bump into a potential date, I liked that in online dating I could focus on guys who put themselves out there as single and looking.

[cuddlyevil]

I do better in person than online, which is why I am working on expanding my in person network rather than do stuff online.

[Queen Mamadala]

I explored the online dating scene toward the end of my first marriage. I used it on and off for about two and a half years. PoF was the first I tried, and it was later recommended I try OKC. I briefly used match on a few separate occasions, but didn't really care for it. I didn't think the cost was worth it since most of the active members were also on the other sites. I met a few from there. OKC was my favorite by far. I went on a lot of dates from all of the sites, and although PoF is not the greatest, I did meet some interesting and nice people. Lots of first/only dates from PoF. Only a couple that I briefly dated.

I had a pretty good experience on OKC. There are certainly plenty of duds, but I had a lot of really high matches. I met my husband and two previous serious SOs on there, and a few others I briefly dated.

OLD worked great for me as an introvert who clicks best with fellow introverts.

[brooke77]

I tried Tinder for a second. Its not for me, but it may be for you. I say give online dating a try.

[somersault72]

I felt like I had to, unless I wanted to be single forever. I would have had no idea where else to meet someone. It wasn't my favorite, but that wasn't because of the online aspect, as much as I just really didn't really want to have to do the whole dating thing, lol. I met my boyfriend on match.

[glynn]

I meet and married H from Match 10 years ago. I set-up a profile but did not pay and a couple of weeks ago you could us it for free with a photo so I did that. I have been talking to a gut ever since that we seem to real click. I am waiting for my divorce to be final to meet hopeful this week. If we get all the agreements done Wednesday I may go ahead a meet him.
I tend to be shy and like to prescreen people because I do not want to hurt anyone's feelings.

[frontbutt]

So I'm doing Tinder right now. I like it because I have ultimate control over who gets to message me. So far I've only swiped like three guys right :/ But one guy immediately struck up a conversation and it's been very nice so far.

Sadly, I'm just really not into any of these dudes. I think it might be too soon.