Ugh. Life sucks. I'm out.

[Mushe]

I don't even know how to write this all, so here's some word vomit.  I've been so worried, and today I only measured between 8-9w (10w1d), and no HB.  My uterus was super tilted, so each measurement was a little different.  I'm going to stop progesterone and see what happens naturally.  I took a specimen container, in case I'm able to capture the sac for testing, at my request. 

I don't even know what to say.  I was prepared for this, but MH was really shocked.  Prepared doesn't mean okay, of course, but as soon as she turned on the sound, I knew.  I just don't even know what to say.  I'm not sure if I'll even try again.  This is too much heartbreak, and we're old.  Ugh ugh ugh. 

Thank you all so much for your support.  I'm coming up against another really busy two weeks at work, and I think I'll just try to stay away for a while, to heal emotionally. 

[dellabear]

OH Mushe I'm so, so sorry. A million hugs to you.

[ursulabuffay]

Oh man. I'm so sorry. I hate that you have To go through this.

[justwaiting]

I am so sorry. Huge hugs.

[satsuma]

I'm really sorry. My heart aches for you.

[callmehales]

Ugh I'm so so sorry.

[ivy]

Oh Mushe, no. I'm aching for you. I'm so, so sorry. Keeping you in my thoughts.

[boiler717]

I am so sorry for your loss. I will be thinking of you and your husband.

[cactuscookie]

What?! No! I'm so sorry. So, so sorry.

[dollyllama]

Oh Mushe, I am so sorry. This is not fair at all. So many hugs to you and DH.

[shanwalk]

I'm so so so sorry.

[mae141]

I'm so sorry. It's not fair.

[babyrn]

Oh no Mushe! I am so sorry. Fuck this. It is so unfair

[loira]

No! Oh Mushe, I'm so sorry. It's not fair.

[King26]

I am so, so sorry (((Mushe))

[trace]

Oh god. Mushe. I'm so so sorry. I'm tearing up for you. You've been everyone's biggest cheerleader, through the good and bad. I wish I could say or do something to ease your pain even a little but I know nothing really can right now. Sending you and your family all the love. Take all the time you need. <3

[shoeless]

I'm so very sorry ((hugs))

[ssg73]

I am so sorry. This is so unfair. Sending you peace and love.

[lms]

No, no, no! I'm so, so sorry. It's so not fair! So many hugs to you and your H.

[kellikans]

I'm so sorry Mushe

[belovedbride07]

I'm so sorry! IF is so unfair. ::hugs::

[awick14]

Fuck, I'm so sorry. If your every need to talk or anything please let me know. ((Hugs))

[bcarp30]

Nooooo I'm so very sorry. So many hugs and thoughts to you and your DH Mushe. I wish there was something else I could do or say.

[ginkgoleaf]

Oh mushe, I am so very sorry. Man that totally sucks, life is so unfair sometimes.

[ouokie]

Oh no! I'm so sorry for your loss! I am so heart broken! You will be in my prayers and thoughts.

[G22]

Oh mushe, I'm so sorry! How truly unfair and awful. Huge hugs. You'll be in my thoughts and prayers.

[Bumblebee]

I am so very sorry, mushe.  Take good care of yourself.

[Muddled]

Lots of love to you, mushe. I'm so very sorry.

[KB]

Oh Mushe, I'm so sorry. Sending you so many hugs today.

[riffraff]

so much love to you Mushe. I'm so very sorry