s/o Baby Etiquette

[ellipsis]

What's the proper way to ask if it's okay if I bring my kid to your holiday party?

I feel like if I say "is it OK to bring DD?" they'll say yes. I am thinking of RSVPing "maybe" and say we are looking for a babysitter. How do you approach this?

[lattelady5]

"Is your party kid friendly or would it be better for me to get a sitter?"

[origami]

I would ask if it's adults only. If you say you're looking for a sitter they might assume you prefer to get a sitter. I would because I always prefer to get a sitter lol.

[lala]

I generally go by who the invitation is addressed to. If it's not clear, I've used the "we'd love to come, in lining up a babysitter."

[thejen626]

I say "this sounds so fun! Will there be other kids there, or should I get a sitter?"

To me when someone says "can I bring my kid" it's harder for me to say "no, we don't want kids at our 9pm party".

[thejen626]

Dec 13, 2015 19:39:38 GMT -5 @cse1960 said:

if your child's name is not on the invitation, he/she is not invited. And, an evening party would imply to me that no kids are wanted, in any event.

Let's be real, aren't most holiday parties either an evite or a Facebook event lately? I can't think of the last time I got a paper invitation to a holiday party, or really, any social gathering beside a wedding or shower.

[thejen626]

Dec 13, 2015 19:44:10 GMT -5 @cse1960 said:

Dec 13, 2015 19:40:56 GMT -5 thejen626 said:

Let's be real, aren't most holiday parties either an evite or a Facebook event lately? I can't think of the last time I got a paper invitation to a holiday party, or really, any social gathering beside a wedding or shower.

i don't know. I get paper invitations to everything. 

But really, would not an evite specify? And a Facebook notice of a party would doubtless give clues as to the tone of the event. 

I'm jealous of your paper invites!!

If *I* am hosting something and sending an evite, I specify by writing "adults only, please" or "husbands and children are welcome" or whatever. But in my experience, most people don't.

[h]

Unless the invitation is addressed to all of us, the invitation specifically says that kids are welcome, or it is obvious from the time and type of party that it is a kid friendly event (i.e., "please join us for a family cookie exchange from 2-4pm"), I assume children are not invited and get a sitter. I feel like you can almost always tell.

[imojoebunny]

I do not consider a 4 month old to be a child. I sometimes have parties where I banish kids, but a 4 month old would be fine with me. No censoring speech or behavior. No ruining of my walls with face paint. mostly, just sleeps, eats, and looks cute. I would straight up ask, since infants are special circumstances IMO.

[thebreakfastclub]

My former CW had a get together that she specified as a "very casual event" via evite that started at 5pm.

I brought my 2.5yo DS, we stayed for a couple of hours. She seemed happy he was there.

He was very well behaved. I was nervous because they are millionaires and her home is incredible. I wouldn't have done it without the "very casual" specified.

[anna7602]

Dec 13, 2015 19:39:38 GMT -5 @cse1960 said:

if your child's name is not on the invitation, he/she is not invited. And, an evening party would imply to me that no kids are wanted, in any event.

100% of the holiday parties I've been invited to this year have been via email. They come to my email address, but do not specify the names of anyone in my household.

I did leave my kids home for a 4pm party this weekend, though. And proceeded to make a whole weekend out of town out of it, so I generally endorse the "get a sitter anyway" sentiment expressed in this thread.

[Jalapeñomel]

I would assume my child is not invited unless specified.