Something traumatic

[Deleted]

So when I was little.
My grandpa who I saw everyday was I guess really sick. One day my mom and I came over for his daily visit. He didn't answer and we found him dead in the bathroom. He was trying to take his pills. I can never forget that moment and won't ever remember the after. But this has fucked me for life. It was just something never mentioned,. I'd go on to lose two other grandparents in three months. This memory didn't surface until I was 25 or so. Anyhow. Don't expect much. Just undwrstanding of surprressed memories

[Deleted]

And to be clear this was around Xmas. I'm. It being. Weird about bringing it uo

[sweetchix]

I'm sorry you had to witness that.

It is strange how the mind suppresses things to protect us. My sister and I had some inappropriate things done to us by a male babysitter when we were little. While I have always had the memory of my experience, she had suppressed hers and it didn't come back to her until she was in high school.

[pandora]

I am so sorry, pdx. Sending you a big hug. Holidays are usually hard enough for so many of us but that's a lot to have resurface.

Sweetchix, I'm so mad for you and your sis. I want to protect you both and kick him in the nads. Hugs!

[Deleted]

I'm sorry.  The brain has ways of suppressing these things sometimes.  And other times they just pop into our head out of nowhere or because something (that you don't even realize) triggers the memory.  It was obviously a difficult time losing so many people close together, @pdx18. 
I have vivid memories of my mom telling me that my dad had passed---i even remember what she was wearing---I was 5.  

Also, since my stepdad passed 2 years ago, (six months after my grandmother passed) I have random things pop into my head about him that just bring me to tears.  During my drive to work this morning, I remembered how when my stepdad asked my mom to marry him, he also gave me a tiny little diamond ring and asked me if it was ok if he married my mom.  I haven't thought about it in so long that it really just made me cry..hard.  

The brain and our thoughts and memories is a very complicated thing.  You're not alone.  Shit sucks sometimes and I find that the holidays just bring it all out.  

[Deleted]

((sweetchix))

[winecat]

Big hugs to you and sweetchix.