Our mental health care still sucks.

[meltoine]

PDQ, I will delete details. 

H has been having a really hard time lately. He's used MOS to see a therapist, but there are only two MOS therapists here and we've seen them both and don't like either. But he stuck it out with one of them for eight sessions because he was desperate. 

Wednesday of this week he saw his PCM and asked for a referral to a therapist and a psychiatrist. They sent him to in-house mental health, who gave him a questionnaire and determined that he is "moderately to severely depressed". They told him to see a MFLC because they don't want to give him an outside referral unless absolutely necessary since he's a flyer. 

So he saw the MFLC, and the guy himself said that H's symptoms are more than he's equipped to address, so H went back to mental health and again asked for a referral to an outside therapist and psychiatrist. They flat out said no, because he's a flyer. 

WHAT THE FUCK DO WE DO NOW?

I'm supposed to just stand by and watch my "severely depressed" H get worse, and no one will help him? This is ruining. His quality of life and strangling our marriage and they think that his flight status is more important, even though he hasn't flown in 4 months anyway. No wonder the military and veteran suicide rate is as high as it is. 

[mrsn052408]

I don't go here but your post title caught my attention. I'm a nurse and mental health services, or lack thereof, is one of my interests. I'm angry for you and your husband. I wish I had advice.

[dcn]

I'm so sorry, that is total bs. Can he file a complaint with the patient advocate? People go to them with ridiculous things everyday (DH was a patient advocate on and off at our last post), but they are there to help facilitate when something like this happens. If nothing comes of that, I would consider finding a therapist on your own and paying oop.

[panicked]

He needs to talk with patient advocacy. They cannot refuse to refer to mental health services for legit issues. Also, file an ice comment about that physician.

[kpol]

Hugs, mel. I don't have any advice, but I hope there is some resolution to all of this. You all deserve better.

[dcn]

Why couldn't they see him/treat him in mental health? Why does he need a referral out? Is the only doc there the mflc?

[G22]

That's awful! I'm sorry he's being given the run around. I hope he can get someone to help him. That's not fair to him or you that he has to just deal.

[Aquatica]

I'm sorry your H is going through this, it's such bs.

Not sure what branch you're in but maybe he could see/talk to someone through militaryonesource or the ACS (ACS is confidential so he does not need to give any info) until he can get referred out.

[tiramisu]

I don't go here at all, accidentally clicked on the board, but wanted to share this. I don't know if this organization might be helpful:
www.giveanhour.org/

I know nothing about them except that they ask providers to volunteer to give one hour of therapy weekly for a year at no cost.

[Aquatica]

Feb 21, 2016 18:03:25 GMT -5 Stan said:

l
When MH was on flight status he was terrified of getting referred out so he would just do nothing.

That's sad that SMs are unable to get the help they need. A few NCOs in H's company refuse to go to Mental Health because they don't want to be forced into separation.

[bina]

I'm sorry meltoine, I know they hate to endanger flight status, but he should be able to get the help he needs. I wish I had some advice but i'm really sorry you guys are dealing with that. Its a screwed up system.

[VillainV]

I'm so sorry. He needs to insist that they refer him. Can he involve his squadron flight doc? His squadron commander? Not sure he wants to do either of those things, but it might help if he feels comfortable with it.

[NomadicMama]

So the system is such that your DH, a flyer, is being left untreated by qualified providers because they don't want to jeopardize his flight status? WTF? I'd much rather have a pilot receive proper treatment than one who isn't allowed proper care.

I struggle with ADHD and depression. We pay out of pocket for my psychiatrist because he's awesome but does not take/process insurance. But, I see him now four times a year. A therapist is different.

With all of the technology available, there has to be something like FaceTime appointments.

My personal experience with military mental health care is mixed. I wish that high quality mental health care weren't such a freaking unicorn. One should not have to fight this hard for care.

[Deleted]

meltoine, any update? This is the suck for sure. What would the consequences for seeing someone outside and paying OOP while they handle the situation?

[amaristella]

Sorry. I agree talk to patient advocacy. Other than that I don't really have any ideas.

[VillainV]

meltoine, I know a pilot who had moderate depression and was taken off flying status for several months (perhaps up to a year? It was before I knew him) in order to get it treated. It did take him a little while to be returned to flying status after. I guess what I'm saying is that it DEFINITELY is possible. These agencies are there to HELP and it really makes me mad that they are brushing your H off on this. Yes, they should make sure members understand they may be removed from flying status temporarily, but that should never prevent flyers from getting the mental health care they need.

I'm so sorry you're going through this.