In your opinion...

[glw]

In your opinion, is hosting a cookout at your house for 40 guests "a lot of work"?

[OrangePixyStix]

Yes, if it is only me that is doing all the food shopping, prepping, cleaning up (before and after the party), and cooking. But if I have helpers or co-hosts, then it may not seem like so much work. My H can be helpful, but he has to be given a list of duties rather than just knowing how to help automatically sometimes.

We generally have 15-25 people over if we have a cookout type party and that seems like quite a bit of work on me, to be honest, since it takes me over a week to get my shit together for something like that. Then again, I'm lazy, so if my house was always spotless like some other people it may reduce the amount of work.... but I'm a tad clutter-prone and not regular on micro-cleaning (like baseboards, dusting fan blades, etc) until I know people are coming over. lol

[MyName]

Yes. Anything involving food/entertaining is a lot of work for me, but I do it because I love it (and because I'm a little crazy).

I guess it doesn't necessarily have to be if you're doing hamburgers and hot dogs and your yard is already set up for entertaining. But even then - you need extra chairs/tables, probably want a canopy for shade or in case of rain, it's still a ton of shopping, someone has to be at the grill and still keep everything else (chips, salads, drinks) full.

I'm planning to do a big cookout for my dad's 60th birthday this summer, and I'm anticipating a TON of work.

[glw]

THANK YOU. I needed validation.

Apparently G thinks having a cookout for 40 people from 3pm-midnight, including making/serving all the food and showing an outdoor movie (we own neither a projector nor a screen) is NBD and "not a lot of work" and I am crazy for thinking that it is. AND his plan was that we fly to NOLA on 4/27, go to JazzFest, fly home on 5/2, work 5/3, 4, 5, take off the 6th for our anniversary surprise**, and then throw this party on the 7th. And given that he works 18 hour days on the regular and would be catching up from our vacation there's NO way he would be home in the evenings of the 3rd, 4th or 5th. Plus, when he started naming people he wanted to invite in included a bunch of out-of-town friends who would then need to spend the night at our house. THIS IS INSANE.

Actually, I can understand where he is coming from. Because for HIM, this would be no big deal. Because I would be doing all of the prep that week and he fire up our grill (plus at least one other grill which I had borrowed and transported from glob knows where...) on the afternoon of the 7th  and have fun with our friends while I run around like a crazy person making sure there's enough napkins and everyone's glass is full.

I did not know this was the plan until last night. I knew he wanted to do a cookout that day, which I'm fine with, because our families will be in town (** again) and I figured we'd need to feed them anyway. I was picturing 10-15 people and like noon-3pm. I tried to explain that, but he got all snippy and said "if you don't want to do it, just say you don't want to do it"...so I said I didn't want to do it and he said "FINE"  like a teenager and I have no idea why downsizing the party is not an option to him. He said that there would be a ton of people who would want to celebrate this occasion with us so we couldn't invite some people and not others. Which...I have never in my life attended an anniversary party. Who cares about other people's anniversaries? I mean, maybe a 'like' on FB, if I can be bothered, right?

/vent

(Sorry that got super long.) 


**This is actually very sweet...G is horrible with planning anything and especially surprises, so I'm very thankful.  Because, as I've mentioned, he is terrible with surprises, I know exactly what it is that we are doing. But he doesn't know that I know. Anyway, it involves being out of town from mid-day and most likely overnight to the morning of the 7th, the day he thought we could do this cookout. 

[glw]

Apr 7, 2016 10:49:28 GMT -5 @stellarsailor said:

Yes! Even if our house is super clean and we're cooking "easy" food - I'm like a ball of stress when people come over to our house. I've been getting better about asking for help but I can't help but to run around the house picking up after people and generally being a worry wart that our dogs are annoying, there isn't enough food/drinks, or that our guests are bored.

I hate feeling like that because I love parties! Most people in our circle know this about me so we don't have too many things at our house.

Also! I don't know why but I'm very protective about my house. As in, that's my safe place. The place I don't have to wear pants or makeup. So when I feel like I have to be the perfect hostess - it kind of kills me because this is my I'll-do-whatever-I-want space.

#deepthoughts LOL

YES

[glw]

Oh, and if it matters, we just hosted a St. Patrick's Day party on March 12th with over 60 guests in attendance. And we made all the food. My brain and my house haven't recovered yet!!

[OrangePixyStix]

Yeah.... hopefully he can understand the hectic schedule and timing of such a large event.

This is why we have a double-birthday for the H and me - our bdays are only 2 1/2 weeks apart, and the efforts and cost of doing separate parties/outings is just too much to plan so soon in the same month.   I definitely can't handle a party every month, or planning out another one around the same week with other obligations and restricted free time! 

In regards to anniversary parties, the only ones I have ever been invited to (or attended in general) were for my family members. I feel like most people just do couples trips for the big anniversaries, so it's definitely not a thing down here or in my circle to have friends involved in something like that, unless I guess if it's considered a vow renewal or something (a la Heidi Klum and Seal.... although those renewals didn't mean much at this point, eh?   :-# ).

[MyName]

Dude, he is out of his damn mind!

[glw]

[duff]

OMG, I'm on the verge of a panic attack just thinking about this.

We've done this - we used to do it every summer. But last year, I said that I just can't...it's too much work, even with MH helping, and I end up running around all night trying to keep everything going. We're going to plan another one this year, but I'm limiting it to 20 guests.

[glw]

Apr 7, 2016 16:52:51 GMT -5 duff said:

OMG, I'm on the verge of a panic attack just thinking about this.

We've done this - we used to do it every summer. But last year, I said that I just can't...it's too much work, even with MH helping, and I end up running around all night trying to keep everything going. We're going to plan another one this year, but I'm limiting it to 20 guests.

Once a year is plenty for me. We've done our St. Patrick's Day party 9 times now and it is draining. I need a long time to recover after. Plus I just don't want to clean that much again!

[latte]

No. You are totally right. It's a ton of work, and unless someone is doing it with you, they don't understand!

[honeydew1894]

Apr 7, 2016 10:39:56 GMT -5 milsaroo said:

Yes, but if it's something I enjoy doing I don't mind it.

This. I love entertaining and our friends are awesome about bringing sides. 

[sitnspin]

YES!  Even if Jer helps me plan, shop, cook, etc. it is a sh!tton of work.