Did you change your name after divorce ?

[asoctoberfalls]

I'm curious - how many of you changed your last name after your divorce, whether back to your maiden name or to something else?

My lawyer asked me that today, and I'm not sure. I don't really want to have any connection to STBXH or his husband, but it would be weird to have a different last name than my son. Also, I dread the work involved in changing everything.

I prefer my maiden name to my married name, but neither is repulsive.

[asoctoberfalls]

I meant to add an option saying I never took my ex's name, but I forgot. Oops.

[pinkdutchtulips]

SS ... I kept my maiden name so there was nothing to change back to

Eta - it's never bothered me or dd that we don't have the same last name. if I ever remarry - we'll be a 3 name household: his, mine & dd. I never envisioned changing my name, adding onto it yes but dropping mine completely never crossed my mind.

[thedutchgirl]

My divorce isn't final yet, but I'm keeping my name. I'm a partner at a BigLaw firm, and my entire working career in this city and at this firm has been with my married name. Plus I always hated my maiden name. I want to keep the same name for my career. No kids.

[cuddlyevil]

I have the option, but it's such a pain in the ass that I am waiting until I get married again. Whenever that will be.

[tevagirl]

Never changed mine.

XH changed his name to mine. He did not change it back when we got dovorced. His new wife took his name, which is actually my name.

[Mrs.Rad888]

No. I didn't want to have a different name from DD while she was still young.
I was more than happy to change it once DH and I got married, as I had always hated XH's name.

[Deleted]

I changed my name back. I was married for four years. I wasn't well established in my career or company. There is one internally used program where my old married name pops up. It's irksome when I screen share for presentations. We also had no kids. I mean if you're open to marrying again, would you change your name then?
I will likely not change my name if I get married again so I will have a different name than my future kid(s).

[flatlan]

I changed mine back to my maiden name. We were married almost 6 years, no kids.

[sessy]

I kept my married name for a lot of reasons.

1.) I like it better. It works really well with my first name

2.) all of degrees and professional certifications are in my married name

3.) it feels like my name at this point. I got married at 18 and I've had my married name for 13 years now so not a lot of time difference.

4.) easier.

[sweetchix]

I changed back to my maiden name. I still have to change it on my bank account and credit cards, but DMV and SS are done. It doesn't bother me that DDs and I have different last names. It's just a name. Although on occasion DD1 has said she wishes that were her last name too (married name is a long and difficult Polish name. Maiden name is an easy German name).

ETA: I will not change it again if I were to remarry.

[jellymankelly]

I kept it for solidarity with my kids. I know plenty of people who didn't do that, and it's worked out fine for them too. I'm going to be changing my last name after we get married next week, but I suspect that the kids' school will still call me Mrs. XHLastName, and that's fine with me, too.

[abcdefu]

I hyphenated when I got married. I dropped his name after the divorce. I went to my colleges to get new degrees with just my maiden name. His last name is a very popular last name. To this day, 6 years later, I cringe when I hear or see his last name. If I get married again, which is probably unlikely, I will not change my last name. If I have children, which is even more unlikely, I would hyphenate their last name, as long as it wasn't super long.

[TR]

I went back to my maiden name. Only thing I haven't done is my passport because $$$. If I get married again, I will change it again.

[gozf]

I changed mine, but it took me a few years. If you do want to go back to your maiden name, get it in your divorce decree. I didn't, and I had to go on a paperwork scavenger hunt at my county courthouse, which is exactly what kept me from changing it in 2011. But last year, when I knew I was starting a new job, it made sense to bite the bullet and do it.

If I get married again, I'm not changing it. My maiden name is kick-ass; my current partner's is not; and I am really not about all that paperwork again.

[marylennox]

I think I would like to change back to my maiden name. I want to cut all ties possible to stbxh and it does not bother me to have a different last name than my son.

[glitzyglow]

My lawyer put a paragraph in my divorce decree stating that something about me changing my last night from MarriedName to MaidenName should I make the decision to revert back (although in the decree, I didn't *have* to do it). I ended up legally changing my last name to my stepfather's last name. If I do marry again, I would consider hyphenating my name, but I'll never drop my current last name. It's going on my tombstone, lol.

[statlerwaldorf]

I did not change mine back. It seemed like a pain and I don't have a big connection to my maiden name. I changed my name after I got remarried.

[Deleted]

Jun 11, 2016 10:33:07 GMT -5 glitzyglow said:

My lawyer put a paragraph in my divorce decree stating that something about me changing my last night from MarriedName to MaidenName should I make the decision to revert back (although in the decree, I didn't *have* to do it). I ended up legally changing my last name to my stepfather's last name. If I do marry again, I would consider hyphenating my name, but I'll never drop my current last name. It's going on my tombstone, lol.

My married name was awful trying to spell over the phone. It also started with a Z. I write, I don't print so a Z in cursive is apparently too much for some people and they didn't know what it was. But let's be honest, I was in Mississippi mostly with my married last name. Their education system isn't the best. 

[poptart84]

I did change my name back. My xh has a Polish last name and nobody can pronounce it. Mine is back to a very easy Scandinavian name. I don't plan on marrying again but if I did, I would not change it again. My son has his dad's last name and there has been no issues with the difference.

[Mrs.Rad888]

Jun 11, 2016 10:33:07 GMT -5 glitzyglow said:

My lawyer put a paragraph in my divorce decree stating that something about me changing my last night from MarriedName to MaidenName should I make the decision to revert back (although in the decree, I didn't *have* to do it). I ended up legally changing my last name to my stepfather's last name. If I do marry again, I would consider hyphenating my name, but I'll never drop my current last name. It's going on my tombstone, lol.

I thought about doing that. My stepfather was more of a dad to me than my bio-dad ever was, and my maiden name never meant anything sentimental to me. I just ended up keeping whatever name I had at the time. If I were to get divorced again (and sometimes I wonder) I'd probably change it to my stepdad's name if it wasn't a huge PITA. The people that currently carry that name mean more to me than most people.

[jenstar]

So far I have kept mine, I have thought about changing it back but honestly I think I'm a bit too lazy to actually do it. And I like having the same last name as DS, and I just bought a new property in that name..

I never used my married name for work though, so I feel like that is a good enough compromise, although it's annoying sometimes. I set up a LinkedIn account last week and used my maiden name.

[brooke77]

I will change my name back to my maiden name. I requested it in the divorce and it's another process to legally change it, which I'll do soon.

We were married about 6 years, but separated before our 5th anniversary. I hate having his name/family name. They are local and people ask if I'm related to "so and so Smith". It's awkward. Plus I love my maiden name,

It will be a pain to change everything back, but it will be worth it.

If I marry again, I might change my name but keep my maiden name professionally.

[somersault72]

Jun 11, 2016 1:46:13 GMT -5 sessy said:

I kept my married name for a lot of reasons.

1.) I like it better. It works really well with my first name

2.) all of degrees and professional certifications are in my married name

3.) it feels like my name at this point. I got married at 18 23 and I've had my married name for 13 12 years now so not a lot of time difference.

4.) easier.

All of this, plus I felt strongly about having the same name as DS. I'm getting married this year and I don't like FI's last name nearly as much. I really want to keep my current name.

[greysgirl]

I kept mine because we have a son and also because it's a much easier name than my maiden name.

[jcm]

I changed mine back to my maiden name because I had no ties to EX. We had no children & his last name was awful & extremely difficult to pronounce. If I had a child with him I "think" I would have kept it. I really don't know though since it was never a consideration when asking for my maiden name to be my legal name after the divorce. One thing you can do is have it put in the divorce agreement then decide what you want to do later. There is no time limit on when you have to change your name. If it's in the divorce agreement then it costs you nothing if it's not it will cost you just as any name change would.

[Shreddingbetty]

Even though I had no ties to my ex I kept his last name for a couple of reasons. My maiden name is very Dutch and though to pronounce for anyone, the other was that I and just graduated from PA school and everything was in my married name. The last one was that I was in a green card at that time and it would've been a pain in the ass to change.
I got remarried 4 years later and then changed my name to my DH. I also became a citizen after I married him so that is now my official name (as in I wouldn't be able to change it back to my maiden name without having to do an official name change)
DH's ex kept his last name I guess because the kids were only 8 and 10 when they split. They are both out of college now and she got remarried about 3 years ago (as soon as alimony was done ) but still decided to stick with DHs name which to me is kind of weird