Holy hell, people. In addition to being offended by all the white fragility and dismissive attitudes, which I see have been addressed, the sheer STUPIDITY is mind boggling.
EVEN IF you have searched into your soul and truly believe your motives are pure as the driven snow and your post will make some grand point, USE SOME MOTHERFUCKING CRITICIAL THINKING SKILLS to consider how your post will be received.
Spoiler alert: NOT WELL.
NOT EVERY THOUGHT THAT POPS INTO YOUR BRAIN NEEDS TO BE COMMUNICATED TO ANOTHER HUMAN BEING.
The good thing about the word “fragility” is that it pisses people off to be called “fragile” instead of “strong” or “resilient.” It pokes at insecurity, revealing something that has real destructive power to be built on a house of cards.
Imagine that people of color start learning about race and racism from childhood, and go on to earn the equivalent of advanced degrees in the subject just to get through everyday life. But most White people are given a pat on the head in 2nd grade, a fake diploma, and told we can skip all the other classes, because this subject doesn’t really apply to us. What’s written on our diploma? “Racists are bad people. But you are good.”
When we learn that “racists are bad people”, we automatically put ourselves into the opposite category: non-racists who are well-meaning, good people.
The truth is that “good” White people do and say racist things all the time. They appropriate black hairstyles like cornrows, baby hair, and bantu knots and rebrand them as “boxer braids”, “slicked-down tendrils”, and “mini-buns.” They dress up as stereotyped members of other cultures for Halloween, and argue the Redskins name is tradition. They say things like “I don’t even see color” and “All Lives Matter.”
To that, I would like to add “the education White people need will make us uncomfortable.” Our choices are to stick with the binary, or to leave it behind and pursue knowledge that will challenge our worldview and bring discomfort. We have to build up our ability to feel uncomfortable without allowing the Chicken Little of our self-identity to squawk that the sky is falling.
the idea that we as White people are entitled to be lazy. We expect to be served knowledge about race and racism in palatable doses. We expect to rest in our fragility.
The solution: Put in work. We are not newborn babies or fancy teacups. We have the ability to actively seek knowledge and understanding.
She leaves us with this: “Stop trying to be good people. And start trying to be real people.”
Yes. In addition to denying white privilege and the fact that we have all committed micro/macro aggressions, we expect POC to teach us how not to be racist assholes...but only a little bit at a time, because we are super sensitive and it makes us uncomfortable.
I lived in Lakewood for a couple of years recently, which is part of Tacoma. Was Lakewood diverse? Well, more diverse than some areas around there ,that's for sure. Was Spokane diverse? LOFL. No. No, it was not. It was like a winter wonderland of whiteness in Spokane. We went there a few times and it was basically like being transported back to Wisconsin, land of the whitey.
Post by thatgirl2478 on Sept 12, 2016 15:26:44 GMT -5
I used to think I wasn't racist just because I wasn't OBVIOUSLY an asshole to POC. Now I'm just working on actively not being a racist, checking my thoughts and reactions is freaking exhausting - and I'm only doing it for ME! I can totally understand why folks like 05heel and sfy would decide it's easier to just NOT have white friends** - because why the fuck would I want to spend all MY energy explaining every stupid thing said or done to people who OBVIOUSLY DON'T WANT TO GET IT. Plus, it's not like we're (white people) are ever REALLY going to get it because we can't change the color of our skin to experience it first hand. But yeah, wtf, 67 pages and we're still HERE?!!?
**Edit - I don't want it to sound like they don't have ANY white friends - I think I recall them saying they had a few but not many they'd consider CLOSE
Andplusalso, if any of you not so bright heifers decide to ever come for niq , msniq , or their babies, trust that I'll give you a read that'll make what I had to say to @this look like a G-rated bedtime story we sing to children. That is all I have to say about this issue. Go about your business.
This is very kind of you to say. I feel like I'm a mediocre ally on a good day tho.
I do like the new motto though. Maybe we could add a second half of it, "... and if do you say something stupid, you aren't the only one! Figure out how to not do it the next time"
I just have to pipe in because this is my hometown. The incoming freshman class at Gonzaga is 25% students of color. So to say "everyone is white" is a bit of stretch. Is the city awash is diversity? No. But they're making strides. Like andwhat said, every place is racist, but I just hate that people decide to stereotype entire cities based on a few encounters with a-holes.
No. When a WOC comes in here and says I turned down admittance to this school because they informed me of racial incidents and their marketing materials had few POC you can't be all "oh it's not that bad I promise." Who are you to invalidate the experiences of others?
This is why I'm still hot about miso tagging me as a contrast with her oh! so! positive! experience on the boards. That rubbed me all kinds of wrong, because it's ridiculous.
4. Read above articles multiple times until you understand them
4A) Realize that you thought you understood them, but really only scratched the surface because you will never fully understand as a white person what it's like to live the experience of a POC because of your privilege buffering your experience. Go back, read again/more, make another scratch a little deeper in the surface, and repeat.
@nora LOL at your facts. Here we go again. White tears. Yes you are invalidating her experience/feelings. @starlily said she got a letter referencing racial issues at the school. I don't care if the school has a 50% minority population, if there are ongoing racial issues that is not a place that I want to voluntarily be.
Just because you might think increasing the number of people of color is indicative of better racial dynamics, that might not be the case at all.
Yeah, Milwaukee has a minority majority population and a black sheriff and usually ranks as one of the worst places for a POC to live.
I used to think I wasn't racist just because I wasn't OBVIOUSLY an asshole to POC. Now I'm just working on actively not being a racist, checking my thoughts and reactions is freaking exhausting - and I'm only doing it for ME! I can totally understand why folks like 05heel and sfy would decide it's easier to just NOT have white friends** - because why the fuck would I want to spend all MY energy explaining every stupid thing said or done to people who OBVIOUSLY DON'T WANT TO GET IT. Plus, it's not like we're (white people) are ever REALLY going to get it because we can't change the color of our skin to experience it first hand. But yeah, wtf, 67 pages and we're still HERE?!!?
**Edit - I don't want it to sound like they don't have ANY white friends - I think I recall them saying they had a few but not many they'd consider CLOSE
for me it's not even about white people being so terrible. I fully acknowledge my own terribleness! I'm a bad friend and not that exciting, so I try not to waste others' time either. At least with my black friends I don't have to justify my poor character AND my blackness. Lol. I try to keep things very simple.
I used to think I wasn't racist just because I wasn't OBVIOUSLY an asshole to POC. Now I'm just working on actively not being a racist, checking my thoughts and reactions is freaking exhausting - and I'm only doing it for ME! I can totally understand why folks like 05heel and sfy would decide it's easier to just NOT have white friends** - because why the fuck would I want to spend all MY energy explaining every stupid thing said or done to people who OBVIOUSLY DON'T WANT TO GET IT. Plus, it's not like we're (white people) are ever REALLY going to get it because we can't change the color of our skin to experience it first hand. But yeah, wtf, 67 pages and we're still HERE?!!?
**Edit - I don't want it to sound like they don't have ANY white friends - I think I recall them saying they had a few but not many they'd consider CLOSE
for me it's not even about white people being so terrible. I fully acknowledge my own terribleness! I'm a bad friend and not that exciting, so I try not to waste others' time either. At least with my black friends I don't have to justify my poor character AND my blackness. Lol. I try to keep things very simple.
Post by Jalapeñomel on Sept 12, 2016 18:15:21 GMT -5
Speaking of Hamilton, we went and saw American in Paris this weekend, and there was 1 person of color in the cast, a cast of 15+ ensemble members. It was kind of shocking (but not really). (Sorry, I got stuck at kirkette's post a couple pages back)
Random but how did you all figure out that greenheron was supergreen? That poster doesn't have any posts does she? Or were they deleted?
I think she actually posted it herself in the Pokemon thread. I think she was like "if you want to talk Pokemon come find me I'm now green heron!" Or something.
We are doing a university wide teach in on race in America in support of BLM. I have been invited to speak. I feel both an obligation to participate and completely inadequate as a speaker. BUT I WILL. Because being uncomfortable is good for this white woman and others too.
This is hitting close to home as a black cheerleader and dancer. A) Suntan or nude pantyhose don't really work on me B) My hair doesn't do that group hair thing, unless chemically straightened, and when chemically straightened, my hair gets fucked up when sweaty or wet (wilted) C) Thank god I found Modern Dance in grad school. It may be a bit interesting and expressionist at times, but it's more welcoming to dancers of color than more strict classical dance forms . I'm also glad I was 4 when that original article came out, so there's been a few (honestly very few) Black dancers since then. Sadly, not this dancer who is well under the 5'6 minimum height.
Our dance studio has a large number of POC go there, and I definitely noticed the suntan tights and shoes just don't match.
There used to not be much out there but now there is a lot. Not all studios are sensitive to that, though, or to different hair needs. It's unfortunate that many studios value conformity over all else.
I know bras were mentioned earlier, and now pantyhose.. So I just wanted to share this site. www.nubianskin.com
I'm aware of this brand. The point is not that one can purchase $16 panties and $55 bras in brown colors from a specialty site that has recently popped up.
The point is that I can walk into any Target, Walmart, JCPenny or Nordstroms and buy beige bras and panties from $20/ $5 to $100+ and any price point in between; while the same is not true of other shades of human skin tone.
Yeah, I was reminded of the Christian Louboutins that came out was it last Fall? Maybe longer ago? In any case, while a fantastic step in the right direction, those are hardly a shoe many people can purchase. Sadly I haven't seen other, more affordable brands follow suit, which was my original hope.
@nora LOL at your facts. Here we go again. White tears. Yes you are invalidating her experience/feelings. @starlily said she got a letter referencing racial issues at the school. I don't care if the school has a 50% minority population, if there are ongoing racial issues that is not a place that I want to voluntarily be.
Just because you might think increasing the number of people of color is indicative of better racial dynamics, that might not be the case at all.
Please see UCLA , it's South Orange County Sister, UCI, and at any given notice (especially when funding is limited), Cal. They stay on the verge of race riots.
I was just talking about this - UCLA has a diverse student population, but it's incredibly segregated. It was an odd experience because I had come from a diverse high school where everyone interacted, was friends/friendly with one another, etc. I'm sure there were problems there that I didn't know about, but in general, there was much more integration. UCLA so very different.
There used to not be much out there but now there is a lot. Not all studios are sensitive to that, though, or to different hair needs. It's unfortunate that many studios value conformity over all else.
I don't think the studio would have an issue, but the local store where we all get our shoes (we don't have a huge local selection) has all "nude" colored stuff. In a community where the main HS has a Hispanic rate of 52%.
Ah, my local store sucks overall, nothing is ever in stock, so I have to buy everything online.