It's kind of a complicated story but changing stylists at this particular salon doesn't change their income. I know that most salons rent chairs but this one's landlord doesn't allow subletting so changing stylists doesn't change their income, kwim? I've also talked to them about this and they don't take each other's clients as a general rule so as not to cause tensions.
There is no salon anywhere within driving distance you can go to? Surely in "farm country" you are used to driving far to get services and goods. And since you scorn highlights I'm sure you are only going 4x year tops.
I almost dumped my hair dresser who I love because she was a Bernie fan. Luckily, she switched and publicly supported Hilary at the election. I wouldn't want to go to a third party voter much less a Trump lover.
I go monthly thanks to my grays. And the further away you get from my town the redder and redder it gets. This place employs minorities and LGBTQ, something that can't be said for the other places in my area.
If I wasn't FB friend with her I never would have guessed she was so conservative.
To the OP, I would find a new stylist. I know you really like her and it can be trial and error to break in a new stylist, but if you're sincere about your values, you have to live them.
Recently, I left my favorite nail salon because one of the techs open carried on the job. First, WTF? And yeah...no thanks.
As to the other poster with the raging Trump supporting hair stylist - again, you have to live your values. If you are supporting someone whose views you oppose by giving them your business, you are de factor supporting those views. I don't get why this is so hard to understand.
There is no salon anywhere within driving distance you can go to? Surely in "farm country" you are used to driving far to get services and goods. And since you scorn highlights I'm sure you are only going 4x year tops.
I almost dumped my hair dresser who I love because she was a Bernie fan. Luckily, she switched and publicly supported Hilary at the election. I wouldn't want to go to a third party voter much less a Trump lover.
I go monthly thanks to my grays. And the further away you get from my town the redder and redder it gets. This place employs minorities and LGBTQ, something that can't be said for the other places in my area.
If I wasn't FB friend with her I never would have guessed she was so conservative.
There is no salon anywhere within driving distance you can go to? Surely in "farm country" you are used to driving far to get services and goods. And since you scorn highlights I'm sure you are only going 4x year tops.
I almost dumped my hair dresser who I love because she was a Bernie fan. Luckily, she switched and publicly supported Hilary at the election. I wouldn't want to go to a third party voter much less a Trump lover.
I go monthly thanks to my grays. And the further away you get from my town the redder and redder it gets. This place employs minorities and LGBTQ, something that can't be said for the other places in my area.
If I wasn't FB friend with her I never would have guessed she was so conservative.
Ok but now you know her views. This really isn't hard. Just admit you are ok with her views. There are other options then continuing to go to the "raging trump supporter" stylist whom I presume you tip, but you aren't willing to consider them. No one told you to move, no one told you to stop buying groceries at local stores in your conservative city, we just said stop going to the stylist who you know is openly deplorable.
ETA: and damn it's hair dye, we're not talking about receiving life saving medication from someone. There's not a beauty product in the world that I'd knowingly give money to a deplorable over.
She legitimately did think we'd cheer her on for "fighting the good fight" guys
Yes. That's exactly what I thought. You're so smart.
I didn't seriously dislike you till now. (I know you don't give a shit, blah blah. I just felt that you should know how unattractive your poorly hidden bitterness is.)
Option 3, go to your friends at the Dem club and ask for stylist recs. You might find also that the club members are people you can hang out with instead of your stylist and other friends.
The current president of the club goes to my stylist and 2 of the members work at the salon. So no. Welcome to farm town life.
I'd also like to say that you all (not the specific poster I'm replying to, a general you) really went off on a tangent of assumptions in this thread. I said I'm friends with my stylist and all of a sudden it's like I'm having weekly dinner with her and shopping on the weekends.
I am friends with people in the dem club. We hang out much more often than I do with my stylist. But there are many, many people there that did vote for him. It's not logistically possible for me to cut all of them out of my life.
I don't know how to respond.
OP, I hope you find more options for your situation.
I go monthly thanks to my grays. And the further away you get from my town the redder and redder it gets. This place employs minorities and LGBTQ, something that can't be said for the other places in my area.
If I wasn't FB friend with her I never would have guessed she was so conservative.
Ok but now you know her views. This really isn't hard. Just admit you are ok with her views. There are other options then continuing to go to the "raging trump supporter" stylist whom I presume you tip, but you aren't willing to consider them. No one told you to move, no one told you to stop buying groceries at local stores in your conservative city, we just said stop going to the stylist who you know is openly deplorable.
ETA: and damn it's hair dye, we're not talking about receiving life saving medication from someone. There's not a beauty product in the world that I'd knowingly give money to a deplorable over.
No, I'm not on with her views that I disagree with. I'm ok with knowing I have a lot of work to do to educate her and I'm doing it.
Yes. That's exactly what I thought. You're so smart.
I didn't seriously dislike you till now. (I know you don't give a shit, blah blah. I just felt that you should know how unattractive your poorly hidden bitterness is.)
You're right again. Except it's not bitterness at all.
I didn't seriously dislike you till now. (I know you don't give a shit, blah blah. I just felt that you should know how unattractive your poorly hidden bitterness is.)
You didn't ask for help but you did indicate you felt bad about your choices. There's a big difference between conducting necessary business and maintaining friendship with a raging Trump supporter. Gross.
I'm making the best choice for me. Not sorry at all. If my options are keeping an open dialogue with a friend of many years and hopefully counteracting some of the bullshit fake news she gets vs receiving validation from internet people I'll never meet then this just cements my choices. Dividing isn't helping anything. Ever since I read that piece about the white supremacist changing his mind after having an open dialogue with people he'd met its further cemented that cutting people off isn't how shit is going to get better.
I am actually going to agree with you here. Because I do think it is up to WHITE people to have the hard talks and hard relationships. Black and brown people can and should bounce, but I think it is time for WHITE people to feel some discomfort and have the hard conversations. But you better be walking the walk and not just talking the talk. And from general conversations here (not specifically regarding you because I can't keep people straight) I am not convinced that will happen. I think that people remaining friends with racists is just making them think what they are doing is ok because if it was so bad you wouldn't be in their life anymore. So I hope you are actually practicing what you are preaching here.
ETA: But that doesn't mean you need to pay her for services. I am sure there is someone else who can do your hair.
I definitely agree it's possible to still maintain a dialogue with Trump supporters while not actively supporting them professionally. Our country is still set up in terms of money talking, and the only way our systems quantify success or failure is by business is thriving or dying out. Wouldn't it be great for a Trump supporter to feel so threatened by judgment that they STFU enough to learn another way of thinking?
There are other options then continuing to go to the "raging trump supporter" stylist whom I presume you tip, but you aren't willing to consider them. No one told you to move, no one told you to stop buying groceries at local stores in your conservative city, we just said stop going to the stylist who you know is openly deplorable.
This is my issue with this.
I get it- if you live in a largely red area, you can't boycott EVERY business owned by a person who voted for Trump. But there is a difference ** between people who simply voted for Trump but go about their daily lives w/o shouting it from the rooftops and someone who is a "raging Trump supporter".
** to be clear, when I say there is a difference, I still have a VERY hard time dealing w/ ANYONE who voted for Trump. I can't rationalize it or justify it. Even the "quiet" Trump voters have made a statement by voting for him and I can't look at them the same way. But I live in a very blue area and it's easy for me to avoid these people. I can understand if you're surrounded by them, you have to find some way to draw a line. Be respectful of me and my views, I'll try - as best I can - to do the same.
But something about "raging trump supporter" says "asshole" to me.
Post by killercupcake on Dec 18, 2016 14:27:49 GMT -5
The hand wringing about not having any friends is just killing me.
Maybe I'm just cold hearted, but if my choices were "Trump supporters" or no one, I choose no one. That may just be my "moral superiority" talking though.
Post by W.T.Faulkner on Dec 18, 2016 15:53:02 GMT -5
I think I what gets me every time is not the acceptance of racism, or the excuses for it, because I know that shit goes on. I mean, it's upsetting, but look where we are. It happens all the time.
It's the posting about it here, and the expectation that it will go over well, that bowls me over every time.
The ability to make reasonable predictions is a sign of good critical reading skills, and that ability is measured in elementary school.
How this skill evades so many, who have literally read this board every day for years, is beyond my understanding.
Welp, can't say I'm suprised at the white girl ass showing taking place here, yet again. We've still got about two weeks left in 2016. This is the dumbest shit ever; I'm just wondering how many more chucklefucks won't be able to keep it together until the New Year.
I always wonder how this plays out in people's minds. Picture it: I, a grown woman, sitting in my house. Probably looking a mess, which wouldn't be important except that I'm about to go hard in the paint in defense of my racist hairstylist. Anyway, no one is talking to or about me. Then someone wants to know how to handle a sensitive situation, and I decide that THIS is the time where I'll proudly proclaim my affection for racist people. I'll be super unapologetic and nasty about it too, because I'm in mixed company and these morally superior bitches can't tell me what to do.
How am I doing? Lol. Can you imagine doing this same thing, but instead in person? Hey, look at that group of women over there! I'm going to go start some shit and get mad when they tell me to get bent.
This is how I know that there a quite a few of you just sitting out there mad as hell and salty as fuck at the uppity negroes of GBCN. Please keep outing yourselves, because it's all highly entertaining.
Welp, can't say I'm suprised at the white girl ass showing taking place here, yet again. We've still got about two weeks left in 2016. This is the dumbest shit ever; I'm just wondering how many more chucklefucks won't be able to keep it together until the New Year.
I always wonder how this plays out in people's minds. Picture it: I, a grown woman, sitting in my house. Probably looking a mess, which wouldn't be important except that I'm about to go hard in the paint in defense of my racist hairstylist. Anyway, no one is talking to or about me. Then someone wants to know how to handle a sensitive situation, and I decide that THIS is the time where I'll proudly proclaim my affection for racist people. I'll be super unapologetic and nasty about it too, because I'm in mixed company and these morally superior bitches can't tell me what to do.
How am I doing? Lol. Can you imagine doing this same thing, but instead in person? Hey, look at that group of women over there! I'm going to go start some shit and get mad when they tell me to get bent.
This is how I know that there a quite a few of you just sitting out there mad as hell and salty as fuck at the uppity negroes of GBCN. Please keep outing yourselves, because it's all highly entertaining.
The hand wringing about not having any friends is just killing me.
Maybe I'm just cold hearted, but if my choices were "Trump supporters" or no one, I choose no one. That may just be my "moral superiority" talking though.
Oh, and I agree with you. I'd rather be alone than be friends with some hateful son of a bitch. At least my own demons don't discriminate.
What is killing me, is the fact that many posters here -- and a lot of people all over the country -- are having to make really tough decisions about cutting ties with their family members, especially with their PARENTS, and some are even leaving relationships and longtime friendships, because it's time to put the pedal to the metal and stop being a passive participant in bigotry.
But ... giving up a hairstylist?! That's just too much to ask. Moms and dads are a dime a dozen. A good hairstylist is a but a unicorn.
Post by iammalcolmx on Dec 18, 2016 18:30:46 GMT -5
Who is keeping the spreadsheet? At this point we need a spreadsheet of folks who are NOT down with racist's. Too many basic bitches got excuses for keeping around their racist friends.
Yeah, it's not quite as simple as that. I'm also friends with her and I have 2 friends who work for her, one of whom is her daughter. I have been extremely vocal with her about my position but I'm not willing to pitch friendships over this election.
So next time maybe you should not be a judge mental bitch while going off minimal information.
ETA: and lol at my having highlights. Clearly you're new here.
You wouldn't ditch a racist person who was a friend? A sexist one? I think someone said this already, but yeah, I'd be gone and losing that friendship. If they were that diametrically opposed to all I hold dear, as well as to the safety of friends or family for the support so outright of a known bigot, yup, I'd be gone. Sorry on this one.
Yeah, it's not quite as simple as that. I'm also friends with her and I have 2 friends who work for her, one of whom is her daughter. I have been extremely vocal with her about my position but I'm not willing to pitch friendships over this election.
So next time maybe you should not be a judge mental bitch while going off minimal information.
ETA: and lol at my having highlights. Clearly you're new here.
You wouldn't ditch a racist person who was a friend? A sexist one? I think someone said this already, but yeah, I'd be gone and losing that friendship. If they were that diametrically opposed to all I hold dear, as well as to the safety of friends or family for the support so outright of a known bigot, yup, I'd be gone. Sorry on this one.
I've ditched several people who showed themselves during this election. This woman's primary reason for following DT was him taking about gun rights and repealing the ACA. I mentioned this earlier in the thread but it may have gotten swallowed up. At no point did I say she was racist. I denied that several times. Other people assumed she's racist because she was very vocal about supporting him (mainly because he wants to repeal the ACA which is totally stupid but she's not going to learn until it gets repealed). I get that people on there think DT's supporters are all racists. I don't necessarily agree with it because I don't think his voters are a monolith, but we've already had that discussion many times on here with no real resolution.
I always wonder how this plays out in people's minds. Picture it: I, a grown woman, sitting in my house. Probably looking a mess, which wouldn't be important except that I'm about to go hard in the paint in defense of my racist hairstylist. Anyway, no one is talking to or about me. Then someone wants to know how to handle a sensitive situation, and I decide that THIS is the time where I'll proudly proclaim my affection for racist people. I'll be super unapologetic and nasty about it too, because I'm in mixed company and these morally superior bitches can't tell me what to do.
How am I doing? Lol. Can you imagine doing this same thing, but instead in person? Hey, look at that group of women over there! I'm going to go start some shit and get mad when they tell me to get bent.
This is how I know that there a quite a few of you just sitting out there mad as hell and salty as fuck at the uppity negroes of GBCN. Please keep outing yourselves, because it's all highly entertaining.
I just read this to my family and my 5 year old is laughing so hard. She's keeps asking, "what does going hard in the paint mean" and I just keep laughing. You have a way with words that manages to reflect exactly what we are all thinking.
To the Becky with the bad hair (stylist), girl bye.
2016 has been a hella of a year. I hope 2017 brings us peace, less stupid and less ass showing.
lol! If you don't laugh...
But honestly, if you're willing to act that stank and foolish over your damn hairstylist, you'd better be sitting there looking like Beyoncé. Otherwise, you're just a raggedy simpleton who should do better.
You wouldn't ditch a racist person who was a friend? A sexist one? I think someone said this already, but yeah, I'd be gone and losing that friendship. If they were that diametrically opposed to all I hold dear, as well as to the safety of friends or family for the support so outright of a known bigot, yup, I'd be gone. Sorry on this one.
I've ditched several people who showed themselves during this election. This woman's primary reason for following DT was him taking about gun rights and repealing the ACA. I mentioned this earlier in the thread but it may have gotten swallowed up. At no point did I say she was racist. I denied that several times. Other people assumed she's racist because she was very vocal about supporting him (mainly because he wants to repeal the ACA which is totally stupid but she's not going to learn until it gets repealed). I get that people on there think DT's supporters are all racists. I don't necessarily agree with it because I don't think his voters are a monolith, but we've already had that discussion many times on here with no real resolution.
You really don't see how this is complicit racism...the support of him? No. I am sorry. If she is so vocal...what is she vocal about? I can't imagine it is about his hope to improve infrastructure. I am going to assume it is for his picks or his plans for a wall or his hope to get more people in for Russia. I just can't think of a way this will end with her not being at least a complicit racist and your doubling-down on this is some BB bullshit response. I get it is hard to not continue to dig in, but think about this. You can remain friends with her, I guess, to try to change the views, but spending funds there? Nope. And them employing LGBTQ is nice, but what is she doing, or saying, to not really ensure safety and freedom for people who are?
Post by Dig Ophelia on Dec 18, 2016 19:07:13 GMT -5
laurenpetro, why are you being so protective of this woman? It's weird to me that you are defending the fact that she voted for this RACIST, BIGOTED, WOMAN RAPING, MALIGNANT NARCISSIST.
This what caused this country to continue it's racist heritage, you know? People like you. People who ignore all of the nasty shit that your loved ones do, in favor of their "virtues", while in the meantime they continue their hateful decimation of others.
But I guess it takes all kinds. Some woman out there is married to Charles Manson.
I've ditched several people who showed themselves during this election. This woman's primary reason for following DT was him taking about gun rights and repealing the ACA. I mentioned this earlier in the thread but it may have gotten swallowed up. At no point did I say she was racist. I denied that several times. Other people assumed she's racist because she was very vocal about supporting him (mainly because he wants to repeal the ACA which is totally stupid but she's not going to learn until it gets repealed). I get that people on there think DT's supporters are all racists. I don't necessarily agree with it because I don't think his voters are a monolith, but we've already had that discussion many times on here with no real resolution.
You really don't see how this is complicit racism...the support of him? No. I am sorry. If she is so vocal...what is she vocal about? I can't imagine it is about his hope to improve infrastructure. I am going to assume it is for his picks or his plans for a wall or his hope to get more people in for Russia. I just can't think of a way this will end with her not being at least a complicit racist and your doubling-down on this is some BB bullshit response. I get it is hard to not continue to dig in, but think about this. You can remain friends with her, I guess, to try to change the views, but spending funds there? Nope. And them employing LGBTQ is nice, but what is she doing, or saying, to not really ensure safety and freedom for people who are?
She hasn't said anything since the election about anything. Frankly I don't think she understands anything on that level. She was very vocal during the election about smaller government, keeping her guns and repealing the ACA. As for what she's doing for her employees, I'm not sure how to answer that. The salon is a Safe Space in our town. Beyond that I don't know of anything. If I had to guess she likely chalked up the pussy grabbing shit to "locker room talk" but I'm not 100% sure.
Even if I could say "Not all those who voted for Trump are racists", I'd actually even MORE so have to say "they are idiots". At least if they are racist, I "get" why they voted for him.
But to say they aren't but that he's going to do X, Y, and Z.... OMG. This man doesn't give a shit about anyone but himself. He doesn't care about this country, he doesn't care about the less fortunate. He contradicts himself all the time, he doesn't read, he can't complete a thought.
But these people actually think he's going to magically help them and their lives.
I actually don't know what's worse- they are racist and voted for him because of that, or they're just complete and total idiots.
And I say this thinking about a person who I've been friends with for over 20 years, she was the MOH in my wedding. I have a hard time thinking of her as a racist. But damn. To know she voted for Trump - I can't look at her the same anymore. If she really voted for him for "whatever other reason" - I see her as a fool and an idiot.
I've ditched several people who showed themselves during this election. This woman's primary reason for following DT was him taking about gun rights and repealing the ACA. I mentioned this earlier in the thread but it may have gotten swallowed up. At no point did I say she was racist. I denied that several times. Other people assumed she's racist because she was very vocal about supporting him (mainly because he wants to repeal the ACA which is totally stupid but she's not going to learn until it gets repealed). I get that people on there think DT's supporters are all racists. I don't necessarily agree with it because I don't think his voters are a monolith, but we've already had that discussion many times on here with no real resolution.
You really don't see how this is complicit racism...the support of him? No. I am sorry. If she is so vocal...what is she vocal about? I can't imagine it is about his hope to improve infrastructure. I am going to assume it is for his picks or his plans for a wall or his hope to get more people in for Russia. I just can't think of a way this will end with her not being at least a complicit racist and your doubling-down on this is some BB bullshit response. I get it is hard to not continue to dig in, but think about this. You can remain friends with her, I guess, to try to change the views, but spending funds there? Nope. And them employing LGBTQ is nice, but what is she doing, or saying, to not really ensure safety and freedom for people who are?
I just realized I didn't reply to your first question: yes, I do. I think she's one of those people who thinks "well, this is the lesser of 2 evils (for me)". I'm also pretty sure that like the "locker room talk" excuse about women, she doesn't think he *really* believes what he says about minorities (which goes back to my previous comment about her not being smart enough to see it).
You really don't see how this is complicit racism...the support of him? No. I am sorry. If she is so vocal...what is she vocal about? I can't imagine it is about his hope to improve infrastructure. I am going to assume it is for his picks or his plans for a wall or his hope to get more people in for Russia. I just can't think of a way this will end with her not being at least a complicit racist and your doubling-down on this is some BB bullshit response. I get it is hard to not continue to dig in, but think about this. You can remain friends with her, I guess, to try to change the views, but spending funds there? Nope. And them employing LGBTQ is nice, but what is she doing, or saying, to not really ensure safety and freedom for people who are?
I just realized I didn't reply to your first question: yes, I do. I think she's one of those people who thinks "well, this is the lesser of 2 evils (for me)". I'm also pretty sure that like the "locker room talk" excuse about women, she doesn't think he *really* believes what he says about minorities (which goes back to my previous comment about her not being smart enough to see it).
So you want to be friends with her why exactly? She is either racist or you think she is too stupid to understand anything about the platform of the man she rabidly supported. Your whole argument is downright bizarre.