HELL.YES.TO.THIS.ARTICLE.

[thejackpot]

Yes!! I read it earlier and found myself nodding my head the whole time. These basic Betty ass folks can get the hell on.

[childofhiphop]

Two thoughts:

These are my thoughts and words - more articulately expressed than I ever could - that I had in kicks post on sharing her inside info on her fellowship with the white colleague.

I also think that this is part of my subconscious animosity towards my office Bully. She is a white woman who acts super entitled and righteous (even when she is dead wrong). She interrupts POC in meetings regularly. She has accused my supervisor of stealing (though it ended up being one of the White Directors), 3 WOC have quit because she acted more like the "Missus" than a manager. And now I am her next target (yeah - sike!)

[iammalcolmx]

Keep eating?

[skwcm80]

I love that article!

[DesertMoon]

Keep eating? Wtf? Why is that the helpful advice you would think to give? Also why are you eavesdropping mind your business.

[redwino]

Great article. Something that upset me recently was that I kept waiting for the mother in Get Out to say she was forced into being part of it. I gave her the benefit of the doubt through the whole movie. I just knew she was somehow a victim too. I realized that I have been conditioned to never see older white women as threats and to find some sort of justification for their shitty actions. It's bullshit.

[05heel]

This is a good article. It's funny how seemingly benign interactions can put you on edge. For me it's been when white women in my neighborhood want to have my daughter for play dates, or to meet their kids. I have no hesitation when I meet a black mom, but I swear my chest tightens when these smiling white women approach us. I'm sure they're just being friendly, but I'm uncomfortable and I just don't trust them. I need to have known you for a couple years before I expose my child to you and your kid. Sure, my daughter is young and adorable and probably a nice, safe lesson in diversity for your precious. But my bet is that their feelings aren't so fond for black people in general. I don't have the time.

[meshaliuknits]

I've noticed recently that older white women keep cutting in front of me in line. And smile at me while they do it. And then take fucking forEVer. Last time it happened BabyLiu loudly commented that the lady cut. She turned red. I bought that baby some ice cream.

[liora76]

Apr 6, 2017 9:05:06 GMT -5 @barefootbarista said:

Apr 5, 2017 15:39:59 GMT -5 05heel said:

This is a good article. It's funny how seemingly benign interactions can put you on edge. For me it's been when white women in my neighborhood want to have my daughter for play dates, or to meet their kids. I have no hesitation when I meet a black mom, but I swear my chest tightens when these smiling white women approach us. I'm sure they're just being friendly, but I'm uncomfortable and I just don't trust them. I need to have known you for a couple years before I expose my child to you and your kid. Sure, my daughter is young and adorable and probably a nice, safe lesson in diversity for your precious. But my bet is that their feelings aren't so fond for black people in general. I don't have the time.

Yes.  I'm not here for your lessons in diversity.  Go fuck yourselves.  

Honest question- Is go fuck yourselves really your reaction to every white woman who is friendly/ tries to befriend you? I understand questioning ulterior motives and being uncomfortable with invasive comments or questions but this seems extreme.

[liora76]

Apr 10, 2017 6:29:24 GMT -5 @barefootbarista said:

Apr 9, 2017 15:26:58 GMT -5 liora76 said:

Honest question- Is go fuck yourselves really your reaction to every white woman who is friendly/ tries to befriend you? I understand questioning ulterior motives and being uncomfortable with invasive comments or questions but this seems extreme.

And honestly, yes.  My reaction to most white women that I have met recently is go fuck yourselves.  

Like the one I met recently who seemed really nice, but asked me so many coded questions about my daughter's school (does anything "happen" near her school?  What's the crime like?  Is she doing so well in school because she just isn't challenged enough?)

Or the white sub at my school that is trying her damndest to figure out my financial situation because she can't fathom how I can work part time, send my kids to swim, preschool, gymnastics, a nanny, and find the money to afford summer vacations. 

Or the white woman who told me to avoid Carowinds (local amusement park) at the first of the month because the clientele changes.  

And I got an email from a parent the other week who wants to get together with my daughter so her son can practice his social skills-because that's what she is here for right, so your son can get some practice?  

And that was in the past two weeks.  So you tell me, would you not be constantly guarded?  

Absolutely. I understand having to be constantly guarded and an overall level of distrust when it comes to white women but it's quite a leap between this and "go fuck yourself" to every white woman that smiles at you. I'm sorry I didn't mean to offend- I'll go fuck myself.

[liora76]

I can assure you that I am not a simpleton. I also am wary of some white women and their motives so I absolutely understand these feelings. That said I also have a strong dislike for assholes in general so I'll see myself out of this thread.

[andwhat]

Every day you guys are making me happier that the school that was 75+% white rejected DD.

[liora76]

Apr 10, 2017 7:19:55 GMT -5 @barefootbarista said:

Apr 10, 2017 7:12:59 GMT -5 liora76 said:

I can assure you that I am not a simpleton. I also am wary of some white women and their motives so I absolutely understand these feelings. That said I also have a strong dislike for assholes in general so I'll see myself out of this thread.

But you are being simple.  You read this thread in a simplistic way.  Did you even read the responses from the black women who responded?  You let your hurt feelings and offended status completely disregard the daily experiences we face.

Simple.  

I responded to 05heel -who said this: Sure, my daughter is young and adorable and probably a nice, safe lesson in diversity for your precious



My response: Yes. I'm not here for your lessons in diversity. Go fuck yourselves.



Your simple response: Is go fuck yourselves really your reaction to every white woman who is friendly/ tries to befriend you?



If that is all that you got from reading the article and responses, your response is simple.  

I think the article is spot on.  What I got from the bolded above was this is your response to all white women who are friendly and yes I feel that it is extreme.  So is telling an internet stranger who is also a WOC to go fuck herself for asking a question for clarity. 

[liora76]

Apr 10, 2017 7:48:29 GMT -5 @246baje said:

Apr 10, 2017 7:12:59 GMT -5 liora76 said:

I can assure you that I am not a simpleton. I also am wary of some white women and their motives so I absolutely understand these feelings. That said I also have a strong dislike for assholes in general so I'll see myself out of this thread.

So now we are assholes. Lol.

Don't let the door hit ya where the good Lord split ya!

I wasn't referring to you.

[liora76]

Apr 10, 2017 8:07:53 GMT -5 @tooshort said:

I think the point of this board is to have a safe place in which we don't have to explain ourselves. There is no need for the asterisk because we all give each other the benefit of the doubt. I didn't read lolli's post and think, "um I bet she hates all white women. I bet they smile and she says go fuck yourself". I knew what she meant. This is our safe place.

I understand the need for a safe place. My intention was not to make her feel that she had to explain or defend herself and for that I apologize.  @barefootbarista,   (I hope that was lolli that I just tagged).

[iammalcolmx]

Apr 10, 2017 8:07:53 GMT -5 @tooshort said:

I think the point of this board is to have a safe place in which we don't have to explain ourselves. There is no need for the asterisk because we all give each other the benefit of the doubt. I didn't read lolli's post and think, "um I bet she hates all white women. I bet they smile and she says go fuck yourself". I knew what she meant. This is our safe place.

Edited because I thought the poster was Black

[kicks]

Apr 10, 2017 8:18:32 GMT -5 liora76 said:

Apr 10, 2017 8:07:53 GMT -5 @tooshort said:

I think the point of this board is to have a safe place in which we don't have to explain ourselves. There is no need for the asterisk because we all give each other the benefit of the doubt. I didn't read lolli's post and think, "um I bet she hates all white women. I bet they smile and she says go fuck yourself". I knew what she meant. This is our safe place.

I understand the need for a safe place. My intention was not to make her feel that she had to explain or defend herself and for that I apologize.  @barefootbarista,   (I hope that was lolli that I just tagged).

Are you black?

[andwhat]

I'm am so confused right now

[liora76]

Apr 10, 2017 9:20:14 GMT -5 @kirkette said:

What in the world? Is all of this really coming from a person of color, or is it someone woke with an avatar (who's white or passing for white)"trying to be down".

We (POC) usually don't have to explain these subtle things to other POC in this level of great detail. So, something just isn't sitting right.

The immediate side-eye to this "Good Christian Bitches" style of racism, is one of the things that instantly unites us.

smh

As I have said many times in the thread I completely understand being wary, distrustful, guarded, etc. when interacting with white women and I'm not Christian so I have no idea where you pulled that from.  I honestly was just conversing, I didn't need and didn't ask for multiple explanations from different posters about why WOC feel guarded around white people. I get it and have said so many times.  Lolli's second response answered my question about where she was coming from.  I was excited to find and join this board so yeah the "Go fuck Yourself" threw me.  I already apologized to Lolli for making her feel that she had to defend herself, that was not my intent but clearly I did so I truly apologize again.  ETA: And no I am not white or passing.

[liora76]

Apr 10, 2017 9:18:03 GMT -5 kicks said:

Apr 10, 2017 8:18:32 GMT -5 liora76 said:

I understand the need for a safe place. My intention was not to make her feel that she had to explain or defend herself and for that I apologize.  @barefootbarista ,   (I hope that was lolli that I just tagged).

Are you black?

No. I'm a lovely shade of brown.

[05heel]

Apr 10, 2017 9:43:25 GMT -5 liora76 said:

Apr 10, 2017 9:18:03 GMT -5 kicks said:

Are you black?

No. I'm a lovely shade of brown.

that is more than enough out of you, ma'am.

[liora76]

Apr 10, 2017 9:48:51 GMT -5 05heel said:

Apr 10, 2017 9:43:25 GMT -5 liora76 said:

No. I'm a lovely shade of brown.

that is more than enough out of you, ma'am.

:Y:  I've done my best to explain myself but I'm just upsetting people and I don't want that.  I hope Lolli accepts my apology but I really am going to stop posting in this thread.

[skwcm80]

Apr 9, 2017 19:43:38 GMT -5 cubed said:

I've had enough of white women pretending I'm not standing in line and try to cut me off. I used to try and ignore but now I don't hesitate to side step and just go when the person in front of me is done. No more. You can see my wide ass a mile away.

A white woman did this to my DD and I lost my shit. Bet she won't do it again. 

Who am I kidding? She probably already has.

[thejackpot]

Lovely shade of brown?
What does that even mean?

[kicks]

Apr 10, 2017 9:43:25 GMT -5 liora76 said:

Apr 10, 2017 9:18:03 GMT -5 kicks said:

Are you black?

No. I'm a lovely shade of brown.

Ok so then don't go tell us black women that are views are extreme.

There are not just black people posting in the WOC board but in case you didn't notice we didn't turn this space in to a place to question if we're having extreme views about white people. Of course we don't always have the same opinions on everything, but it should be pretty easy to understand why many of us are fed up with white people (spoiler alert, some posters are even married to white people), and don't need to go explaining ourselves on our board.

[kicks]

Apr 10, 2017 9:43:39 GMT -5 @natariru said:

I literally sent this text to my H yesterday.


Is it extreme? Who knows, I don't fucking care. I've spent years being the "token" funny brown girl that everyone pretended to be friends with until their parents found out I lived in Newark. I'm not letting that shit happen with my kids. Do I have white "friends"? Sure. But it took a LONG time to let them in and I don't have room, patience, or energy for any more. I'm with @barefootbarista, smile at me all you want but keep it moving... we will never be friends.

Lol. I sent a similar text to my boyfriend. Along with telling him that I researched Trinidad more extensively and that we should move there in the next 10-15 years because I just can't with white people anymore.. Trinidad has the 3rd highest GDP in the americas after the US and Canada, so I was like perfect! Plus his family already has 2 houses there.

[05heel]

Apr 10, 2017 10:32:40 GMT -5 thejackpot said:

Lovely shade of brown?
What does that even mean?

it means I'm trying way too hard to be cute and failing miserably

[iammalcolmx]

Apr 10, 2017 9:43:39 GMT -5 @natariru said:

I literally sent this text to my H yesterday.


Is it extreme? Who knows, I don't fucking care. I've spent years being the "token" funny brown girl that everyone pretended to be friends with until their parents found out I lived in Newark. I'm not letting that shit happen with my kids. Do I have white "friends"? Sure. But it took a LONG time to let them in and I don't have room, patience, or energy for any more. I'm with @barefootbarista , smile at me all you want but keep it moving... we will never be friends.

Is this why you started listening to Biggie yesterday?

[iammalcolmx]

Apr 10, 2017 11:39:05 GMT -5 @kirkette said:

Apr 10, 2017 9:40:34 GMT -5 andwhat said:

I'm am so confused right now

Word!
I mean, I saw the "I'm not Christian blaty blah blah" in response to my GCB racism allusion, so I knew this poster was lost on life.
I quickly Noped the fuck out of reading anymore of her paragraph.
Not worth the time it would take to catch her ass up.
Because ... a lovely shade of brown.
Da Fuq?

Oh can you ask you peeps if folks are going to come at me sideways in Scotland? I don't need any BS. @natariru, already warned me about Portugal but my cousin says they will think I am American and not bug me.

[childofhiphop]

Apr 10, 2017 6:29:24 GMT -5 @barefootbarista said:

Apr 9, 2017 15:26:58 GMT -5 liora76 said:

Honest question- Is go fuck yourselves really your reaction to every white woman who is friendly/ tries to befriend you? I understand questioning ulterior motives and being uncomfortable with invasive comments or questions but this seems extreme.

And honestly, yes.  My reaction to most white women that I have met recently is go fuck yourselves.  

Like the one I met recently who seemed really nice, but asked me so many coded questions about my daughter's school (does anything "happen" near her school?  What's the crime like?  Is she doing so well in school because she just isn't challenged enough?)

Or the white sub at my school that is trying her damndest to figure out my financial situation because she can't fathom how I can work part time, send my kids to swim, preschool, gymnastics, a nanny, and find the money to afford summer vacations. 

Or the white woman who told me to avoid Carowinds (local amusement park) at the first of the month because the clientele changes.  

And I got an email from a parent the other week who wants to get together with my daughter so her son can practice his social skills-because that's what she is here for right, so your son can get some practice?  

And that was in the past two weeks.  So you tell me, would you not be constantly guarded?  

@barefootbarista, you are so better than me in that you took the time to explain! 

You feel how you feel.  No explanation needed on this board.  Or so I thought?!?!?