NWPR: Kid Logistics at OOT Wedding

[callmekd]

let us know what you decide!

[ECB]

Your cynicism may not be totally off the mark. And there's probably also a mix of "Oh- but they have kids. I'm SURE they'd want to bring them!!" And are just trying to be nice. In the example I mentioned earlier, that was a part of my thought process when thinking I'd include my friend's DD.

I was glad they felt comfortable enough to tell me that they'd really rather not bring her!

IDK. For the truly right wedding where it was clear what was going on, I knew what the resources would be, etc, I might suck it up. But for a wedding where there is just SO much unknown ... AND for the fact that your kids will be the only kids, it's not going to be accomdating to kids.

And to say "We want DS in the wedding!!!!!" Then turn around and talk about. "I can't wait until the party bus!!!!!" - eh - it's SO clear that they aren't thinking about how one affects the other. THey are making decisions in a vaccum and not thinking abou the big picture. And in the end, your needs - ONE guest out of however many - are not going to be high on their priority list the day of.. They are going to be busy and preoccupied.

[kimberlybb]

I'm also team keep the kids home. When my brother and sister-in-law got married we debated taking our kids. When we figured out it wasn't going to be a child-friendly event, we left them home. It sounds like this wedding isn't going to be very child friendly either. I was able to enjoy all the wedding festivities more since I didn't have to stress about kid/bedtime logistics. If you do decide to take the kids I second niki 's recommendation about the zoo. I'm not a zoo person and even I think it is amazing.

[ilovelucyvv]

My DS will be a few months shy of 3 when he is a ring bearer in a family OOT wedding next year. I wasn't worried about it before but now I am a liitle. The 10 month old Id probably leave at home

[saraml13]

Update: DH got a few more details at the bachelor party. DS1 is more than welcome at all wedding related events - getting ready, pictures, wedding party bus, reception. It sounds like the baby sitter has only been offered to us. So that had me leaning towards "yes".

However, I tried to reserve a suite at the hotel now that we finally found out which hotel, and there are no suites available. I do not want to and I don't expect a babysitter to either, sit around being quiet in a dark hotel room after bedtime. DH is checking with the groom to see if he has a hold on any suites that he's not actually going to use, but if not this will put me firmly in the "no" camp.

[frozenpeas]

saraml13, it might be worth asking the hotel if they have 2 adjoining rooms available, assuming you're willing to pay for 2 rooms. You can leave the door open between them. Sometimes that's actually what certain hotels mean by "suite", anyway.

[2chatter]

@saraml - is there an airbnb in the block or so around the hotel? May be worth checking...we used points for our most recent wedding and were about a half block away - it was NBD - we went to their hotel bar after then home to our own.

[saraml13]

frozenpeas, 2chatter, there are definitely potential work arounds if we really have to bring the kids. They wouldn't be ideal because there is a shuttle to/from the hotel and DH has FOMO about missing out on things happening there. The hotel does have actual suites with sitting room areas that are all booked up. I'm not wild about the 2 connecting rooms idea, since DS1 is going through a phase of opening/closing doors. I worry about him having direct access to the hallway.

Mostly I've just gotten to the stage of being super annoyed about this wedding. It's a holiday weekend with at least 2/3 of the guests from out of town and we just now got hotel information that we've asked for repeatedly, only to find that the suites are all gone. So this is sort of my excuse to throw up my hands and say eff it.

[2chatter]

@saraml - we totally shuttled from our nearby hotel - we just met the wedding folks in the lobby like everyone else - we just didn't shower or sleep there. Zero FOMO, promise! I can't believe the beat down this wedding is - the hotel thing would really really irritate me (milder language than what's in my head!).

[frozenpeas]

saraml13 - I get it, it would take a lot of effort & coordination to make this work. If you're determined to do it, I think you have options to look into. But if you're looking for a reasonable excuse to say no way, you have plenty to choose from.

[ECB]

I said it before but it seems like they are throwing ideas out of "Oh- this would be cool", "This would be fun", etc.  but not thinking about the actual logistics. 1 + 1 is not = 2 for them.

I would stop jumping through hoops and figure out what works best for your family of 4 and go from there.  And if what works best is that the kids don't go, then they don't go.  

You talk about your DH having FOMO.  Honestly- having your kids there will most likely mean he's going to end up missing out on something at some point.  If he wants to be able to go in and take part in all the fun wedding/adult stuff- don't have the kids there.  Even if you plan to shoulder 90% of the burden, there will always be a chance that something comes up that will require his help.