Quick Q re: realtors

[HeartofCheese]

Is there anything I need to do before meeting with a realtor for the first time to sell our house?

I assume it's an appraisal and it occurred to me that I should probably make sure the house is in top-condition, but it's (so) not. In fact, my cleaning is going to be limited to whatever I can do in 15 min before he gets there. Should I postpone? What things I should mention to the realtor?

Also, is it typical to get more than one appraisal? Do you sign a contract? How do you shop around for a good agent? We're just meeting with the guy who sold us our house, but he's with a new agency now. Does the standard fee vary much? Is it okay to cry in front of the realtor should I be so moved?

Got any other info or tips? 

[frozenpeas]

Others who have done this more recently than me can chime in, but from what I remember . . .

Don't worry too much about decluttering now. The realtor can advise you on what to address/where to focus your time & energy.

Fees are pretty standard, I think, & a % of the selling price.

I believe you will have to sign a contract, but my rule of thumb is to never sign anything right away. I'd ask for a copy and a few days to look it over before signing.

He probably won't do a true appraisal but will pull up some comps for you. Try not to be alarmed at the results.

I cried in front of my realtor. More than once.

[mommyatty]

It's not an appraisal but he will give you an idea of market value, comps, and what you should list for.

Don't worry about decluttering. And you will likely not be the first one this week to cry.

Don't sign anything today. Ask to look over paperwork.

[saraml13]

Ditto what PPs have said. Also, it's probably worthwhile to make a list of major mechanical work you've done on the house. For example, new roof in 2013, new A/C in 2016. That kind of stuff can be hard to remember on the spot.

[akafred]

It's def not an appraisal. He will tell you what he thinks you should ask for it and what he thinks it will sell for. But keep in mind that if he gets a standard 3% commission and splits that say 70/30 with his firm, then a $10,000 difference in sales price is only $210 profit for him. It is in his best interest to get it sold as fast and with as little effort as humanly possible. That's not to say he'll intentionally undercut your home'a value, but his motivations are just different from yours. So keep that in mind. In my market homes have been selling super fast and the prices have been escalating; most people I know had realtors say the home was worth $10-30k less than it actually sold for. And they all sold in under a week. I know one person who had a commercial realtor friend come over for dinner and he asked what their realtor was going to ask and then laughed and said ask for 20k more. He got multiple offers and the house sold for $10k over ask, which was the $20k over what the realtor said.

The realtor will base the estimate on the current condition, but will also recommend where to concentrate your time and money on maintenance and decluttering. In our case he noticed things like small gaps at the door molding that I very easily caulked myself, a ceiling that needed to be painted that I wouldn't have otherwise, etc. We didn't sign anything until a couple weeks later when we were ready to list and start showing.

Good luck!

[traveltheworld]

I agree with others - don't worry about de-cluttering. A good realtor would be able to see past all that. When we were considering selling our home, we met with a few realtors. We eventually went with one who seemed the most professional and had the best track record of selling in our area. She suggested staging our house (she'd take care of the staging), media tours, and provided us with a detailed assessment and analysis of how she came up with her proposed listing price (including comparables around the area).

I'm not sure what your area is like, but for our old neighborhood, it was really important to have the house staged - as our realtor tells us, it's all about selling a lifestyle and conveying a story. She replaced our art, added a whack load of pillows/cushions, and just re-did the decor of the place. It looked amazing after she was done.

You should also take a look at some of the realtor's current listings to get a sense of how well/not well he/she presents the listing. We are always astounded that some realtors don't even get professional pictures done.

Once you've narrowed down which realtor you are going with - you typically do sign a contract.

[HeartofCheese]

How do I find out the realtor's track record?

ETA: Never mind. Figuring it out.

[sandandsea]

Don't sign until you've met with at least a couple of realtors. You need to know their commission too. 6% is standard but many\most in our area are at 5% now.

They should give you an idea of pricing, discuss marketing plans, days on market, expectations etc.

They should see past clutter and discuss staging too.

[supertrooper1]

We've never signed a contract until we listed our house with the realtor. Usually they're for 90 days.
Don't worry about decluttering or cleaning until he needs to take pictures.

[vasc]

You'll want to know how the realtor will market your property.

[akafred]

Jul 19, 2017 14:15:22 GMT -5 sandandsea said:

Don't sign until you've met with at least a couple of realtors. You need to know their commission too. 6% is standard but many\most in our area are at 5% now.

They should give you an idea of pricing, discuss marketing plans, days on market, expectations etc.

They should see past clutter and discuss staging too.

In my area 3% is standard but that is per realtor. So 6% total.

[waverly]

Try not to cry, but if you do cry that is what you are paying them for, so they should handle it fine.

We've never sold only bought. We got the appraisal on the buyers end to assist with the mortgage. I don't think they did it on the sellers end. We've also gotten them for re-finance, and it was low. They came again a year later in a better market, and it was higher.

I do think I should have cleaned before the first appraisal (but again not selling just re-fi). Don't worry too much about cleaning with the real estate agent. They will tell you to declutter I am sure and maybe stage but that can all come later after the first discussion.

[greenmonkey1]

If you have time I would meet with another realtor just for comparison. I would also ask how they market the house - do they do open houses, do they have a team of realtors or do you work with just the one, etc.

[akafred]

HeartofCheese, how did it go?

((Hugs))

[HeartofCheese]

Hugs back, akafred. Thanks so much for asking.

He's going to get back to us with comps, but we can't list it until the roof is done in August. Well - we could, but won't.

In the meantime, H and I talked and we both feel pretty good about being able to work together to get everything done. He's on board with the divorce and we've been in agreement on a lot of the details. The only *tiny little* detail he doesn't agree about is that he's verbally abusive and I'm having trouble trying to figure out how to protect my kids if they don't want to go over there. I proposed that we agree on an age when we start listening to their preferences, but a bit at a loss for other suggestions. H needs counseling, end of story, but he definitely doesn't agree and it wouldn't do any good if I forced him.

Also in the meantime, my overanxious mom is trying to line up housing before we've even listed the house. But she's convinced me to go look at a smaller, cheaper house that is in prime location with the promise that they will help me buy it and keep it. Nothing like a high pressure cooker at the wheel. I should stop talking to her...

[akafred]

HeartofCheese, your mom is trying to protect you. Accept her help. The less you have to worry about right now, the better.

Small detail, huh? Have you consulted an attorney? Can they pressure him to get some kind of counseling or parenting class as a condition of the divorce? In my state I know parenting classes are mandated for all divorcing parents. Not sure about counseling but most people I know who have divorced have done it. You can agree to counseling too, just to move on. Make it seem standard. Of course I would be hoping that the divorce will help him in some ways. Maybe he'll become super dad when he only has to do it part time. But chances are whenever pressure builds in his life again, he'll revert to abuse.

Anyway, ((hugs)) again. I'm so sorry. This sucks. But it's going to be better with time. This is the hump. It will be downhill soon.

[xctsclrx]

I am going to disagree with letting the kids decide if they want to go do their dad's house. If they can give you concrete reasons why. Not dad is being mean, but dad calls me a loser or makes fun of me constantly with examples, then maybe.

Also if he denies that he is absuive mentally then start writing down examples now. Then show him at the end of the month. He may not recognize what constitutes abuse. It may not help you right now but it might make him more aware and if a judge or councilor sees them they might make him see the light.

Not trying to be a jerk here but trying to give a realistic approach to protect you and your kids as much as possible but still respecting his rights as a father and what the courts may or may not do.

[mommyatty]

If you can tape a diatribe, do it. And get a lawyer now if you don't have one. Like TODAY. When abusive people feel they are losing control, they lash out.

Also, plan on getting a statement from the neighbor who was going to call the cops. It's probably embarrassing to you. But start getting used to the idea anyway. Swallow pride to help protect your kids.

Hugs. I'm proud of you. Really, I am. What you are doing is hard and scary and brave and tremendous.

[erinshelley21]

I was MIA yesterday due to a meeting and four hours of driving, but I second what mommyatty said. You are so brave and I can't imagine the amount of thoughts running through your head right now. You can do this though. We are here to help you in any way.

[freezorburn]

I'm gonna repeat what I said before -- there is no law against being an asshole. The courts do not want to get involved unless it's related to health or safety, criminal negligence, that sort of thing. They are not there to make rulings about what they view as one parent's word against the other's. They don't want to decide where the line is between a parenting style and abuse.

Parenting class that I had to take was mostly about what people needed to know about the legal system, if they were choosing to proceed without the help of a lawyer. Oh, and a HBO documentary about the effects of divorce on children, in case you don't feel bad enough already. I bawled through the whole thing. Good times.

What has helped me manage, is cultivating ways to keep XH accountable. I've maintained relationships with my XILs and with several of his closest friends. I tell them it's not about choosing a side, it's about everybody being supportive of DS. This limits his ability to manipulate their perception of our situation, since they all know they can talk directly to me.

Also we have continued to meet with our divorce coach once a month, and that also provides an element of accountability, especially when we need to work on areas of disagreement. We have different parenting styles -- which came as a surprise to me, since we had talked extensively about how we viewed parenting before we were married, and were married for many years before having DS. But he seems to have received a personality transplant in recent years, so I am dealing with a stranger and not with the person I thought I married. C'est la vie.

[waverly]

HeartofCheese , I think buying a house is a bit much for right this second, but maybe your mom can help you find a rental.

As far as preferences for visitation, I don't think that really occurs unless in the agreement. Meaning when my parents were divorced, I had to go to my dad's regardless of preference by what the court had for mandated visitation until 18.  I couldn't change it by whim later on without them going back to court.  I wrote a letter to the court as a child, and they responded by telling me I had to go for visitation.  

My dad did give me the option for where to live for primary custody, but I was 12. He did every other weekend I have the feeling that nowadays that might look more like joint custody rather than primary custody and weekend visitation because I think more dads are seeking joint custody.