Team building - ugh

[akafred]

My group does a lot of team building. Some of it is fun, some less so. But the next one is going to be torturous for me (an extremely anxious introvert). They are doing a personality test (DISC, I think), but instead of answering the questions, your coworkers answer the questions about you, all sitting around together. I am completely 100% not ok with this. I have been having nightmares about it. I know my coworkers like me and won't say anything ugly but I cannot tolerate being talked about like that. I really, really, really do not want to go. I may call in sick or I may just refuse. I may find a new job. I just cannot do it. I don't want to ruin my career but I am ready to burn my whole career down to not do this. My body reacts just thinking about it. Literal panic attacks, like I am in physical danger.

Of course, if I raise a stink, that has its own set of ugliness I don't want to face. ETA talk to me about this. But don't tell me I am wrong. Lol

[2chatter]

Tell me HR isn't running that?? I would report it to them. That's....asking for it. Really weird idea. We aren't even allowed to share our full disc reports.

[covergirl82]

So...I work in HR and I got my Bachelor's degree in Psychology. I have never heard of other people doing someone's DiSC assessment. That is not right.

[indyrowergirl]

Time for an anonymous call to HR.

[k3am]

Wow. This one takes the cake. I don't know of anything more awkward.

[justcheckingin73]

The introvert in me is having major anxiety for you. This is not ok. 

[twinmomma]

That just made me feel sick reading it. That's a terrible, terrible idea. You need to talk to HR about it. There's no way you're the only person feeling like this!

[xctsclrx]

I think this would be totally different if it was peer evaluations. (which I don't like either) However, they might be trying to do something to help extroverts understand introverts, I have a feeling an extrovert planned this. It does not sound like fun. Not One Bit.

[leap]

Seriously, who thought that was a good idea? I wouldn't go. I feel panicky just reading about it. Terrible, terrible idea.

[phdmomma]

I'm an extrovert and this would make me uncomfortable. Can you talk to HR confidentially?

[mamaturtle]

I would first anonymously call hr.

Second, I would take a day off and not go.

My boss dreams of giving a retreat and wants us to present to each other and then we would critique each other. She also wants us to rehearse calling students and whatever other skills we lack to get peer trained from each other.

I hope this never happens because I don't want to go.

[supertrooper1]

I would be sick that day.

[akafred]

I will not be calling HR lol. I will instead be hiding in my corner. But no it isn't put on by HR. Our group fun planner decided on it and is hiring someone who does this regularly. I am freaked out. But at least glad it's not just me.

[frozenpeas]

I'm sad that you don't have a manager you feel you can go to with this. I understand that you don't want to draw attention to yourself by contacting HR, but there should be someone more senior than you who doesn't mind being the squeaky wheel. Is there anyone you feel comfortable going to who can advocate for you? There must be others who feel the same way.

You shouldn't have to do something that makes you so uncomfortable, and your only alternative shouldn't be to feel you're doing something wrong by ditching it. We all have to do things we don't like, but I'm sure this kind of thing wasn't in your job description.

[akafred]

I just don't want to be the squeaky wheel. They do fun and awesome stuff all the time (escape rooms, nice lunches, laser tag, minor league ball game). I don't want to be "that" person but I *really* don't want to be the center of attention like that in a group setting. I try to go with it when it is fun, safe, and scary. But this doesn't feel fun or safe. Definitely scary.

[frozenpeas]

Aug 1, 2017 20:57:04 GMT -5 akafred said:

I just don't want to be the squeaky wheel. They do fun and awesome stuff all the time (escape rooms, nice lunches, laser tag, minor league ball game). I don't want to be "that" person but I *really* don't want to be the center of attention like that in a group setting. I try to go with it when it is fun, safe, and scary. But this doesn't feel fun or safe. Definitely scary.

I totally understand--I just wish someone could be the squeaky wheel for you. I'm a manager and I consider that part of my job--giving my team a safe place to voice their concerns & then advocating for them (when it makes sense). Or, I help them identify alternative solutions when they can't have exactly what they want. They aren't being squeaky wheels when they come to me--I'm there to support them. I wish you had someone like that.

[akafred]

I love my boss, I really do. He is great. But I work on not being too negative especially at work (I can be a little cynical -- shocking I know) and don't want to perpetuate that. The other people who were talking about it were so positive about it. I wasn't super into it because personality tests, meh, but I can handle your Myers Briggs stuff and did not say anything negative, but when she said enthusiastically that this one is different because you rate each other in the different scenarios, I literally blanched. I even said I would be sick that day, was too much of an introvert for that, and she said, "Don't be so negative, it'll be fun!" So I don't feel like this is the sort of thing I should elevate, but I also do not want to participate.

In other news I was told I was on drugs today by someone who walked up and said in a bitchy voice, "Whatever drugs you're on, send some my way" and then stormed off before I could ask what she was talking about. I actually think she has some underlying good points. My boss thinks she was joking. No.

[mommyatty]

At our recent leadership training, each person at the table had to write two adjectives to describe each person at the table, then put them under the person's name on a big white board. Then we had to read the ones under our name out to the group. You could tell we were ALL mortified and uncomfortable, even though every single thing about every single person was positive.

So I cannot imagine how creepy and uncomfortable this is going to be. I vote develop a terrible migraine that day. One that requires a massage and maybe even a pedicure to help you deal with the pain.

[waverly]

I would arrange a paid day off or be sick that day. I've skipped work before because of a trigger event planned for work. No one knew it was a trigger for me, and I chose not to share that.

Also co-workers have told me I am in drugs too because I am calm. Well just because I save my freak outs for home rather than work doesn't mean I am calm or on drugs. I'm not on anything. I am not sure why the fact I appear calm is something people talk about or why other people think freaking out at work is normal. I thought most people present a more professional face at work, but could be wrong on that one.