Thursday things

[cuddlyevil]

Hey ladies! Anything good going on today?

I'm working OT tonight which is good because I have gotten into a funk and it will distract me. I am pmsing hard so it's making it worse but I am really starting to think that I am going to be alone forever and that I should just accept it now. #debbiedowner

[doglove]

What happened with the dude cuddlyevil? Did you ask him out??

[udscoobychick]

I did my good deed for the day. I went pulled into the parking lot at work, and there was a woman parked there with a baby carrier sitting on the ground outside the car. She waved me over and told me that the baby wouldn't sleep last night, so she drove around for a while until he fell asleep, pulled into the parking lot, and accidentally fell asleep with the headlights still on, so her battery was dead. Thankfully, I always carry jumper cables, so I was able to give her a jump so she could get home! Helping someone is always a good way to start the day.

[doglove]

I sold my wedding rings yesterday and feel like a huge weight is lifted off of me. My stitch fix box is coming today too, woot!

[bullygirl979]

cuddlyevil, hugs to you!

[cuddlyevil]

Aug 17, 2017 7:19:14 GMT -5 doglove said:

What happened with the dude cuddlyevil? Did you ask him out??

Yep, got a "possibly" then he went silent while trying to figure out when. There's been no direct contact since, despite me reaching out a couple times. I never knew if he was dating (he wasn't dating per a mutual friend back in March) or interested in me for sure, but now I guess I do.


He is a friend, so it's possible that he didn't want to hurt my feelings but silence isn't the way to go.

[bullygirl979]

Aug 17, 2017 8:16:08 GMT -5 doglove said:

I sold my wedding rings yesterday and feel like a huge weight is lifted off of me. My stitch fix box is coming today too, woot!

Yay and yay! I want pictures

[doglove]

I'm sorry cuddlyevil, that is sucky. You definitely deserve someone who can communicate and talk to you about it rather than just not talking to you. That is very infuriating behavior.

[kaneen]

Happy Thursday everyone! This week has been insanely busy at work and next week isn't looking any better.

There's a guy at work that I thought was flirting with me but I suggested we grab a drink and he never took me up on it. He always was like, "yes, we need to do that" but then would never plan anything. This morning he sends me a text that says, "Made it to Thursday...thinking it's time for a drink." Great, awesome, yippee...except I have to go to South Carolina today for meetings tomorrow. Boo.

[doglove]

Ugh kaneen!

[bullygirl979]

I'm kind of in a funk this week. I was almost near a panic attack yesterday, because I was convinced I have stomach cancer. I've lost 13 pounds in 10 weeks. When that mutual friend was diagnosed with stage IV cancer, my other friend said she wasn't surprised, as she lost a ton of weight and wasn't trying that hard to lose it.

If I'm being rational, I know that I've been watching my diet, not going out to eat very often, not drinking a ton, etc. But I absolutely freaked out yesterday. I don't know what is wrong with me.

[doglove]

That is a lot of weight in 10 weeks bullygirl979, but I think ~1 pound weight loss a week if you are trying is pretty normal/healthy. Is it normally that easy for you to drop weight so quickly with a diet change and less alcohol? (Also if it is, I'm jealous!)

Can you see your doctor to allay your fears?

[bullygirl979]

doglove, I don't think I've ever watched my diet this much? I think before I tried to lose weight with exercise, and this time I'm trying to lose it with diet. I did a quick calculation of my caloric intake for Tuesday and it was between 1300-1500 calories and my TDEE is 1450 calories. So, given I'm eating around my TDEE and no more, I'm not surprised I lost that much weight.

[doglove]

Aug 17, 2017 9:45:59 GMT -5 bullygirl979 said:

doglove , I don't think I've ever watched my diet this much? I think before I tried to lose weight with exercise, and this time I'm trying to lose it with diet. I did a quick calculation of my caloric intake for Tuesday and it was between 1300-1500 calories and my TDEE is 1450 calories. So, given I'm eating around my TDEE and no more, I'm not surprised I lost that much weight.

Your metabolism could be greater though, which may explain a greater loss. I know the web does the calorie figuration for BMR and it's typically pretty accurate, but sometimes can be wrong. Mine says 1405 and when I did a metabolic breath test with a registered dietitian, she said I was actually burning 2050 calories a day at rest. 


Cutting out alcohol though can be a significant change though! I lose faster if I give it up/cut way back. 

[bullygirl979]

Aug 17, 2017 10:01:58 GMT -5 doglove said:

Aug 17, 2017 9:45:59 GMT -5 bullygirl979 said:

doglove , I don't think I've ever watched my diet this much? I think before I tried to lose weight with exercise, and this time I'm trying to lose it with diet. I did a quick calculation of my caloric intake for Tuesday and it was between 1300-1500 calories and my TDEE is 1450 calories. So, given I'm eating around my TDEE and no more, I'm not surprised I lost that much weight.

Your metabolism could be greater though, which may explain a greater loss. I know the web does the calorie figuration for BMR and it's typically pretty accurate, but sometimes can be wrong. Mine says 1405 and when I did a metabolic breath test with a registered dietitian, she said I was actually burning 2050 calories a day at rest. 


Cutting out alcohol though can be a significant change though! I lose faster if I give it up/cut way back. 

Sorry! I mean my BMR is 1450, not my TDEE. I think I need more coffee.

[udscoobychick]

I believe 1-2 lbs/week is considered a healthy rate of weight loss.

I'm thinking I might drop off a box of cookies at the local paper. I have two friends who work there, and they've been working around the clock this week to keep up with everything, so it might be a nice surprise for the staff.

[gault]

I'm here but not here. We have a job fair today and it's all hands on deck.
bullygirl979 it sounds like you are just rocking with your discipline. Hugs.

cuddlyevil the positive thing is, you had the courage to ask him! Be really proud of that. It's not easy, especially with a friend.

[tiramisu]

My parents are going to be heading down today to help me get internet set up in my place. My mom is, thankfully, coming as a buffer because my dad can get ridiculous.

I test drove 3 cars yesterday and it was weird. It's going to be so strange having a different car. I actually liked the Accord more than I expected but my parents are still so down on that idea. "It's too big for you," "you don't need a car that big" and I can't figure out WHY this is such a thing. I told my mom that I know there's a chance I'll never have a kid, but if I did an Accord would probably be better than a Civic to be driving around. A car I like is being transferred to the CarMax by me and my parents are pushing me to find more cars to look at. Ugh.

[cuddlyevil]

Thanks ladies. Of course he responded to my last message this morning. He is a good guy, just a little bit dumb.

tiramisu, I am glad you are out looking at least. I know how much it stinks.

bullygirl979, I think you're just seeing the results of your being more careful with the diet.

[tiramisu]

Aug 17, 2017 11:44:32 GMT -5 cuddlyevil said:

Thanks ladies. Of course he responded to my last message this morning. He is a good guy, just a little bit dumb.

tiramisu, I am glad you are out looking at least. I know how much it stinks.

bullygirl979, I think you're just seeing the results of your being more careful with the diet.

He's a lot dumb. Don't make excuses in your head for him being weird and treating you disrespectfully in this instance. Even if it's just one instance it's still not okay.

[bullygirl979]

tiramisu, you need to get what YOU want. I drive a big ass SUV (Toyota Venza). Do I need it? Nope. But I like having all the space, being able to transport my bike, being able to move furniture, etc. etc. Plus, it's super comfy and for road trips it's awesome. I get your parents are trying to look out for you, but you aren't 21. You are capable of making a smart, adult decision.

[bullygirl979]

Thanks, guys. I know rationally that it's nothing. I think it's a combination of coming up on my 5 years (HOLY CRAP IT'S IN SIX MONTHS!!) and finding out about a lot of people having advanced caner or getting a recurrence. I think I was still stuck in the PSSSHHHHH...it won't happen to ME that in a way I'm feeling my mortality.

[cuddlyevil]

Aug 17, 2017 11:56:57 GMT -5 tiramisu said:

Aug 17, 2017 11:44:32 GMT -5 cuddlyevil said:

Thanks ladies. Of course he responded to my last message this morning. He is a good guy, just a little bit dumb.

tiramisu, I am glad you are out looking at least. I know how much it stinks.

bullygirl979, I think you're just seeing the results of your being more careful with the diet.

He's a lot dumb. Don't make excuses in your head for him being weird and treating you disrespectfully in this instance. Even if it's just one instance it's still not okay.

I am trying to qualify things in my head because of the likelihood that I totally misread things.

[tiramisu]

Aug 17, 2017 13:03:46 GMT -5 cuddlyevil said:

Aug 17, 2017 11:56:57 GMT -5 tiramisu said:

He's a lot dumb. Don't make excuses in your head for him being weird and treating you disrespectfully in this instance. Even if it's just one instance it's still not okay.

I am trying to qualify things in my head because of the likelihood that I totally misread things.

It doesn't matter whether or not you misread things, he's being dumb and not being respectful in this one instance. Besides, misreading or not, you have feelings, you are allowed to have feelings, and you are allowed to act on them by asking someone out. It's how he's handled the response that I don't like, that's all. But you did nothing wrong.

[tiramisu]

Aug 17, 2017 12:31:58 GMT -5 bullygirl979 said:

tiramisu, you need to get what YOU want. I drive a big ass SUV (Toyota Venza). Do I need it? Nope. But I like having all the space, being able to transport my bike, being able to move furniture, etc. etc. Plus, it's super comfy and for road trips it's awesome. I get your parents are trying to look out for you, but you aren't 21. You are capable of making a smart, adult decision.

Thank you! I know this, and there are more Accords than Civics on the used car market, but it's tough.

I forgot to say something earlier about your weight loss. That's great! You averaged 1.3 lbs/week and have been losing on purpose. Those are healthy, good things! I understand your fear, especially with everything you've been seeing around you. You are doing awesome though.

[bullygirl979]

Thanks, tiramisu. I'm also due to my chemo injection, too, so I wonder if there's just funky things going on with my hormones.

I get your parents wanting you not to sure and buy the first car you see, and it's nice they have a vested interest in your well-being. I hope they can let you make YOUR decision and not push you to make their decision. I bought my car through CarMax and it was a super easy process. I liked the no haggle thing. If you plan on financing, though, I'd shop around. I found a much better rate through a local federal credit union.

[udscoobychick]

Yeah, I got my car through CarMax, too...very simple and painless! I didn't shop around on the financing, though, because I'm lazy.

[doglove]

((((((( bullygirl979 ))))))))))

tiramisu, I second getting what you want no matter what the size is. I bought my subaru strickly because I did not want to sit DOWN in a car anymore even if it felt big to me.

I only had time for a quick peek in my stitch fix box when I got home to let Buddy out and excited that the stylist put in exactly what I asked for in terms of pieces and brands. The cross-body bag they sent is a little funky for my style, but I think that could be cool for me to switch it up along with having it be a color I don't normally wear.

[tiramisu]

Is there any negotiating room on CarMax prices?

[bullygirl979]

Aug 17, 2017 15:34:53 GMT -5 tiramisu said:

Is there any negotiating room on CarMax prices?

No. That's their whole gig. I tried and they shot me down right away. I asked a couple of people who bought cars from there, too, and they said the same thing.